Title: Selfish Faith
Author: NemKess
Fandom: Moon Child
Pairing: Kei/Sho
Disclaimer: Not mine, no money made, yadda, yadda, yadda.

Warnings: mild slash, blood letting

Summary: Kei and Sho's relationship progresses over time and experience.

Note: The sequel to Selfish Impulses, but it can stand alone, too, I suppose. Big, big thank yous to Sel-kaasan (spinshadow) for beta/edit/hugs/Dew and letting me use her compy to post.

The rat-a-tat-tat of automatic guns rang in Sho's ear as he darted behind a stack of crates. He spared them little thought, though. The guns behind him weren't nearly as frightening as the raspy gasps of breathing in his ears.

He knelt down and slid his precious burden off his shoulders, onto the floor.

"Kei..."

There was a flurry of activity as Toshi slid around the corner. Sho settled onto the floor and pulled Kei against him.

"Ha! Missed us, you losers!" Toshi taunted, firing around the corner. Only to yelp and cringe closer as the ground next to him was torn up by bullets.

"Baka," Sho muttered, both at Toshi and at the unconscious vampire in his arms.

Toshi reloaded and glanced over curiously. "Shouldn't he have healed by now?" Sho nodded grudgingly. It didn't bear thinking about, but Kei had been out for a while and the worry refused to go away. "Well," Toshi urged, poking at the vampire with his gun. "What's wrong with him, then?"

Slapping away the weapon, Sho shrugged. Though he had a pretty good idea, he was reluctant to share his suspicions with Toshi. If Kei wanted to starve himself, that was his own business, after all.

Except when it led to situations like the current one, he mused.

"I don't think he's eaten recently," Sho muttered, leaving out the deliberate nature of Kei's starvation.

He knew Kei thought he hadn't noticed, but Sho had spent almost a decade as the vampire's near constant companion. The increased nightmares and decreased hunts could have been ignored but when they were accompanied by the fatigues and listlessness... The signs were obvious.

"Shit," Toshi muttered. "We're dead."

And didn't that sum it up nicely, Sho thought with a grimace. They were too dependent on Kei's superhuman strength and speed to survive on their own when he went through his periodic bouts of masochism.

That was going to have to change, he decided as he pulled a small knife out of his boot. First they had to get out of the mess into which Kei had gotten them.

"What are you doing? That won't do much against these guys." Ignoring his companion, Sho drew the blade across his palm. "Oi, Sho!"

"He got us into this mess and he's damn well gonna get us back out of it."

Toshi's alarm didn't seem to be much eased. If anything, he looked more worried as Sho cupped his bleeding palm against Kei's slack mouth. "But what if-"

"Toshi, there are too may of them." He broke off with a wince as teeth sank into his already injured palm. The sting of it was quickly soothed by a lapping tongue and it took a second for Sho to concentrate back on his friend. "If he doesn't feed, we'll all die... This is the best chance we've got."

He'd seen a hunger crazed Kei feed before and he knew the risk he was taking. If the vampire's sense of self-awareness didn't return in time, there was a very real chance that he'd drain Sho dry without realizing it until the deed was done and Sho was dead.

Being gunned down by hired thugs like a helpless little street rat or giving his own life to save the people who meant the most to him in the world?

Kei would never forgive him, but Sho knew which death he preferred.

"We're both gonna die anyways," Toshi muttered. "He's gonna kill you on accident and then me on purpose for letting it happen." He fired around the corner, not even pretending to aim. Then he grinned. "At least he'll kill all those bastards, too, ne?"

"Aa..." Sho agreed as he laid his head back against the crate, not bothering to fight the dizziness that accompanied the blood loss. In all likelihood, Kei would take his guilt and anger out on their attackers, ripping the other men to shreds. Sho'd seen that happen before, too.

"Ne, Sho?"

"Hm?" Toshi's voice sounded strangely distant. Sho concentrated on the feel of Kei's teeth and the warm mouth still steadily sucking away his life blood.

"It's been fun, ne?"

"Aa..."

Toshi gripped his shoulder. "If we have to die, at least it's not alone, ne?"

"Hm..."

"Sho?"

Sho couldn't answer as he let the darkness take him.

After Luka's suicide, Kei had promised himself that he'd never care for anyone again. There were few enough benefits in caring for someone in the first place and none that outweighed the pain of loss. He'd embraced the monster that he was and shunned the living world around him with a fervor he hadn't possessed even in those early days right after Luka had turned him.

He'd existed simply to prey on others with no thought beyond sharing his own pain with anyone foolish enough to cross his path.

Not once in those years had he even been tempted to break his oath.

At least, not until a scrawny little orphan with big fearless eyes pushed his way into Kei's life and forced him to feel again.

Three long days passed where Sho lay silent as death on their futon. Three days since he'd woken up on the floor of a dirty warehouse with the sweet taste of Sho's blood on his lips and only the faintest thump of a heartbeat in his ears.

It had been the longest three days Kei had ever experienced, as a mortal or a vampire.

"Baka," Kei whispered, as he brushed sandy bangs away from Sho's face. "If you don't wake up soon, I'm going to turn you just so I can kill you properly."

It was an empty threat, but just saying it made him feel a little better. He lay his head against Sho's shoulder and just listened to the steady thump-thump.

Kei shuddered to remember how close he'd come to silencing the precious heartbeat forever.

Just a few minutes more...

Shinji had only come by on the very first night. Flying high on the latest fad drug, he'd been more interested in fighting with Kei than the little brother who loved him so much and lay so very close to death. One day, Kei knew, Sho was going to have his eyes opened to what his beloved 'aniki' really was. He dreaded that day. He had no great love for Shinji, the boy was little better than half the brainless thugs he'd fed off of over the years, but he dreaded the broken heart that the knowledge would cause Sho.

"You're so blind," he murmured. "Toshi is probably the only one of us who deserves to be seen through your rose-colored vision." Reckless, goofy Toshi whose only real sin was that his common sense couldn't keep up with his good nature and big ideas. "Shinji is a weak, manipulative little shit who isn't even worthy of your pity, let alone your love. And me... I'm just a monster you should have left to burn up in that alley."

The weak hand that flopped against Kei's shoulder in a pathetic attempt to hit him managed to completely startle him as little else had since he'd woken up one night with the super-senses of a vampire. "... na' ... mo'ster..."

Fierce joy stabbed at his chest, more painful than a thousand knife wounds and, for a moment, all the vampire could do was press his face harder against Sho's shoulder as he grappled for control. Sho was the crybaby, not Kei.

With an explosive growl, Kei stood and stalked as far away from Sho as the small room would allow before turning and stalking right back. "What the hell did you think you were doing, idiot?!" Though Sho looked like he wanted to say something, Kei didn't give him the chance. He just steamrolled over him, pacing and letting the fear he'd felt over the last three days turn into anger. Anger, he could handle. They were old friends, him and anger.

"I could have killed you! And that's the best case scenario. I swear, you don't ever fucking think! Only a complete fucking moron sticks a bleeding hand right in front of a hungry vampire's face! I could have ripped you to fucking pieces!"

Weak fingers tugged at his pants leg as he paced by the futon again. "Bu' you ... di..n't..."

Fond exasperation began to edge out the anger and Kei dropped down to his knees beside his friend again. Sho's blind faith was something that he craved, something he'd gone out of his way to encourage over the years. Sho was the only person since Luka who'd looked at him and seen him, not the monster. Selfish as always, he'd clung to the worshipful affection his young friend offered. It couldn't go on, though. This incident drove that point home as little else ever could have. "But I could have... Don't you get it, Sho? Do you have any idea how I'd feel if I woke up sitting in pieces of your body?"

"'m not sorry..." His words were so slurred by sleep and weakness that Kei had to strain to understand.

"Sho-"

"No." Big brown eyes blinked tiredly as Sho sighed and tugged at his sleeve this time. "please?"

Kei rolled his own eyes, but crawled into the bed anyway. Sho didn't say anything else until they were comfortably snuggled together on the futon. "Sho-"

"wouldn't..." The boy sighed and curled closer. "Kei ... wouldn't hurt ... Sho..."

Before the vampire could refute the claim - he'd already hurt Sho, left him comatose for days and weak as a day-old kitten when he finally stirred - a soft snore escaped his companion. Kei sighed and shook his head. "Baka," he muttered, settling in and letting his own weariness take over. "You'll be the death of me someday, damned if you won't."

That thought shouldn't have been as comforting as it was.

The End