It's as if the world stands still when he's inside of her. She is all that he has in this moment and he's perfectly fine with that. After all, she is all that he has ever wanted.
He murmurs her name, lips trailing along her neckline as she moves beneath him. She's intoxicating, every movement drawing him closer and he doesn't have the strength to stop himself. When she moans quietly it starts to undo him. He kisses her until she smiles. She then says something but he doesn't understand it. All he hears is her voice and sweet words spoken in his ear.
It's painful to hold back everything that he wants to say to her. There is so much love that he feels and is dying to give to her, but she won't take it. Her actions are understandable, but it hurts him to not speak the words that he wishes to say so badly. She has morphed him into a champion of holding down feelings. Repressing his feelings for her has become his most important task.
Arms wrapped around his back, she whispers his name, pulling him close. Smiling, he pushes deeper, reveling in her gasp as she leans her head back. It's becoming more and more difficult to contain himself and when she pleads it becomes near impossible.
This is a game he has played with many women over his adult lifetime. With her it is something special, something more than a game. It isn't just sex to him. While she may think it is just sex to her, her body tells a different story. He is not an oblivious person. When she asked for that moment of his time, her body language said far more than her words. She may not have heard his second message, but it was obvious she knew, and when he pulled himself together enough to lie and say that he thinks she made the right choice, he knows his eyes betray him. That's all they have ever done to each other: lie and watch as their bodies tell a different story.
He wishes he could stop wanting her. Life could be easy again, because with her it isn't easy. His life is wonderful when she is in it, but it isn't his real life. She could never truly be his, so he has to stop. He has to stop wanting her, but how the hell could he ever stop himself from that?
Especially when she pulls his body closer and gasps, her breathing coming heavily against his neck. He gives in, because when she says his name he realizes there is no reason to be holding back. And when the moment is over he finds himself looking at her, memorizing her features. So rarely does he get the chance to look at her in private, to truly see her. It's as if her current expression is one she saves just for him. While he may just be flattering himself, he hopes it is true. As he brushes her hair off her forehead he can finally answer his question.
He will never stop wanting her.