A/N: This is my first fic, so I'm sorry if it sucks. Reviews are always accepted, even if

they're flames. I can't fix what I'm not aware of.

I'm only saying this here, because there's no point in putting it in ever chapter. I don't own Naruto or Godsmack.

Awake Chapter 1: Sick of Life

"Paralyzed, nothing's getting through to me,
Hypnotized, from all my surroundings…"

Naruto lay in the hospital bed, asleep. Sasuke had run away, and Naruto had been seriously injured trying to stop him. If it weren't for an amazing amount of luck, even with the kyuubi healing him, he would be dead right now.

--Dream--

Naruto found himself watching what had happened with Sasuke over and over again. He watched as his best, no, only friend betrayed him. Every time he watched it, a knife was pushed further and further into his back, he could feel its icy embrace as it skewered him. He looked down in shock the knife now stabbed through, the tip coming out of his chest. There was a bright light, and pain shot through him, he felt as if he was going to explode.

--End Dream--

Naruto woke up from that terrible dream, drenched in cold sweat. He was really depressed. What had now been the worst day of his entire life would now haunt his dreams endlessly. He would be forced to relive it over and over. His depression sunk further. 'Sakura probably hates me' he thought 'and the rest of the village as well,
for not bringing back their precious Uchiha.' He could barely move, all he could successfully move was his head and neck. As the night progressed however, he was able to move more and more. He decided that he would tap into the kyuubi's chakra, and see if it helped speed up his recovery. No dice. After an hour or so, he was able to stand
up, he wanted out, and now. He noticed someone asleep in the chair across from his bed. It was Hinata, just another one of the people who he'd disappointed. He didn't want to have to face any of them ever again. No more cold glares from the side of the street. It's not his fault that the kyuubi was still alive inside him, he can't control that. Or could he?

Hinata's Dream--

She was falling… Where was she falling from… She didn't know… She looked to her left, there was a boy there. She recognized him as Naruto, he was crying. "Why are you crying Naruto-kun?" She asked, but there was no reply. It was as if he couldn't hear her, he didn't seem to notice her being there at all. She looked down, there was the water, drawing dangerously close. There were rocks jutting out of the water, worn away from the constant ebb and tide of the water against the rock face. She looked over at Naruto, it didn't seem to bother him that they were falling, it seemed like he was glad, but why?

End Dream--

An hour after Naruto had left, Hinata bolted upright in the chair she had been sleeping on, watching over him to make sure nothing happened. She looked over at Naruto's bed, he had been heavily sedated, enough to paralyze him for another day or so at least. He wasn't there. She did a double take, "NANI?" She scrambled around, peering under his blanket, the bed, anything and everything. "Naruto-kun, where are you?"

Naruto--

"I wanna be, something I could never be,

and I wanna say, things that I could never say…"

Naruto arrived at his home. He walked into his apartment and into his bedroom, he let himself collapse on his bed and let everything loose. He broke into tears. Why was all of this happening? Why did Sasuke leave? Sasuke was the only person he ever truly considered his friend, but Sasuke left, betrayed the village to get the power needed for revenge. He knew that he couldn't bring Sasuke back. Everything in his life seemed trivial. Everyone else knew their limitations, why didn't he? He had to keep pursuing the pointless goal of becoming Hokage. It seemed stupid to him as he sat thinking about it. No one would let him become Hokage, no one trusted him with anything, let alone an entire village. He was doomed to live a pointless lonely life, with everyone hating him. He was sure that Sakura would shun him forever, joining ranks with the others who gave him those cold stares as he walked by. His entire being was decimated, shattered beyond recognition.

He knew what he was going to do, but how would he do it? He got up and got dressed and left a note, not that he expected anyone to read it. He was going to the place where he first became a ninja, fully intending to contemplate the end of his ninja career, the end of his life. What was the point of living if you weren't going to actually be able to live?

Hinata--

How did Naruto leave, and where did he go? So many questions were running through Hinata's mind. She was told he'd be sedated for two days, on top of the week he'd already been in the hospital, and that they weren't expecting him to leave, but they had her watch him incase something happened anyway. She wasn't completely surprised by this whole thing, it was Naruto-kun after all, he always seemed to recover from things fast, she didn't know how, but he always did. She was running through the village looking for Naruto. She knew of only three places to check, and she was coming up to one of them right now, the Ichiraku ramen stand. She looked inside, not seeing him, she turned around and headed towards his apartment. She let herself in, and went to his door. She knocked, but there was no response. She tried the doorknob, it was unlocked, so she opened it, biting back her nervousness, this was for Naruto-kun after all. She walked into his apartment, which was a bit tidier than she had expected. There was a coffee table in the middle of the room, and she saw a note on it. Picking up the note, she quickly read it. It read:

"To anyone who actually bothers to read this,

I've gone, don't expect to find me, because I'm going to kill

myself, I'm going to jump off a cliff. No one cares about me, I've never been loved, there's no reason for me to keep on living. If you don't already know, I have the demon kyuubi sealed inside of me. Let all the people who gave me those cold stares realize that they've killed me, a human being, not a demon. This isn't the only reason I'm doing this, but it doesn't matter anymore, nothing matters anymore. Goodbye forever.

Uzumaki Naruto"

"NANI?" Hinata panicked. She rushed to see the Hokage, with the note clenched in her hand, tears streaming down her face.

When she reached the Hokage's office, she burst in. Sakura was at a table doing something with a fish, and Tsunade was at her desk, reading something that seemed important. "Someone help" she forced out between breaths. Sakura looked up and the fish she was working with died.

"What's the matter Hinata?" Sakura asked, with a worried expression on her face. Tsunade stood up, a worried expression also graced her visage.

Naruto--

"Yeah, I'm gonna do it again, I'm gonna do it again,

I'm gonna do it again…"

Naruto walked down the alley leading to the Hokage monument. When he got there, he pulled out a can of spray paint. If he was going to leave, he was going to make sure everyone knew he was gone. When he was finished with his graffiti on the faces of the previous Hokages, it hit him fully, his face would never be on this mountain. But he knew that it didn't matter anymore. He quickly and silently left the village that he used to call home, and where no one understood him.

Sakura--

Sakura sat dumbfounded. She had just read the note Naruto left. Hinata was crying next to her. Tsunade, having read the note right before Sakura, was contemplating what to do. She knew that he probably thought that she hated him, which was untrue, she didn't. She was starting to realize that her "love" of Sasuke was stupid and would never be reciprocated, especially now that Sasuke was gone. She had been reviewing her feelings for Naruto, not knowing what to think. She knew all along that Naruto had liked her, but she was too obsessed with Sasuke to really care too much about it. Now that she had given up on Sasuke, she had spent the last week or so considering Naruto. After all, Naruto had always been there for her, she couldn't say the same about Sasuke. That was it, she decided that she would have liked to be with Naruto, but now it was too late… too late… Why? Why now when she finally realized her feelings for him?

"Oh god, why now?" Sakura said, Hinata looked at her, Sakura could tell she understood what Sakura meant, and she cast her look downwards once more.

Hinata--

Hinata sat on the floor of Tsunade's office, bawling. She didn't care about anything anymore, not now that Naruto-kun was gone. She remembered him laying in bed at the hospital, how she had been so worried about him. He was sleeping, and he looked so peaceful. It was then that she decided to tell him her feelings when he woke up. After what had happened to him, she had to let him know, just in case something else happened. Watching him sleep had brought a feeling of calm over her, and it was then that she had drifted asleep and had that weird dream. 'WAIT! THAT DREAM!' Hinata remembered the dream she had in the hospital, They had been falling, and from what she remembered, it had been very similar to a cliff. She got up and ran out of Tsunade's office, leaving the pair baffled.

Naruto—

"Sick of my life, I'm tired of everything in my life,

Dragged down, rubbing my face in the ground,

No time, for the undecided,

I wanna know, why I've always felt alone,

And I wanna love, why am I untouchable..?"

Naruto was sitting in the same tree he had been sitting in for hours. He didn't care about anything anymore. Everyone in Konoha had shunned him as long as he could could remember, and the only girl he had ever liked had never shown anything in return. Not to mention the business with Sasuke. He was so sick of it all. Why couldn't anyone love him? Why did everyone have to despise him? He sat contemplating everything, even though it didn't really matter, but he would like to clear some things up in his mind before he did what he was planning. The sun was halfway up in the sky when he decided that he had done enough thinking, it was time to do it. He wondered how people were reacting to his graffiti, he hoped they didn't party too hard…

Sakura--

Sakura had been with Tsunade all night, crying her eyes out and spilling her heart. Tsunade had been caring, she had sat there, consoling Sakura until the crying lessened. When the crying eased off a bit, she got up, thanked Tsunade and opened the door to leave. In front of her was the Hokage Monument, and she instantly started sobbing uncontrollably again. There, in big letters on the faces of the Hokages was written:

"Today marks the death of the greatest ninja to live in Konoha by the hands of the uncaring people who live there."

It was signed with Naruto's trademark spiral. Tsunade walked up behind Sakura to see what the matter was and she joined in the crying as well.

Naruto--

"Sick of my life, I'm tired of everything in my life,

I never wanted to be sick of my life, I'm tired of everthing in my life…"

Naruto walked up to the cliff that he knew feel precipitously down and there were rocks jutting out of the water with his name on them. It was a good 100 foot drop, 'Perfect' he thought. He threw off his Konoha forehead protector, he didn't want to die representing a country that held so much scorn for him. He peered over the edge one last time, walked back a couple steps, got a running start, and leapt as high as he could into the air, he wanted to ensure the outcome. He plummeted down, why live in a world that hates you?

A/N: Good? Reviews will be happily accepted, please. I plan on making this a complete fic, but if no one likes it, I'll stop it here shrugs