A/N: I've decided to start a dumping grounds for LOTRO snippets, usually crackish and quest-related. The perfect one to start this off, I think, is the one quest which had more people in one place than any quest before.
Won't make much sense to anyone who (fortunately?) missed the Birthday Quest this year.
Postman Grubb was having a fine day, resting by the mailbox (what with those new helpers, the Quick Post was back on its feet and he didn't have anything to do) when the warmth of the sun on his face went away. He cracked open an eye and yelped.
Standing before him were at least a dozen battle-hardened warriors, ranging from scarred Men to lofty Elves to sturdy dwarves to even a few hardy hobbits.
They were all looking at him.
"Tell us a story," one whispered, and they all took up the chant.
"Tell us what happened when Bilbo disappeared."
"Tell us the story, Postman Grubb."
"Tell us the story."
Postman Grubb of Hobbiton squeaked and fainted.
He didn't know how long he'd been there, but when he awoke with a start the dozen warriors had more than doubled.
A few held out flowers and food, one was on her knees begging, two looked like they were measuring the distance between him and the river, several had been busy dancing and talking with each other, and a couple were staring absently into space.
"He's awake!" shouted someone very near him with a hand that seemed to match the smarting spot on his cheek. Had—no, surely not. The crowd stopped what they'd been doing and surged toward him. "Tell us the story, please!"
He managed to stammer out his story and eased behind the mailbox while the group shot off in every direction, wide smiles on their faces.
"Been hours," he heard. "Never thought he'd wake up."
"Bogo's awake!" one of them shouted jubilantly, and the crowd ran towards the stable master.
The door to the Ivy Bush slammed and one of the warriors stomped outside. "The Storyteller's still asleep!" he screamed angrily.
Postman Grubb took another look around, silently cursed Old Mad Baggins, and hid inside.