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edward...edward! i collapsed onto the cold mossy ground and cryed myself to sleep in the forest. it was cold. the ground colapsed from under me and i
screamed.
why me? all i wanted was edward to be my forever. i would give anything for him. soon i was lost in despair, i truly felt like i was dying inside and out.
"bella!" i was shaken awake by charlie rubbing my arm.i looked around and found myself to be in my room, sweaty and half awake. that dream
again. i wish i could just forget about edward. he wouldnt help me. he left me. edward dose'nt love me. "bella are you ok?" i looked into charlies
worried and sleepy eyes.i couldnt worry him more by telling him what jake does to me.
"yeah dad im ok." i tried to look genuinly ok as i sat up in bed. he was so tired he believed my terible lie. "well ok then ,good night bells." he said
before drowsily going back to his room. i heard his
door close . i glance over at my clock, it read 3:58 am. edward is never coming back so the sooner i forget him the better.
i can do anything about what jacob does to me now that edwards gone. jacob was the only one that actualy loves me. he only does what he
does to show his love right? i shouldnt be thinking this, jacob loves me... he would never leave me.i laid back down and closed my eyes, what if i
said edwards name in my sleep? oh no... what if jacob was listening? oh dear god please let it have bin any wolf but jake to be on patrol near me
tonight. i sighed deeply.
i would have to wait till tomaro and find out. people would get a little suspicious if he breaks another one of my bones. i cant keep blaming things
on clumsiness.
i took a soothing breath and fell asleep.
the next morning.
"bella! theres a couple doughnuts on the table for you." i groaned, morning already. jacob would expect me at his house by noon. i got up and
went
to take shower but i examined myself first. i looked at the right side of my stomache. the bruise there was yellowing know as was the one on my
calf. my arms had bruises to. i remember when he gave me these last week
"i saw you wereing those shorts and that shirt!.. bella you cant show that much skin to anyone but me!" he grabed my arm and threw me against a wall,
bruising both arms in the process. i slid to the floor. "know only i can see your arms." he kicked my calf a few times. it hurt like hell know that he was a
werewolf. i was crying know. "bella..." he cradled me in his arms. "bella im doing this because i love you." he told me that everytime he hurt me.
"i know..." it was true right?
i glanced at my back as far as i could see. there was a nasty looking deep purple bruise the shape of a foot there. i sighed and took a shower.
i walked down stairs and saw 3 doughnuts on the table. my mouth watered. of course i couldnt eat any of it. jacob told me i was getting fat. i
looked down at my stomach. i could never forgive my self if i got any fatter than 110 pounds, jacob was a model and i... im just not.
i walked over to the doughnuts and thew them away ruefully.
i opened the fridge and took out a water bottle and chugged it down. atleast this would keep me from puking again. i trudged back up the stairs,
nearly tripping on my sprained ankle. i
wish alice could see me. but know that jacob was the alpha due to sams death, he always kept someone near here to keep her from seeing me.
i looked into my closet and selected long jeans and a long sleeve black t-shirt. i looked at the time. 11:20. well i might as well head over to la push.
i grabbed my truck keys and got in my rusty old truck, i turned the key in the ignition and drove a long quiet slow drive .
eventualy i pulled into jakes drive way. i got out and went up to his door an didnt bother to nock. i walked thro the house, it seemed so empty
know that his father died. i
didnt even know how he died because jake never talked of him.
"bella... "i heard jake yell from his room. well know is when i find out wether he was on patrollast night or not.
"coming." i said while walking up the stairs t his room.
he was sprawled across the bed and looked sleepy. he waved me over and i sat beside him. he rapt his arm around my waist and pulled me closer
and closer. slowly he began to squez a little to hard and i accidentaly let a whimper escape my lips and he tightened his grip then looked at me.
"bella i heard you last night, you were crying out his name..." he said sitting up staight and pulling me into his lap. "i thot i told you to never speak
his name again." he had both arms around me by know and it was seriously starting to hurt. he just stayed like that for what seemed like hours
and all the while suffocating me in his grip.
when it got to be dark he finaly released me and threw me to the ground. i felt soo bad. jacob did nothing but love me . all i ever did was hurt him over and over again.
i slid down to the floor as he got up. he kicked me in the ribs a couple times then ran out of the house. but not before he whispered, " why do you
torture me so?"
i felt absolutly horrible, i didnt deserve jake, not in the least. i cried as i walked out to my truck to go home. i could already feel the bruises all around my torso.
today was sunday meaning that tomaro, i would have to face school again. i drove home in silence but when i passed the old coffee shop there
was a croud so i parked the truck in one of the few remaining parking spots and walked up to angela and jessica.
"bella hey!" jessica screached at me i nodded. "hey, so whats up with the croud?" i asked feeling a bit normal just talking to my friends.
"bell this REALY hot guy just moved in to town and he got a job playing the piano at this place and he is shall i say? AMAZING!" she was talking no
stop so i just nodded and listened like a good friend should.
then i realized that everything had gotten alot quieter as i thot to myself. then my mind went blank and i heard the most beutiful song in my entire
life, chopins raindrop prelude. i knew this song because it was the one my mother played for me to put me to sleep when i was a little girl. the
song filled my heart and all of a sudden the music stopped. and everyone was looking at me. i blushed not relizing why. then someone took my
hand and i saw the most beutiful man i had eer seen in my entire life. he lifted my hand to his lips and kissed it softly. the croud gasped.
but all i could see was his perfect dark hair falling around his face so magnificently, and his sharp jaw. then i saw how broad his shoulders were. i
was probably staring when he interupted my thots. "good evening miss, i am aro, i would be honored to know your name. " he took a step closer. i
was so scared he would hurt me but strangely enough all i did was answer. "its... um, bella, bella swan." i said shakily. he reached for my cheek, i
flinched away, taking my hand too. i thot he was going to hit me, probably not. but if jacob found out he would murder this guy and i did not want
anyone to get hurt on my account. so i turned and jogged back to my truck and left everyone staring at me. i was beet red i knew it. but at the
moment all i wanted was to be by myself. away from people i could hurt.
i arrived home at exactly 9:00. im glad that tonight charlie was planing on eating with seths mom. actualy hes bin eating there almost every night
now. wich makes it eisier to hide my not eating.
i grabbed a water bottle from the fridge and a vitamin from the cabnet above the sink. then i headed to bed. i know i wont be going to the coffee
shop anymore. i cant become friends with any guys. jake would be furious.
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