Hello, I am ShadowKnight49 Productions, and this is the… oh, forget it.

So I watched… you know, I'm not gonna bother writing the name because it takes too much time. So anyways, thing is I finished watching and felt as if something was missing (and for that matter, the last episode was a bit confusing for an 'ending'). So, heck, I wrote a bit of a story and added my ships in (i.e. Sadao/Emi and Urushihara/Suzuno [I just like them because they never seem to care about anything]). So here we are with 'The Zombie Lord is a Matchmaker' (name is still of subject to be changed).

Disclaimer: I don't own TDIAPT. That belongs to Dengeki Bunko, creators of some of the best anime. If I did, there would be season 2 already and Sadao/Emi would be canon.

Chapter 1: The Devil and the Hero Become Tutors

Sadao's POV

Sometimes I wonder if there are other worlds out there besides Earth and Ente Isla.

Well, that one was obvious. More specifically, do they know other worlds exist?

My answer came that day when Lloyd Sissorn wanted to help me with neighborhood cleanup…

"Anybody need help?" I called to the people who were with me cleaning trash of the sidewalks.

The other twenty-five people cleaning the streets, all between ages twenty and seventy in human years, all thanked me and said no.

One guy came up from behind me and asked, "Do you need help, yourself?"

I jumped and spun around.

He was about my registered age, a few centimeters shorter than me. He sported pale skin and night-black hair that was about the length of mine and shaggy. He wore a black hoodie, hood up, and for a split second I thought he was Death thanks to that. His blue jeans were torn at the knees and he wore strange black combat boots. Most interestingly, his eyes were amethyst violet.

I became immediately suspicious, and sniffed. There was no scent of celestial force, and he was definitely not a demon. I would sense it if he was.

But still…

The guy frowned and asked in a casual voice that sounded slightly more interested than Urushihara's normal voice, "Are you okay? You're looking at me funny."

I shook my head and gave him a smile.

"Sorry," I said. "I was trying to figure out why you scared me like that."

He cocked his head to the side, confused by the comment, and then shrugged.

"I do that for some reason," he said.

He looked me up and down.

"You're low on money, are you?" he asked.

I blinked and replied, "Erm… yes. How did you know?"

"The way they walk, how they dress… it's all in the markings."

"Where are you going here?"

"I can pay you."

"I already have an honest job at MgRonald's."

"No. Actually, I'm looking for someone like you to tutor my sister."

That got to me. Curse my kind human heart (well, no, not really).

"What do you mean?" I asked.

The guy frowned solemnly.

"My sister," he said. "She… has a problem with her brain. She's rude and loud, but she seems to be quiet when others tell her to, unlike me. I want someone to teach her to be polite… kindly."

"So what you're saying is…" I started.

"If you teach my sister how to act appropriately, I'll pay you. And you don't even have to quit your job. You can just do it before or after your shift. Heck, it doesn't even have to be daily. But I'll be paying you like you are."

I considered my options.

"I'm going with you," Emi said flatly.

"What?!" I demanded. "Why?!"

"Chances are you're going to fudge this up with your antics. So I'm going along to make sure you don't do something stupid."

I scowled, searching for a comeback.

I had come back after my meeting with the guy, who was named Lloyd. I asked Urushihara and Ashiya for their opinions, and then Suzuno when she was done cleaning our clothes.

And of course the great 'Hero' turned out to be stalking us, so I let her in.

Ashiya stood up at Emi's words and shouted, "I cannot allow you to speak to my lord like that!"

Emi waved a hand and said, "Say what you want, demon. You know yourself that if Sadao does this himself, chances are he'll make the poor girl go crazier and get fired."

She then turned to me and asked, "How desperate are you to decide to get paid for training someone's little sister?"

I scowled deeper and said, "For one, it's not 'training.' That's just rude. Second, I'm just teaching her proper manners."

"So you think you'd be the best for the job? You may be friendly, but you don't know 'manners.'"

"I think you meant to say that to Urushihara," I said, smiling a bit.

Urushihara looked up from his computer and shouted, "Shut up!"

Although, I had to admit, Emi had a point. If this girl was misbehaving, Emi would be better at teaching her proper behavior. Suzuno, Urushihara, and Chiho (via texting) all thought Emi should go with me.

And that was before it turned out she was stalking us.

Emi smirked at Urushihara before turning back to me. She said in cold, clipped words, "You. Need. Me."

I sighed.

Luckily, Lloyd lived a block away.

The house was as plain as could be. Boring brown walls and a tan roof. It had two floors and one garage. The door appeared to be mahogany but looked beaten down by rain.

Emi and I were ten meters away when I heard the shouting.

It sounded like a storm of wild screams and crashing, and I could hear Lloyd shouting at someone… his sister, I'm guessing.

Emi and I exchanged a frown, and she quickly looked away.

I went up to the door and rang the doorbell. I couldn't hear it, but suddenly the house went quiet.

"That's them," I heard Lloyd say.

Silence.

"Could you go open the door?"

Footsteps were approaching. Both Emi and I took a cautious step back for the (figurative) demon approaching.

The door opened.

The girl was about fifteen years old, five-ten, and on the skinny side. Like Lloyd, she had messy night-black hair and ridiculously pale skin. In addition, she wore a black hoodie. Unlike her older brother, however, her hair went to her waist, a purple skirt went on instead of pants, and her combat boots went up to her knees. Her eyes were an unfocused brown, giving me the idea that Lloyd's violet eyes were merely contacts.

The girl stared at us, and her left eye drifted off. She bit her bottom lip.

"Lizzie?" Lloyd asked. "Would you let them inside, please?"

Lizzie turned to the right, where I assumed Lloyd was standing. She stomped once and shouted, "No!"

I heard a groan and Lloyd came into view, grabbing his sister by the shoulders and dragging her out of the way as she kicked and screamed.

He smiled at me awkwardly and said, "Hey, Sadao."

I stepped in and took a look around. The place would be nice looking if it wasn't a mess. The tiled floor was covered with torn napkins and food. A rug lay upside-down on the oak stairs. Some of the curtains on a window near the door were torn.

In other words, I actually preferred my apartment over this dump, as spacy as it was.

Lloyd turned to Emi and frowned.

"I didn't expect anyone else," he said.

Then he smiled mischievously.

"Let me guess, Sadao," he said. "Your girlfriend wouldn't let you go without her?"

"Sh-shut up!" Emi shouted, who had been looking at Lizzie carefully a little bit ago. "I would rather die than date him!"

"Now that's just harsh," I commented.

Emi turned to Lloyd and bowed.

"My name is Emi Yusa," she introduced. "I came to assist Sadao with your sister. May I ask what she's afflicted with?"

Lloyd blinked at the word 'afflicted' and then said quietly, "It's called 'Vryxxitis.' She's the first to get it. It causes her to hate everybody she's related to while making her unable to learn from them."

"Then how does she know how to talk?"

"My friends taught her until they got close enough for her to hate them."

"So, what are you trying to offer?" I asked.

"I believe some mental issues can be overcome with the right teachings. So I want you, and your girlfriend, I suppose (Emi growled low in her throat), to teach her to act properly and not be so rude to others. I'll even throw in my life if you teach her to love me."

Lizzie, who had been quiet and solemn a bit ago, grew angry all of a sudden and started slamming her fists weakly into her brother's chest and shouted, "I hate you! I hate you!"

Those punches may not have hurt, but the words seemed to hurt more to Lloyd. At those words, he seemed to miserable I decided to do this for free.

"I'll do anything," I told him.

Emi added, "I concur."

Lloyd smiled thankfully and said, "Good luck. And thanks."