The Persuaders!
I'm Still Here
By Lucky_Ladybug
Notes: The characters are not mine and the story is! This takes place immediately after the episode Angie, Angie, because there was definitely a lot of raw hurt in that episode that needed soothing. And despite being the tenth one aired, it was only the fourth filmed; Brett and Danny's friendship was still very new at that point. That's an era I wanted to explore a little more.
The night that Angie died, Danny disappeared.
Judge Fulton wasn't that concerned. While he knew this entire case had been a serious blow to Danny, he was sure that Danny wanted to be alone and had just gone off somewhere to think . . . or maybe to get drunk and try to forget.
Brett betted on the latter. And while perhaps once not long ago he would have simply believed Danny's declaration that he was alright and left him alone, now he just didn't feel right about leaving Danny to his own devices tonight. Losing a loved one in any way was a painful blow, but losing one because he had decided to become a hitman was something Brett could not even fathom. He wondered if Danny had managed to wrap his mind around it yet. He also wondered and worried what Danny would do when he did.
So Brett spent the evening and part of the night combing London's nightclubs. Several times he almost thought he had found Danny, only to be disappointed that it was someone else. But when he actually did find Danny, there was no mistake.
"Oh, this has been a great evening," a very drunk Danny was giggling to two girls at his table. "You know why I came in here tonight? I wanted to forget about an old friend of mine. He died today."
"How awful!" exclaimed one of the girls, falling back.
"Nah, not really," Danny said with a wave of his hand. "I knew him when we were kids. I realized today that he was always a little 'off.' He became a hitman and tried to use me to help him get away after pulling another job. The way he wanted to 'get away' was for me to kill him. I couldn't do it and he ended up getting killed by the guy who hired him." He was laughing again. "Isn't that hilarious? And this other guy I met not long ago, this stuffy British lord, he didn't like my friend from the start. I was really mad at him for it, but I guess now I know why he didn't like him. He must've picked up on what I didn't." His hand trembled and a cloud passed over his features. "That's really funny, isn't it?"
The girls looked at each other, clearly not sure how to handle the situation.
Brett stepped forward, taking hold of Danny by the shoulders. "It isn't funny at all, Daniel," he said gravely. "That's all, girls. You can leave now."
The girls got up from the table, clearly relieved. Danny, however, was perturbed and frustrated.
"Come on, girls," he pleaded, reaching out for the nearest one. "You don't have to listen to him. Don't go; the evening's still young."
"It's almost midnight and you're making the young ladies highly awkward," Brett answered. "You've had more than enough to drink. It's time to go."
Danny stood, but pulled away from him. "I don't want to!" he snarled, spinning around to face Brett. "Why do you always have to interfere in my life? I was a lot happier before I ever met you or the judge or started trying to be Batman!" He shoved Brett back, causing him to stumble into the back of a chair at the next table. The occupant jumped a mile and whirled to look.
Brett gave her an apologetic look and turned back to Danny. "Daniel, you're drunk," he said with an edge to his voice. "I'm not going to attempt speaking with you in that condition."
"Fine!" Danny shot back. "Then just leave me alone, will you?"
Brett advanced on him again. "You're not in any condition for that, either. I'm going to take you back to my apartment and sober you up."
"I don't want to sober up. Don't you get that?" Danny flung Brett's arms away from him when Brett tried to grab him.
"Believe it or not, I understand exactly," Brett replied. "Of course you don't want to sober up; then you'll have to face the truth about Angie and yourself."
"So go away and let me wallow in my drunkenness until tomorrow, okay?" Danny started to turn away.
"By tomorrow you might be in jail or worse, the hospital." Brett took hold of Danny's arm.
"Good!" Danny pulled free again and proceeded to storm off.
Not about to give up, Brett chased after him. "Daniel, I have been up and down all over London searching for you for the better part of the evening. I have no intention of leaving here without you!"
"And who told you to do that, Your Lordship?" Danny shot back. "The judge?" He crossed his arms and rested them against the nearest doorframe, then leaned forward against them.
"The judge didn't have anything to do with it," Brett answered. "He wanted me to just leave you to it."
Danny slowly turned to face him, honestly surprised. "Really?" he said. "He wanted you to leave me alone?"
"Yes." Brett wondered if he dare start to relax.
"But you didn't." Danny pushed himself away from the wall, visibly moved and sobered. "Okay. Let's go."
Relieved, Brett kept an arm around Danny's shoulders and led him through the door. In the nightclub, everyone else was also relieved.
xxxx
Danny was silent on the way back to Brett's apartment. That was fine with Brett; he would prefer to talk once they stopped. But when Danny continued to be mute once they arrived and Brett gave him a cup of coffee to help sober him up, Brett began to be concerned again. "Daniel?" he asked.
Danny looked up at him. "I was just thinking about the differences between you and Angie," he said. "I genuinely cared about Angie from the old days. He was probably my best friend back then. But I think I was just the means to an end for him. He thought he could rely on me to do anything for him, even to kill him so he wouldn't have to go to jail."
Brett frowned and sat down across from him. "Did you really make such an oath when you were children?"
"Oh, it was something like that, yeah." Danny took a sip of coffee. "But we were just stupid, crazy kids who thought we knew how the world worked when we really didn't. Angie was the one who came up with that oath, you know? I just went along without really thinking that it would ever be necessary to go through with it. And I grew out of it when I grew up and got out of the slums. Angie . . . never really did."
"I see." Brett hesitated. "Daniel, the reason why I didn't like Angie was because I sensed something you didn't. I sensed that you were going to be hurt."
Danny looked down and nodded. "Angie was just using me all along. But you came to help me out when you really didn't have to. That wasn't just because the judge wanted him, was it?"
"No, it wasn't."
"And then you spent hours looking for me tonight even though the judge didn't want you to." Danny looked up at him. "Angie never would've done that, not unless he wanted me for something. It was always himself that he cared about more than anything else."
Brett reached across the space between them, laying a hand on Danny's shoulder. "I'm sorry, Daniel."
"No, don't be." Danny set the coffee aside. "You were right, that you can't go back again. So I don't want to think about the past any longer. I want to think about the future."
"Did you . . . mean what you said, about being happier before you met me or Judge Fulton?" Brett asked.
Guilt washed over Danny's face. "I meant it at the time I said it because I was just so angry and hurt about Angie," he admitted. "It felt like everybody was using me: Angie, the judge, people I'd met who wanted me to be a stepping stone to their success. . . . And I didn't know if you'd start using me or not."
"Trust me, Daniel, I don't need to use you to get something I want," Brett said flatly.
Danny half-smirked. "Yeah." He looked down, studying the coffee mug as he tried to work out what he wanted to say. "Actually, before this mess with Angie, I was kind of starting to like working for the judge with you. Maybe after what I said, you won't even want to work with me anymore. That'd be a really great end to this messed-up day," he said sadly, sarcastically. "If I came away from one friendship that probably never was only to ruin a friendship that . . . actually could be."
Brett was silent for a moment, causing Danny to cringe in dread when he finally spoke. "I've learned to never take too seriously what a man says when drunk. Especially if he's drunk because of a tragedy that's happened in his life."
That brought Danny's gaze up in awe. "You mean it's okay?"
"Under the circumstances." Brett pointed a finger at him in emphasis. "Now, if you say that to me when you're sober, it might be a different matter altogether."
Danny finally, brightly smiled. "I won't, Your Lordship. You can count on it!"
"I will," said Brett. "And now, after you finish your coffee, you should start to think about sleeping for the rest of the night. You can stay on the couch here if you want."
Danny was about to protest and suggest that they spend the rest of the night going out on the town together, but when he really stopped to think about how much liquor he'd already drunk, he decided against it. When he pictured tomorrow's massive hangover, sleep sounded pretty good.
"Okay," he said agreeably. "And Brett . . . thanks."
Brett nodded. "Of course."
Several minutes later, as Danny was settling in on Brett's soft couch, he thought again about Angie and Brett. Thoughts of Angie still gave him a bittersweet feeling and likely always would; he couldn't forget about the good times so easily, even if now he wondered if Angie had ever genuinely cared about him.
Thoughts of Brett gave him a much different series of feelings. Some of it he was still unsure of, but he could pick out amazement, confusion, a bit of exasperation, and awe. They were so very different, and he doubted he would ever fully understand Brett's inherited cushy lifestyle, but despite being from such completely opposite backgrounds and not even liking each other at first, it was Brett and not Angie who had been unselfishly concerned with Danny's well-being.
So that meant . . . what?
Danny had lost a friend, yet perhaps he already had a better one.
When Brett came in a bit later to check on him, he found Danny asleep with a smile on his face.