This fic is set in a slightly alternative universe, the main difference being Maes is alive. Few other minor differences but nothing that really requires to be explained.

Enjoy

Their first night had been rushed, that's the only thing that Mustang regretted about that night. But even know, that events of that day were seared into his brain like a brand heated by his own flame.

It was raining…

Edward found himself more enthralled every moment he spent turning the pages of this book. A truly remarkable science journal from the perspective of a science student studying the strange markings of Xerces. Not that the science in the student's study was any good, but the photos were well documented and the arrays were far less deteriorated than what they were today.

"Hey Ed, how are the books?"

Edward glanced up from the piles of books now overflowing the library study table. He'd finally gotten the staff to agree to section off this table as his. So now he didn't have to worry about putting all the books away and getting the back out when he returned the next day.

"Hughes." Ed greeted warmly setting aside his book. "What can I help you with?"

"Actually Ed, I've come to talk to you about some. Well about some stuff that if your mother were here, she would have spoken to you about it a long time ago."

Edward sat stiffly in his seat, allowing Mae's to sit across from him. Edward never talked about his mother, in fact the little that anyone knew was that she had died when Ed and Al were young. Even Mustang didn't know much more beyond that, except for the failed mutation.

"It's ok to be happy."

"Maes I," Ed sighed and ran a hand through his hair. "I really don't want to hear this."

"Edward you've got a lot of dark stuff behind you. I know that. I don't know how you lost your arm Ed, or how your brother came to be in his current state. But you're allowed to be happy."

He looked away for a moment, across the library that was slowly filtering out. "Maes, what is this all about?"

"I think you know Ed." Hughes leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms. "I think you also know that you're not the only one i'm worried about."

Edward became very still, begging his face to give nothing away. "Is that so?"

"Yes," Maes said smiling. "A very dear friend of mine is also in need of some happiness."

"And this man," Edward spoke low as to give nothing away. "Do you honestly think that i'm the best thing for him?"

"I do."

"And what if." Edward paused and glanced around to make sure no one was watching as he leaned in across the table towards Maes. "What if I told you that I really had done a terrible thing." He whispered glancing into Maes eyes before his own shame forced him to look away. "What if I had done something truly unforgivable. Something so awful that I believe it may have...tarnished anything good I had left. Something so awful that it forced my little brother into a suit of armor and took nearly half my body as payment. What if I had done something, taboo." Edward's words were low and harshly whispered. "What if even my mother, was ashamed of me. Would you still think me worthy of your 'dear friend'?"

Maes leaned back, perhaps he was putting the pieces together or perhaps he was rethinking his view of Edward entirely. "What if this man felt the same way about his own deeds?"

Edward scoffed and leaned back in his chair almost defeated.

"Edward, Happiness isn't a consolation prize for the nicest person or the holiest person. It's for those brave enough to grasp it."

"What if I'm not brave enough."

"Oh I think you are." Maes got to his feet and silently pushed in his chair. 'I've got to head home. Elicia is waiting for me." Maes got a few paces away before he turned around. "Maybe just try it for a day Ed, no one will try and stop you I promise."

Edward sat in the library, long after it was closed. Thinking over what Hughes had said. It wasn't long until he found himself walking the long streets of Central under a very dark moonless sky. The rain still in the air clung to his automail like sweat, leaving the cool air to chill his false limbs like ice. At least he would assume, since he couldn't actually feel it.

He found himself, like he knew he would be; drawn towards the object causing so much trouble. The item of his affection, Roy Mustang. And yes he knew all about how wrong it was, how inappropriate it was and how dangerous. But it didn't stop him. But maybe he didn't want to be stopped.

But maybe he didn't expect Roy to answer after the first knock either.

"Fullmetal?" Mustang asked curiously. "Is something wrong?"

"Oh, um no." Edward dropped his hand to his side. "Your, uh library. You said I was free to stop by. Uh; anytime." Edward was flailing for a reason now. Why was he here, what did he want. He didn't know.

"Oh of course, come in." Roy stepped aside allowing him to enter.

The Colonel's house was huge. A wide open living room with couches and bookshelves, a fireplace obviously. A kitchen to the far left and a star case against the wall on the far right.

"It's upstairs, I'll show you."

Edward followed his commanding officer up the stairs silently, to a door off the main hall. The library was large,, impressive even. Tall bookshelves that were filled to the brim. None of that useless junk sitting on the shelves like globes or busts. Just literature, Ed liked it. A soft looking chair and lounging couch sat in the middle of the room split by a long coffee table that held a single lamp.

"Cozy" Edward observed moving along the volumes that sat at eye level. "Lot's of fire alchemy."

"Well what did you expect?" Mustang asked coming up behind him. "Flame Alchemist and all."

Ed hummed in agreement but refused to look over his shoulder.

"Help yourself to whatever you like, I'll just be down the hall." His breath warmed the side of Edward's cheek, and then he was gone. Leaving Edward to his thoughts once more.

He pulled a few volumes to the side, flipping open the covers of those that looked interesting. But nothing held his interest. Nothing held his attention like the dark haired Colonel down the hall. "This is absurd." he muttered to himself, running a hand through the bangs of his hair. "He doesn't...he couldn't."

Ed grabbed at his coat in frustration, shedding the red fabric across the back of the couch; followed by his short black coat. He sat down on the couch and placed his head between two hands, jerking at the chill of the metal.

A snap followed by a flash of fire. "Cold?" Ed asked leaning against the door frame, one glove on his hand.

"Uh, yea." Edward said straightening up. "The rain, it's hell on automail. Plus the wind."

Roy tilted his head. "Really? I thought automail was invincible or something.' He crossed the room quietly, assessing the metal limb.

Ed scoffed. "No, far from it. Automail is metal after all." He said holding his hand out as Roy sat next to him to inspect. He touched the metal palm and frowned.

"You're freezing." the fire grew brighter as if it had been offended by the comment.

Ed chuckled. "No, actually i'm not. That's a common mistake. A lot of people think that because the limbs interact with the nerves in my arm that I can still experience touch and temperature. Far from it." Ed said slowly as he trailed off. "There are mornings I wake up confused, it's dark in the room or i'm exhausted. And I think someone's taken my arm, or something stupid like that." Edward laughed awkwardly. "Every move I make with automail is a conscious move, it's not reflex like it would be with flesh."

Roy's brow became furrowed for a moment. "So, you can't feel anything?"

"Not unless the arm's been damaged severely, it aggravates the port and sometimes it's as bad as losing it the first time."

Roy paled. "But you get it damaged all the time, you walk around Central like it's nothing.'

Ed nodded turning his palm over and flexing his fingers. "You should see my poker face."

"Can I?" Roy asked holding out his hand.

"What, touch it?" Ed asked surprised.

"Yes Fullmetal, I want to touch it."

"Yea, um; really?" Ed was almost confused, placing his metal palm against Mustang's skin.

"What, surprised?" He asked chuckling as he ran his fingertips over Ed's hand. Examining the metal.

"Well yea, it's kind of ugly."

"Not ugly." Roy insisted, holding his hand like it was precious.

So Ed kissed him. He didn't lung forward exactly, but he was quick enough to catch Roy by surprise. This kiss was firm enough for Ed to taste Roy's lips but soft enough to not be called violent. And Roy kissed back. For a split second he titled his head and parted his lips, but just as quickly he pulled away.

"Edward, I; no we can't."

"Roy." Edward said focusing all of his attention into two onyx eyes. "Please."

"Ed, you know; if you ask. I'll give you anything." Roy whispered moving his hands up to Ed's face. "But this. What we're doing. What happens when we make up?"

"You're making this to complicated Roy." Ed said shaking his head. "I'm not asking for tomorrow i'm asking for tonight. Right now."

The second kiss was sweeter, and the way Roy held Edward against him was something neither of them would ever forget the feeling of.

The first time they made love was in a library.

But if Roy had known what would have happened to that tomorrow that he gave away so freely, he would have not made that deal as quickly as he did.

If he had known that by the next sunset Ed would have sacrificed himself; restoring Alphonse to his flesh self once more. Leaving Edward a missing case file open upon his desk.

Roy would have given him that tomorrow.

He would have given him everything.