Disclaimer : If I owned Alex would I be wasting my time writing fanfic??? A/N: This is based upon a SheDaisy song of the same name. I also don't own the song.

A/N: This is based upon the SheDaisy song of the same name. Due to ffnet's policy on songfics I removed the lyrics from this version, but the full version can be found online or just send me a message and I'll send it to you.

- - - - - - - -

Isabel walked into her room, her jacket falling to the floor as she curled up onto the bed and wept silently. It had been two weeks since Alex had……she couldn't even think it. Her mind refused to think the word because that would mean her heart would have to accept it and she wasn't ready. She had cried so much in the last few days that she wasn't sure she had any tears left to cry. But then something would remind her of him and she would begin all over again. Only a few moments ago she had been sitting in the Crashdown when she had heard someone at a nearby table talking about the stars. The grief was so overwhelming that she had run out and come straight home. She wasn't ready to face the outside world just yet.

There was so much they hadn't had time to do. He had been ripped from her life long before she was ready to let him go. She wanted to do so many things with him. Not anything major, just the little things, like that video night that had never occurred. It seemed like a lifetime ago that they had been sitting together in the Crashdown, and Alex had revealed just how much he cared with the words 'I'd do anything'. He had always been honest with her, never afraid to voice just how he was feeling. And there was so much she had never said in return. That she needed him and believed in him. Loved him.

She loved him. Present tense. To her heart it didn't matter that he wasn't there in body, because he was still alive in her heart, in her soul. As long as she remembered him then Alex wasn't gone, not really. Convincing herself of this was the only way she found the strength to get up every day and carry on. Because as long as she was still living, Alex was too.

Sometimes, lying in her bed at night, she would trace her fingers over Alex's photo in her yearbook as she cried herself to sleep. That way she could pretend that the Alex of her dreams was the real Alex. That it was his dream, not hers. Those solitary nights had become the best part of her day, because when she woke up she was back in the world where Alex wasn't.

Sometimes she wished she could just stay asleep.

Since that wasn't possible, Isabel had found the next best thing. Alex's room, filled with all things Alex. She would curl up on his bed with her arms wrapped around the coat she had found which still smelled like him, and cry until she ran out of tears. It was ironic that the one thing that made her long for his comforting arms more than anything, was losing him.

And every time she did it she would promise herself that it was the last time. Alex would hate to see her this way. All he ever wanted was to see her happy. Surely she could do that, if not for herself, for him.

Yet again and again she would find herself back there. Back in a memorial to the life they could have lived. Her heart refused to let her move on, and if he was honest with herself she didn't want to. What she wanted was Alex. But that was never going to happen. Not now.

She wiped away the tears streaming down her face as she turned and buried her face into the pillow. Everyone told her that time would make this pain get better, but you could give her all the time in this life and the next and she would still miss him. Alex was her heart, and your heart wasn't something you could ever replace.

The End

A/N : No there is no sequel. I cried enough writing this one, that if you want a sequel you're going to have to pay me. That or leave lots and lots of loving reviews….