Ok this was actually my first attempt at any fanfiction! A scary thought to be sure. But I was feeling depressed and a little upset so I wrote this one night in the middle of winter when I was 17. I recently found it and I am going to take a crack at revising it. I am keeping it pretty much the way I found it only a few thing here and there now you can see the difference in my writing from then till now. ^_^ Hope you all like it! It's from Serena's pov and it's the first and last first person pov I will probably due, but then again you never know. ~_^
Disclaimer: I don't own Sailor Moon or anything really cool like that. As I said before its not worth suing me over it I lost my paper clip and my friend still hasn't returned my rubber chicken. :P
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And the Snow Still Falls
Wind whips against the frost covered windows making the weathered wood groan. It is so cold outside…much like my broken heart.
Fat snowflakes flutter out of the icy heavens, made visible only by the street lamp on the corner. My eyes glaze over as I lose myself in the icy darkness of the night.
"I can't believe that Darien doesn't love me anymore!" My heart screams.
"I can." My mind replies bitterly. "Who would want a ditzy, crybaby like you. You can't even pay attention in school let alone have a meaningful conversation with him. And lets talk about the problem of breathing and walking at the same time. How on earth are you going to hold his interest if all you do is pig out on junk food and read comics!"
"NO!" my heart screams in denial as it tears in two again and again. But my mind keeps running through my list of flaws. Starting with school then onto my personality, my habits, my looks, how I act as a scout, and even going as far as my taste in décor. Rabbits and moons, no wonder they all think I'm incompetent.
"Serena are you going to bed soon?"
Luna's soft voice startles me out of my reverie
(Sigh.)
"Yea Luna be right there."
My tone must have betrayed my thoughts because Luna looks at me
Worriedly, concern showing in her red eyes.
"Everything alright Serena? You sound kind of down."
Plastering a fake smile on my face I muster the most cheerful tone I can muster.
"Oh everything's fine Luna!"
I sound false even to my own ears. My voice is strained and thin, almost to high even for my usual self. Quickly I come up with the most plausible excuse.
"I'm just a little tired. I'll be better in the morning."
Seeming pacified with that answer Luna smiles at me briefly before she curls up onto the bed while I turn back to the darkened window, watching the snowflakes dance on the wind. Slowly a tear runs unchecked out of the corner of my eye.
"So many memories," my heart sighs, "most them a struggle between good and evil with you by my side. Oh Darien what happened to us?" More tears stream down my face, angrily I brush them away.
"Serena how do you expect to get up on time if you stay up half the night."
"Coming Luna."
Slowly pulling back the covers I slip in between the sheets dreading the thought of sleeping. All my dreams are of him. When we were happy and in…love. That word seems so hollow now. Once it was full of life and hope and now… "Sigh."… It has lost its shine, its sparkle. "Why me?" I want to yell. Is it my destiny to suffer, to take on all the worlds pain, what sin did I commit to deserve this? "You dared to love." My mind replies again. Sinking deeper into the depression that has been my life the past few weeks my mind replays the fight Rei and I had earlier that night.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Flashback ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
(Back at the Cherry Hill Temple)
"Sailor Moon where were you!!?"
Rei screams at me. I can practically see the enchanted fire in her eyes.
"I was right their Rei I couldn't very well use my moon scepter while that… that, thing had a hold of Lita!"
My mind is clouded by anger now. Why is she yelling at me? It wasn't like she did anything about it either.
"Well if you been on time maybe Lita would never been in that position."
This screaming contest is beginning to get to me. Slowly I take a deep breath to reign in my emotions before I continue.
"First off there is no on time for a battle. Secondly, every one of us has to drop everything we are doing when that communicator beeps and haul our asses to be where ever this fight is taking place. Just because I happened to across town today didn't mean that I took my sweet time getting there!!"
Rage was boiling inside me now. What right does she have to yell at me? This glorified priestess; I'm the one who finally defeated that thing!
"Could have fooled me."
Rei snapped. I could tell she was getting to the point of wanting to push me over the edge.
"And where were you across town huh? Knocking on Darien's door begging him to take you back!"
That was the last straw! Without even thinking my hand flies towards her.
*SMACK*
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ End Flashback ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Before I knew what I had done Rei had fled. I knew she was hurting, letting her anger out on me. Letting out her frustrations on her inability to help Lita. But when she went for that jibe I lost it. I, Serena Tuskino, just slapped my best friend. Rolling over on my side I stare at the picture of us,
Darien and I at the park, we were so happy then. Slowly I reach out my fingers tracing his face one last time. Then ever so slowly I lay the picture face down.
"You have caused too much misery in my life Darien." I whisper. Now I had hit one of my best friends because she dared speak the truth.
"You were right Darien our love was like rose." I cringe at the memory of his words. " And this rose just lost its last petal."
I whisper to my self.
With my heart-breaking acceptance in hand I curl up into a ball.
No more, I can't take anymore. Sighing I roll over, away from the picture. My grief stricken gaze drifts back to my window.
The snow still falls so gently against the pitch-black night.
"Tomorrow I will make it up to you Rei."
I vow to no one in particular.
"Tomorrow I will make it up to you."
My mind echoes that statement over and over till the first rays of dawn streak through the sky. Looking through my frosted window at the now multicolored horizon I sigh as I heave my body out of bed. Padding lightly over to the window I lean my forehead against the frozen glass. Glancing back at my sleeping cat I whisper.
"Look Luna. The snow still falls."