She is going to haunt me; I know that much. And it's certainly not that greenish cave-light, but that might have helped. She tried to help me, really and truly, she did. She understood, and listened, even after everything I've done. I chased her all the way across the world, for goodness' sake. But for a moment there, that all seemed forgotten, didn't it? Maybe it was just the light there; that's all it was. Made us forget who we are, what our destinies are. But just for a minute, we both remembered pretty soon.
Mai's here now; she waited for me all this time. Waited for you? Who are you kidding? She thought you were a traitor, probably thought you a disgrace the Fire Nation. But she loves you now, doesn't she? I don't know. I don't seem to know anything anymore.
I can't imagine people more different: Katara and Mai. Fire and water: opposites, I guess. I doubt Katara's ever met anyone she didn't want to help, and well, Mai doesn't seem to care about anyone. The most affection I've ever got from her is "I don't hate you." My first real conversation with Katara and she offers to change my life. No Zuko. Stop comparing them. She rises with the moon; you rise with the sun, remember? And besides, if she didn't completely hate you before, she certainly does now. You betrayed that little trust she gave you, and there is no way you are every going to get it back, just like with Uncle.
Oh. Uncle. I'm so sorry, really, I am. Did I even make the right choice? I'm beginning to doubt myself. With every mile closer to home we get, the more I dread it. What can it be like, without you, without Mom there to guide me? What would you say of Katara? I think you would like her, although perhaps not in the way you like Mai. She is so full of love, but maybe with fewer tea-making skills than would satisfy you.
Stop, Zuko. There are not choices. Katara and Uncle are enemies on the side of the Avatar and against the Fire Nation.
Is Lee an enemy too? A child whose only wish is the return of his father and brother? Yes. He will grow up, and join the army, and fight you. He will fight you for his home, and for his family.
And what will you fight for? Your father's acceptance? No doubt a worthy cause. Certainly worthy enough to justify betraying the one who truly believed in you? Who saw the good in you?
I have made my choice and I know my destiny. I shall be Zuko, Crown Prince of the Fire Nation, son of Ozai and Ursa, nor longer "the banished prince" nor "Lee the outcast." I shall return to a life of pleasure, of luxury, a life that is mine by birthright. I have a girlfriend who loves me, who understands me, and who is meant to be with me: the fire sages determined that long ago.
I wonder how the turtle-ducks have been, and who has fed them in my absence.