Disclaimer: I don't own Bleach, but I own all the pillows and cushions!
Matsumoto's 10th division pillow fight! A Bleach fanfic.
It was a dreadfully boring day for Matsumoto with Captain Hitsugaya out in the real world on some secret official business. Pulling out another sake bottle from under her captain's desk, Matsumoto sat on the couch in Hitsugaya's office lazing around luxuriously thinking of what she could do to pass the time, ASIDE from her paperwork.
Getting off the couch listlessly, Matsumoto heard a pillow drop off the couch. Bending over to pick it up, she felt Hinamori's Reiatsu approach followed by Izuru and Renji. Picking up the pillow with a sneaky grin, Matsumoto hid behind the door as Hinamori walked in.
"Hitsugaya-taichou! We have the reports you requested… Ahmph!" Hinamori shouted as Matsumoto caught her with a pillow to the face.
"Matsumoto-fukutaichou! What are you doing!?" Izuru gasped as he deposited his load of reports on Hitsugaya's desk.
"Pillow fight!!!!" Renji yelled, grabbing a pillow and smacking Izuru from behind.
As everybody armed themselves with a pillow, Kurotsuchi Nemu walked in!
"Matsumoto? Yachiru wants to know if you will be attending tomorrow's Female Shinigami association meeting…" Nemu said as she bowed at the door.
"Yes I will!" Matsumoto said as Hinamori took advantage of her distraction and attacked her midsection.
"Join us Nemu-san!" Renji yelled as he brought the pillow down on Nemu's head.
"I apologize. I have to return to help Kurotsuchi-taichou with his research." Nemu said as she bowed before walking out the door silently.
Attacking Matsumoto from behind, Izuru forced Matsumoto into Renji who hit her as she was flung forwards into him! "Not fair!" Matsumoto cried as Hinamori leapt up and hit her chest.
As the door opened again, everyone froze to see that nobody was there! "Die Hisagi-san!" Renji yelled, swinging his pillow at nothing in particular, causing an invisible Hisagi to suddenly appear and fly backwards from the sudden attack!
"Oh! Hisagi-san! Stop hiding your Reiatsu!" Hinamori said, dropping her pillow and helping Hisagi to his feet.
"Never let your guard down Hinamori!" Hisagi yelled happily as he picked up the dropped cushion and attacked her legs gently before using shunpo to get into the office in time to attack a startled Matsumoto from behind.
Running back into the room frantically, Hinamori forgot to check her surroundings and was hit in the face just when she ran through the door by Matsumoto again!
"Stop it Matsumoto!" Hinamori squealed as Matsumoto continued to attack her.
"What's going on!?" Rukia yelled as she ran into the room, "I heard Hinamori screaming and… Ooomph!" Rukia said, Renji attacking hitting her with a pillow before she could finish her sentence.
"Renji!!!" Rukia yelled, going red in the face as she picked up a cushion from the nearly barren sofa and proceeded to chase Renji around the room, holding the pillow above her head in a comedic fashion.
"Renji, when I get you, I'll kill ya!" Rukia yelled, still chasing a constantly dodging and fleeing Renji.
"Oi Kuchiki-san!" Izuru called out.
"What!?... Eeeyagh!" Rukia yelled as she ran straight into Hinamori's pillow.
"A noble uses proper grammar and watches where they're going~!" Izuru called out in a Urahara-like voice.
Stopping in her tracks, Rukia gave Izuru a stunned stare giving Matsumoto the chance to swing her pillow and getting a free hit before running off!
"Izuru!!!" Rukia screamed, changing her target from Renji to Izuru in a matter of seconds.
"Ahhh! Here she comes! Get her Abarai!" Izuru yelled as he ran away from a rampant Rukia.
Running up to Rukia, Renji tackled her to the ground before he proceeded to attack her with attacks all over her upper body and head.
"Oi! Cheap! Not the face!" Rukia yelled as she used her pillow as a shield.
Meanwhile, in the real world, Hitsugaya was at Urahara's shop as a last stop before he headed back to Soul Society, and the unsuspecting pillow fight in his own office.
"Urahara-san, what is this?" Hitsugaya asked as he gingerly picked up a recently shaked Pepsi can as if it would explode (literally and figuratively)
"Oh that? Hitsugaya-taichou? You wouldn't be interested in that... Humans call them soft drinks or sodas. It's simply put, a mixture of human chemicals with gas in it to give it a bite to its taste."
"Soft drinks huh... What do they taste like?"
"It's alright Hitsugaya-taichou! You can have it for free if you want, they're really cheap and since you're curious you can have it."
"Huh?! You're serious Urahara-san!?"
"Of course Hitsugaya! Feel free to drink it if you want..." Urahara said buoyantly, opening his fan and covering his face.
Inserting his finger into the ring, Hitsugaya opened the can to find a fountain of Pepsi flowing out the recently opened can!
"What the!?" Hitsugaya gasped, leaping backwards as he dropped the can.
"Oh! So sorry, Hitsugaya-san! You must've picked one of the cans that Jinta was shaking earlier! Here take this one!" Urahara laughed lightly, pulling out another can and opening it himself before passing it to Hitsugaya.
Taking the can gingerly, Hitsugaya shook his head. "No thanks Urahara. I have to get back to Soul Society. There's no telling what my lieutenant may be up to." (pillow fights for instance)
"Consider that problem solved Hitsugaya-san! You can use my own Senkaimon to go back to Soul Society!"
"Ohhhh~ You mean the one that uses a converter to convert everything to Reishi right? Alright, then i'll take this with me!" Hitsugaya said happily, separating from his gigai and taking the can from his gigai before walking with Urahara to the Senkaimon.
"Oh and one more warning!"
"Huh?"
"After arriving in Soul Society, be VERY careful with your drink!"
"Why?"
"After the soft drink is converted to Reishi, if you spill it on any of your clothing, the soda will be IMPOSSIBLE to remove! So be careful!"
"I understand. Thanks Urahara!"
"Thank you so much Hitsugaya-taichou! See you again!" Urahara said with a jovial wave as Hitsugaya returned to Soul Society.
Feeling her captain's Reiatsu approaching the office, Matsumoto hid behind the door signalling for everybody else to hide. As the door opened, Hitsugaya walked in sipping his Pepsi just as Matsumoto leaped from her hiding place and smacked him with the pillow, spilling the Pepsi all over his captain's haori!
At that precise moment in time, during Yamamoto's tea session, Byakuya's calligraphy club meeting and Unohana's flower arrangement class, a loud scream could be heard throughout all of Sereitei. "MATSUMOTO!!!!!!!!!!!"
