A/N: To elaborate, this is an AU where a few other canons take place; you'll see what they are over time. Also, special thanks to Rescue Bots for being the beta for this story! He's pretty much the reason why I took the time to fix up this chapter.
Present day, 8:04 AM
The bright sun towered over the Warner Studio Lot in Burbank as the birds pleaded for a mate to do some R-rated bidding (also known as chirping), and as people walked on the asphalt, doing errands in order to create gambles of movies that would either become a smash hit because it's either innovative and awesome, based off of a popular book franchise, or God knows why, or flop horribly because it's either so stupid that it makes Twilight look like Cowboy Bebop, or God knows why. But I digress, because our main focus is on the water tower, which for some reason, was never filled with water, not even before the Warners existed, apparently. Of course, if you're reading this, you know that instead, it was filled with endless insanity, caused by the aforementioned Warner siblings, what with the indoor roller coaster, the younger sibling having a civil war with himself, that one time the studio borrowed a kid with dangerous apocalypse powers from Tokyo back in 1988 and locked him up in the tower as the Warners (guess how that turned out), and now, the elder brother, Yakko, finishing his really, really long piece of literature.
"Yes! My masterpiece, my magnum opus, possibly the greatest piece of literature to ever exist!" he exclaimed. "It's finally finished after months of writing! Now all I have to do is publish it!"
"WILL YOU BE QUIET?!" the Warner sister, Dot pleaded.
She walked out of her room, with a rather groggy face that still spelt danger for anyone, even her usually capable brothers.
"What's the big idea anyway?!"
Yakko lifted himself off of his chair and dashed towards Dot.
"Dot! Good morning! Anyway, remember the secret project you and Wakko have been dying to see?"
"Yeah."
"Well, ahhhhhhhhhh, guess who finished a certain 43-chapter story that took over a year to write?"
"Hm…."Dot then realized what he was conveying and responded, "You?!"
"Yep!"
Dot's face went from tired and grumpy to joyful in the blink of an eye and called out for Wakko.
"WAKKO!"
"Yes?" he responded as he walked out of his room.
"He finished it!"
"He finished it?!"
"He finished it!"
"YEAH! FINALLY!" Wakko cheered.
Both siblings danced around for about 10 seconds. Apparently, it was a pretty big project, and because of Yakko's insistence of keeping it a secret to everybody (the internet, real life acquaintances, and even his own siblings), they were excited to see it after months of waiting. Who knows what has been written in that document in those numerous months, counting over the span of a year?
"Yakko, can we read it?!" Wakko and Dot both asked.
"Of course you can! But don't get too hyped up." Yakko modestly answered.
The two siblings sped to the monitor and saw the top of the first page on the dome screen, to see that Yakko was probably not too far off from his last line of dialogue.
"Author's notes…a pen name…a YEARLY CONTEST?!" Dot questioned.
"Hey, wait a minute! These are all fictional characters! He even included us, the Acme Loo cast, and everyone else!" Wakko realized.
They both stepped away from the computer in shock, as they realized that none of the speculations they've made (such as a story with original characters) have come true.
This was a fan fiction.
"A fan fiction?! When did you start writing, or, HECK, READING fan fiction?!" Dot yelled out in rage.
Yakko was distraught to see that his own siblings disapproved of the mere thought of fan fiction, which meant that they didn't like what he spent so much time and effort on.
"Look, ever since our show was cancelled, we really don't have anything to do besides the conventions and maybe a reunion or anniversary special once in a while." Yakko explained.
"Don't remind us, we nearly got the studio in a giant lawsuit with Japan during the 70th anniversary special for that one time we-"
"Wakko, we get the point, even if it was that little boy's fault that the entire city of Tokyo exploded and not ours. But I digress, because the point is that I like to watch TV. Don't we all? And ever since Warner Bros. called it quits on our show, I've started to like writing. Ergo, fan fiction. What's wrong with fan fiction, anyhow?"
Dot and Wakko stayed silent for a bit.
"Uh…we don't know." Dot responded, "We've just been told that it's an area of dangerous danger that we should never cross into."
"Come on, that's just the people who only read, uh…well, I tell you when you're older."
"We're 86 years old."
"Technically, you've still never hit puberty."
"Fair point. But why didn't you tell us sooner?"
"Because I knew something like this would happen, so I decided to keep my entire library of fan fiction a secret, which is the main reason I made separate accounts for you and Wakko."
"Really?! Actually, this is starting to sound like a good idea!"
"I agree!" Wakko declared.
"So, instead of judging a book by its cover, just give it a try. Read my majestic work of text typed into a screen." Yakko encouraged.
Wakko and Dot thought about it for a moment.
"Eh. Sure." They both said simultaneously.
They both walked over to the screen and started reading the doorstopper.
A/N: Hey, Yakattack93 here, and here it is! Deus Ex Machina: The Mega Crossover is finally finished after months of writing. Of course, I apologize for not just publishing the chapters one at a time, but then again, this means weekly updates, so it was worth the wait! Also, I would like to congratulate peri.13 for winning the yearly contest! Your reward is Blu-Ray copy of Dogcopter 4: The Wind Passes and the entire series of Cowboy Bebop! You also get an Air Jordan (I could only afford one, sorry).
("So THAT'S where our box set went!" Wakko realized. "Relax, I got the version with the vinyl sleeve and the whole soundtrack after I put our original one in a box." Yakko explained. "But you couldn't afford more than one Air Jordan?" Dot questioned. "I found the Air Jordan on the street, now just continue reading!")
Anyway, with that out of the way…
YAKATTACK93 PRESENTS:
DEUS EX MACHINA:
THE MEGA CROSSOVER
PROLOUGE
XXX
All Yakko could see was a white orb engulfing the city of Burbank, coming just yards away from the studio lot he lived in. For some reason, he started shaking, sweating, and he started to fell a chill…
He was nervous, for the first time ever. No, that would be an understatement; for the first time ever, he felt actual fear building up inside of him, something he didn't even feel when facing the devil back in the 1990s. Sure, there was Baloney, but he knew that he could overcome him, even if he did had to earn it, that time. However, this was truly something he felt he couldn't stop, or even escape. This was more than an earthquake, or anything else that happened in California before. This was karma getting him back for that one time he and his siblings accidentally blew up-
("WE GET IT!" Wakko and Dot shouted simultaneously shouted. "Well, SORRY for incorporating something into a work of fiction nobody will think ever happened." "That 70th anniversary special was on TV." Wakko said. "Just keep reading.")
"Yakko! Hold me!" Dot pleaded at the top of her lungs.
Yakko didn't respond; all he could focus on was his doom.
("Huh? Why don't you care about us in this story?" Dot whispered. "I do! But my mind is focused on the huge giant apocalypse orb!" Yakko explained. "Oh.")
What is this orb, he wondered, and why is it in Burbank of all places? Was it sent by a mysterious cliché force, or was this another one of Pinky and the Brain's hair-brained schemes?
("That isn't too far-fetched, actually." Dot commented. "Which is why I implied it.")
"Hey! What are you doing staring at the orb of death?! That will get us nowhere!" Dot yelled.
Yakko turned his head around instantly and walked towards Dot in order to hug her tightly.
"Dot, if we die, I'll miss you."
"But we're cartoon characters! We can't die unless we're dipped! Not even anime characters can die, all those bloody deaths are just talent!"
"Death is not my biggest worry. Chances are that all three of us and many other toons living here will live. What I'm worried about is that nothing else, including the humans in the area, will survive. What's the point after that?"
("What?! You didn't use a cliché?" Dot asked. "I thought you never read fan fiction." Yakko smugly replied. "False deaths are a cliché in all of media!" "Oh, good point.")
Dot stayed silent for a moment before responding, "I don't know."
Wakko then dashed to the duo of siblings.
"Are you two gonna be okay?" he asked.
"I think so…but what about everyone else, anyone who's not a toon?"
("You already said that." Wakko stated. "But you didn't hear." Yakko responded. "Oh.")
Wakko then got more worried and looked down at the floor in sorrow.
Yakko turned around, looked out the tower door, and saw that the orb was already engulfing the lot. This is it, he thought. The suspense felt like it was killing him from the inside, and he was now sweating like he just ran a trilithon. He couldn't take it anymore.
"Alright! I've had it! Come on, you orb of death! Take on me! Destroy this lot already!"
The whiteness then sped up immediately after he said that-
("Wow. Well, thanks a lot!" Dot said. "Would you do the same thing if you went through that anxiety?" "Well...yeah.")
-and engulfed the rest of Burbank.
("Isn't it obvious?" Dot asked. "Yeah, but I mentioned it anyway")
Unlike other pieces of media, Yakko kept his consciousness, but could not see anything, not even the siblings behind him. Instead, he just got sucked towards the center by an invisible force.
("So, you decided to not use a cliché, but then you used a cliché!" "At least I don't assume that the person sucked in gets knocked out." "Yeah, you have another point." "I find it funny that everything is justifiable." Wakko stated. "I find it hilarious." Yakko responded.)
In 2 seconds, he was already within the center of the orb, and then he found that he was transported somewhere else…
Yakko looked around the void with a blue hue; he looked left, and then right, and then he looked down. He saw a source of red light glowing, and he could faintly see…
Other people.
("What is it with the pauses?" "I want to keep it at a good pace, instead of just quickly saying the events." "He has a point, Dot. Why are you being so critical? It's only the first chapter." "Critical? I'm just asking questions!" "You're asking questions every two paragraphs, at most!" "What?! Am not!" "Are-" "Stop! We're not doing this thing! Let's just continue." Yakko interrupted.)
Of course, he started to fall down the long abyss, waiting for a clue, waiting for someone, waiting for anything…
How were his siblings doing?
("Not good, I presume." Dot guessed. "Are you sure? We seem to be capable of surviving this sort of thing." Yakko asked. "That's my side and I'm sticking to it." "Okay.")
XXX
Wakko slowly emerged from the rubble of what used to be the tower, and saw, among other things, that Dot was not only alive, but she barely had a scratch on her.
("Wait, what!?" "Ha! Told ya so!" Yakko playfully teased. "I mean, toons get visible injuries. Why wouldn't we get visible injuries?" "See? You are being too critical!" Wakko pointed out. "Look, flaws are present! Yakko would admit that, right?" Yakko just stood there silently for a few seconds. Dot grunted and asked, "Well?" "Um, yeah, I guess." "You see?" "But you're just being nitpicky!" "That's not a word!" "I made it up!" "Enough! Look, Wakko, I have an idea! See that next sentence?")
One of those other things included the fact that-
("Alright, here's the plan; if this ends up with the whole lot being destroyed, then you owe me…1 million dollars!" "What?! That isn't fair! Of course it's gonna end that way! I don't even have that kind of money…well, I would if Yakko got away with that check from that one time." "Well, I never said you had to blow the whole wad right now…but soon." "You already have more money than Yakko because of your VA career!" "You know what they say, the more, the-" "JUST READ IT!" Yakko snapped. "Fine.")
Wakko started dancing to the Macarena (well, you know which version) with a huge smile on his face while disco lights flashed across the room and the music blared throughout the tower. Meanwhile, Dot was having a nervous breakdown at the fact that she had just enough money to pay Wakko then and there. Oh, and for the obvious reason.
"THAT MAKES NO [REDACTED] SENSE! WHY THE [REDACTED] WOULD THE WHOLE ENTIRE [REDACTED] STUDIO LOT EXCEPT FOR THE TOWER BE [REDACTED] INTACT AFTER A HUGE EXPLOSION?!"
"It is never inferred that it was an explosion; it specifically said white orb.
"THEN WHY WOULD IT ENGULF ALL OF BURBANK?!"
"Actually, that's discussed in future chapters, so I won't tell you."
"I'D RATHER SUFFER A TERMINAL ILLNESS THAN PAY MY OLDER BROTHER MY BANK ACCOUNT JUST BY THE AVERSION OF A CLICHÉ!"
"Hey, you made the bet."
"AND YOU MADE THE DAMN FAN FICTION!"
"Yes, I can be considered the author. I did spend over a year writing it, you know."
"OH, AND I LOVE THE FACT THAT YOU'RE TREATING YOUR STUPID FAN FICTION AS CITIZEN KANE!"
"Look, I just need you to appreciate the fact that-"
"IT TOOK DELGO 9 YEARS TO GEt MADE AND YOU SPECIFICALLY CALLED IT THE WORST MOVIE YOU SAW SINCE MANOS THE HANDS OF FATE!" Dot predicted.
Everything suddenly went quiet, just the way Dot allegedly wanted it. As you could see, Yakko hated that movie with a passion, and his siblings knew that very well. Yakko decided to control himself and calmly talk to her. Wakko tried to walk over to Dot, but Yakko stopped him and whispered, "I got this."
Yakko walked over to Dot and calmly asked, "Are you just angry because of the bet? Look, you don't have to pay up."
"She doesn't?" Wakko asked.
"REALLY?! I DON'T!?" Dot asked in response to Wakko's disappointment, "FINE! PAY THIS UP!"
Dot flipped both of them off and ran out of the studio tower in rage.
"Wait! I didn't mean it!" Wakko yelled.
"Dot!" Yakko waited for a few seconds. "Ugh."
He followed Dot out and tried to speak to speak to her.
"Where are you going anyway?"
"Oh, just going to book a flight to Japan to relax!"
Yakko realized just what was going on and put on a face of shock.
"Are you really going to cause more trouble with the city of Tokyo or its successor?!"
"Maybe I am! You do know how far we can go with revenge on each other."
Yakko did agree, as they could destroy whole buildings just to get back at someone. With that, he sighed it off and did nothing. Dot continued to climb down, and she sparked a call with the airport as she stepped down from the ladder. Yakko probably would do something, except that something told him that she wouldn't get too far, since she has no idea what she's doing. In fact, as she walked into the distance, he started to smirk. He knew something that she didn't. Wakko then walked over to his elder brother.
"Um, is everything alright?"
"Yeah, she's just under a lot of stress. Don't worry, everything's gonna be fine."
"But she's going to Tokyo, I heard that part!"
"Meh, she knows nothing about that Esper kid…man..." Yakko stated as he reminisced. "Anyway, you wanna read the rest of the prolouge?"
"Yeah, sure!"
"Well…what did you think?!"
Wakko wasn't really sure what to think of it, actually. Sure, it wasn't as bad as Dot hyped it up to be, but so far, it wasn't that much of a masterpiece.
"…I guess it was pretty good?"
"Yeah, the first chapter isn't really the best. Don't worry, it gets better from here."
"I didn't know you were interested in FLCL."
"Now you know, of course!"
"I also didn't know that the voice actor for the rapping dog from the animated Titanic movie was in Kiki's Delivery Service."
"Not the Disney version, actually."
"Speaking of which, I thought the fight scene between you and the baker was pretty weak."
"I mean, he is a baker. It was a curb-stomp battle."
"However, I'm starting to see your ego in this story, considering you win everything and survive everything. Also, Dot acts a little too much like a real little girl."
"That's sort of how I view her, being the parental guardian that I am."
"Hm. Anyway, I'm not sure if I want to read the rest."
Yakko paused for a second, sighed, and responded.
"Yeah, that's okay. It's your choice. It's not like I'll be around to force you to do stuff."
"Huh? Why?"
"Well, I have to go on a little vacation for a day or two. I gotta deliver the prize to the person who won the contest."
"What? Haven't you heard of the postal service?"
"Look, I think that whoever won the contest deserves more than the actual prize. She did have to recite 5 songs from the show, including the Countries of the World."
"Really?! She actually did that?!"
"Yep. So, I'll be on my way to, ahhhhhhhhh…"
Yakko looked at the address on the monitor and saw it was pretty far.
"Woah! Beach City, Delmarva! That's across the country! Well, it's still around noon, so I might as well dash over there!"
Yakko took the box of prizes, said "goodbye" to Wakko, and rushed out the door. Because he was a toon, he was gonna make there within a few hours with no problem.
Wakko was left alone, with no siblings around, and pretty much nothing to do…unless…
"Hey! I know!"
Wakko rushed to the monitor and started brainstorming some ideas.
He was going to make a fan fiction.
Hope you liked it! Please leave a review and you're sure to see a response in the next chapter! Thanks for reading!