Exiles
Sienna Dastaro let out an annoyed huff, typing another sentence into the holo-computer. ERROR. She typed another quick series of commands, fingers flying off the keyboard in a flurry of motion. ERROR. It was times like this when she missed the calming presence of people. Someone who would be there to help her fix the dang computer, or someone to shout a suggestion from the main room. It seemed that the entire ship rang with memories of her old friends and companions.
She lay her head down in her hands and resisted the urge to burst into tears.
"Where are you, Revan?" she murmured under her breath, "I know that you're out here somewhere."
Her computer beeped and she raised her head quickly, blonde hair flying out of her face. She hurriedly wiped the tears from her eyes, her fingers flying across the keypad.
"Incoming transmission," her computer's electronic voice told her.
Sienna's fingers sped up yet a face flashed across the screen before she could stop it from appearing. Her fingers froze, her eyes riveted to the face displayed across the holoscreen. For the second time that day she almost burst into tears.
"Sienna," he said, his voice rougher than she remembered, but definitely, definitely his.
It was the voice that had inspired millions, the face that had struck the hearts of every one of his soldiers, the man that she had never, never given up on.
"Revan," she breathed.
He sighed, gazing at her with age old eyes. How long had it been since she had looked him in the face? She could still remember the last time she had seen him. She had been nineteen. Strong for her age, but barely a knight.
"Revan," she called loudly, her voice ringing over the sound of the two generals talking.
The two voices stopped abruptly, but her attention was only focused on one man.
"What have you been doing?"
She looked up at him, hating that he was almost a foot taller than her. That he had the unfair advantage of being male. She hated that only now she noticed that his olive toned skin was unnaturally pale, that his amber eyes were ringed with a mad yellow. She hated that. He raised one eyebrow on his absurdly handsome face.
"I'm planning strategies with my general," he said calmly, though she didn't miss the cold tone in his voice.
"I just got a holo-transmission from the Jedi Council. You told us that they'd approved of the missions that you were sending us on."
"I lied," he said so calmly that she almost shivered, almost.
Malak behind him looked at her with a smug smile and she scowled at the older man.
"They could have our lightsabers," she cried out in frustration, "Gods, Revan do you know what you've gotten us into?"
He looked at her, bemused.
"I never intended to return to the Jedi after the war," he said slowly, "I have loyal men here, loyal to me. Not to the republic or the Jedi Council. I thought you understood the situation."
"You thought wrong," she hissed venomously, "I would never betray the Jedi."
"The Jedi are weak minded fools," he said. It would have been easier if he was shouting, but his voice seemed cold and unattached, "the Jedi Empire will fall with their narrow minded views. They think they are too far above everyone else. They have not seen the things that I have seen. They are emotionless guarders. They despise all that I hold dear. Justice," he said, saying the word as if it were a disgusting piece of dirt stuck to his shoe, "is simply a tool of the weak."
"I don't know you anymore," she said softly, backing away.
He grasped her wrist with a large hand pulling her small form against his chest.
"Stay with me, Sienna," he whispered silkily in her ear, "You can have all you ever wanted. Power beyond anything you ever imagined. We could be great you and I."
She shivered, pulling herself out of his embrace.
"You have fallen too far," she said, "to ever be redeemed. Goodbye, Revan."
"Where are you going?" he said and for a moment she thought he would stop her.
"Away from you.
Those were her last words to him, before jumping in her ship and disappearing.
"I'm sorry."
"What?" she asked shakily, trying to clear from her mind their last meeting.
"I'm sorry for everything. For falling to the darkside. For not telling you what we were doing. For never finding you when I was better. For leaving without saying goodbye. For never telling you how I felt. For never trusting you. For everything."
She was struck with the urge to make some petty comeback or burst into tears and she wasn't sure which one she was going to do.
"Where are you?" she asked, not liking how her voice shook slightly.
"On the next planet over. It's called Tara. The only people here are the friendly native species. I've been building a temple here. One day I hope to bring younglings. It is more remote that Coruscant, after Dantooine was destroyed I felt I owed it to them somehow."
She laughed. Long and hard and she had to clutch her side to stop. He looked at her bemused, but she could tell that he was confused over the source of her amusement.
"What's so funny," he asked when she'd controlled her laughter.
"That's why you left," she said softly, the humor gone from her voice, "you left your friends behind, the Republic in pieces, the Jedi in disorder, you left me to pick up the pieces. Gods you are so stupid!"
She was yelling now. And she could feel the tears running down her cheeks.
"They took the force from me. Ripped it from me and I was left stranded and alone for years. Rather that that then join the darkside. I was by myself, Revan! The only Jedi, the exile. They hunted me, they preyed on me, and there wasn't a moment of peace. And then when I'd put your mess back in place, I went in search of you. I thought you were in danger. And you, you have been blending in with the natives. Starting a Jedi temple."
"I left behind my friends for you. Left behind safety and security. Company and anything I could have wanted. For you. "
Revan had enough since to look abashed.
"I'm sorry Sienna. I- I, "he seemed at a loss of words, "I didn't know."
"What the hell did you think had happened Revan?" she asked him, green eyes shining with anger and tears, "That they'd accepted me into their little council, that I'd joined the enemy. My entire life I've given to you and it has always brought me pain and suffering. Mical was right, I should have just stayed with him."
"Mical?" Revan asked in a tone of voice that would have once made Sienna laugh.
"None of you business," she said stiffly.
"Now that I know that you're safe and sound, I'm turning this junk house of a ship-"
"Don't you dare."
She looked him straight in the eyes giving him her fiercest glare.
"Please, Sienna. I can't lose you again."
He stared at her. Amber eyes no longer tinged with yellow, olive skinned glowing healthily.
"I can't trust you," she said.
"I know. I'm just asking you to try."
"No."
"I've changed. I'm a different man than I was. I can swear it."
"Goodbye, Revan."
"Where are you going?"
For a moment she was stuck with an almost incurable urge to say the words that she'd said to him ten years ago. 'Away from you.' Childish she supposed, but tempting.
"Home," she said, before the wretched words escaped her mouth, "to people who love and care about me."
"I love you."
It was an instinct, she told herself, his way of keeping me here.
"Me, too."
She hadn't meant to say it, and as soon as it escaped from her mouth she wanted to draw it back in. The Jedi didn't love. But she, she wasn't a Jedi. She cared too much. About everything, she was too passionate, a tad too reckless. She depended too much on the company of others. She supposed that Revan cared too much too. It was probably driving him crazy to be all alone down there without anyone that understood him.
He was looking at her now. Analyzing her statement to see if it was true. It bothered her that he could probably see that she wasn't lying. She wished she was. She wished she could tell if he had been lying or not, she couldn't ever see past that mask of his.
"But it doesn't matter," she found herself saying, "that I love you I mean. Because I'm leaving. I need to return. There are no dark forces to fight. The galaxy is safe. And my friends, they need me back in the Republic.'
"I'll be there," he said suddenly.
"What?" she snapped.
"If you won't stay here with me, then I'm going with you."
No way mister, not part of the deal.
"No."
"We're both exiles," he said, "Why can't we return together?"
"Please."
When had she resorted to begging?
"Meet me in a day. I'll be there."
"This is my ship."
His holographic face let out a broad smile.
"I stole it first. First claim.
"This ship is leaving today, without you on it."
But even as she said it, she knew she would wait. She hadn't given up yet.
"See you then."