Words and Emotions
His hand gingerly held her injured fingers, gently nursing it. His pensive ice blue eyes on her deep wound, as he brought the digit to his lips, kissing it tenderly. His eyes penetrated hers with intensity as his other hand held her free one.
Bringing it down from his lip, he dropped her other hand, picking up the antiseptic iodine, applying a small portion to a small ball of cotton he held. Taking her finger, he pressed it against the cut, feeling her pain, as a cry of anguish escaped his younger twin sister.
He felt her pain, and greatly sympathised with her, as worry and concern laced his features. He didn't want to be applying the iodine to her wound, but she had insisted on being stubborn and not letting him help her slice the vegetables. In the heat of her obstinacy, she had diverted her attention from what she had been concentrated upon and the blade slipped, near missing taking off her finger.
The bright scarlet red blood that gushed in endless streams forth from the wound, showing no signs of faltering, brought an issued shrill scream from Aya, who held her hand, her face covered in pained anguish. She held her hand, the knife lying on the ground, the chopping board with small puddles of drying, crusting blood.
Her caring elder twin brother, who had left the room on her insistence, letting her be her stubborn pig-headed self, had only lurked out of the kitchen, standing at the door. Moving to the entrance, Aki turned a glance on her, his short blonde hair falling in his eyes as he moved from the doorway to see to her pained screaming.
He had immediately soothed her woes, by sweeping her hand into his, nursing away the hurt, as he applied his own techniques, that only they accepted.
With her sitting on the counter now, the vegetables long forgotten, the blood not cleaned up from the counter and the knife lazily on the floor, Aki took the sterile bandage wrap, carefully wrapping the injured finger. He made it tight enough to stop the blood from rushing forth, yet loose to not halt the flow of blood entirely.
Kissing the finger once more, his eyes twinkling seriously, Aki slipped an arm around Aya, pulling her off the counter, ignoring her exclamation of indignation as he took her in arm.
"Aki!!" She squirmed, trying to get down. She blinked, having second thoughts, remembering they were after all on the ceramic tiles of the kitchen. They would be hell to land on. She quickly opted to staying in her twin's hold. At least she had the reassurance he wouldn't drop her...
It seems she thought that much too soon, as she found herself being dropped. A short cry issued forth, before a grunt came. She blinked then blushed, realising her brother had dropped her on the couch, never intending to hurt her. But still, she had her dignity and didn't take well to being tossed around like a limp rag doll.
"Aki..." Her phrase was cut-off as he pressed his mouth over hers, silencing her in a soft, subtle manner. His lips brushed over his, pulling back after a lingering moment. Parting his slightly open lips from hers, he brought a hand to touch her cheek.
His eyes rested on hers. "Aya-chan." He whispered her name, moving in over her, as he held her beneath him, his eyes transfixed on hers so identical to his. Slowly he moved over, taking a dominant position over her.
Taking his twin's wrists, he pinned them over her head, using a single hand, his ice blue eyes penetrating hers, as he sighed softly. He didn't speak at first, just brought up his free hand, pushing blonde strands of hair from her face.
She blinked innocently, her eyes returning a deep gaze back to him, but she hesitated to speak. She wanted to say something about this. But, she felt it would be futile and useless in this instance.
"Don't say it, Aya-chan." Aki whispered against her skin, his lips brushing over her neck. As he spoke, his lips caressed her warm, dry skin. "It just feels right. If it was meant to be wrong, it would feel wrong."
A softly Aya sighed, gazing at her twin. She didn't want to admit he was right, but it seemed inevitable, as she let him gently soothe her pain in such a way. He was passion and sensitivity in one tidy bundle.
Her eyes were half-closed, as she submitted to deep thought before she uttered her reply to Aki's statement. Across her lips, a whispered quiet reply of was expressed. "But...it's still not right, even if it does feel right."
"Aya-chan, if it was meant to be wrong, it would feel wrong." Aki explained, his lips pressing down on her exposed collarbone. "How can you continue to deny what feels right simply because of what prudish puritans preach?! Feelings are wholesome, but denial is more than a river in Egypt. Please, stop listening to TV and society and follow your heart...
"I can read you like an open book and you're just trying to fit in. But no one ever needs to know about what goes on behind closed doors." He concluded, his hand gently placed over her heart, feeling the steady pulsating beat.
She felt her heart race, as blood rushed to her face. Never had anyone yet touched her there in such an intimate way. She gazed into her twin's eyes, unable to respond. How could she object when he knew exactly what her every desire was? How could she deny how she felt, when she knew her heart fluttered with the lightest of his touches; his lips on her flesh.
How she wanted to push him away and deny eternally the burning passion she felt at the gentle touch of his hand against her body. How she longed to forget such feelings, knowing in this world they were damning and wrong. But with him around, forcing her to face the music, forcing her to no longer deny the suppressed desires and emotions.
They were young as children, but in the middle, being thrown into the adult world of the unknown with no answers. She knew these emotions weren't just respect and admiration, but that of an adult female for her soul mate. Aya wanted to believe that this was going to be over, so she wouldn't have to deal with the way she felt about Aki - it felt dirty and sinful, yet, to feel his lips on hers was bliss and heaven.
A small thin sigh left her lips, as she averted her gazed elsewhere, trying to come to terms with his confessions of desire, passion and love. She knew he hadn't any qualms with the feelings he had toward her and that it was right. To her self, she couldn't deny what she felt for him, but still, verbally; she could and felt a duty to. Yet, at times like this, her will waver under pressure to succumb and accept.
It could be suffering and the inability for another girl to match up to what Aki wanted - or so Aya tried to get herself to believe, as she turned her eyes back to meet his. Raising a hand to his face, the back brushed gingerly over his cheek, she whispered, "Aki, are you sure about this?"
"Aya-chan..." His hand came up to tightly clutch hers. "I couldn't be more sure, nor more right. Please... Stop denying it. I know how you feel, it's in your eyes. I want you to just follow what is in your heart instead of what you think the rest of the world wants. They don't know what love is, they only attempt to weave their own twisted, perverted version, forcing people to deny what they want."
He spoke softly, his bangs hung down over his eyes, shadowing the limpid pools if ice blue orbs. He didn't push them back from his face, instead let the hair create an aura of mystery to him as he spoke.
Sighing, Aya gazed away. Yes, she did love her twin, but perhaps not in the way he loved her. She gathered that perhaps he wanted more than she could ever give him. It wasn't a question of if she loved him it was how. She didn't know if she would ever return the feelings that he had for her...
She knew maybe sisterly, but as a lover, she was reluctant. Society's status quo was deeply entrained and entrenched in her heart, as she couldn't deny it. Yet, it seemed utterly insignificant as she stared into his eyes, pleading with hers, speaking volumes, the feel of his lips over hers.
Placing her hands against his chest, she turned her face away, pushing Aki away from her. Softly, she explained her reasons. "Gomen nasai, oniichan..." she kept her gaze averted. "I don't feel the same." Truth was, she felt a flutter of excitement, but she believed it was only from unfulfilled desires of being single.
"Aya-chan…" sadness sat on his voice as he spoke her name. His eyes were melancholic from rejection. His shoulders slumped dejectedly. He had to give up. She had made it painfully obvious she didn't share the feelings he hoped would be returned.
Unrequited. That was his love. As twins, they were kindred spirits. He wanted more, she didn't and that hurt deeply.
He pulled off her, his blonde bangs hanging in his eyes. "Aishiteru, Aya-chan." He touched his lips to hers lightly. "I'll be waiting for you…" he whispered, before standing up. A sigh escaped him, his feet moving silently over the parquet floor.
Sitting up, she watched Aki depart from the room, a finger touching her lips, still feeling his sweet lingering kiss on them. Swallowing, she said nothing for a minute, registering just how she felt about it and his emotional words.
Morosely, she watched him leave the room, her heart heavy with regret. She knew she would never return the feelings he wanted her to.
'Gomen nasai, Aki…'