The Journey Home
"Let her go." Clarke grabs Bellamy by the arm the second he tries to step forward. He stares after his sister, but doesn't try to move. "Octavia needed closure for what happened with Lincoln, and now she needs to be alone."
"How do you know?" He asks, his eyes following Octavia.
"Just trust me," Clarke offers Bellamy a small smile. "She'll be alright, she just needs to grieve." Octavia steps out of sight and Bellamy's gaze moves to Clarke. After a moment he nods and puts and hand over hers, her fingers tremble just slightly, still shaken from whatever she had been through in the City of Light. When she had reached for his hand before having the flame put in her head, her hand had seemed so small. When Bellamy felt her fingers graze his hand he had taken it lightly at first, but she had squeezed his hand like her life depended on it and he had gripped hers just as tightly in return. Clarke pulls her hand away and the two of them observe the room. Abby and Kane are still wrapped in each other's arms, Jackson is sitting on the floor with his head in his hands, Murphy is talking quietly with a grounder woman with dark hair and a elaborate face tattoo. Bryan and Miller are sitting on the floor, Bryan resting his head on Miller's shoulder. Jaha sits near the center of the room, next to Pike's body, but his eyes are vacant. The grounders and the rest sky people in the room look lost.
"Now what?" Bellamy asks after a long time.
"I don't know." She doesn't even know how to get back down to the ground. Bellamy helps Clarke take the tube out of her arm. She winces, but doesn't make a sound.
"Sorry, I know it hurts." Clarke looks up at Bellamy, but he's staring intently at her arm, pressing his thumb against the spot where the needle had connected with her skin to stop the bleeding.
"Bellamy," She struggles to find the right words, "thank you for being beside me, for believing in me," Clarke pauses. "I was so scared," Clarke's voice waivers just a tiny bit, but Bellamy notices. He rubs his thumb gently across her arm.
"Me too," he says quietly.
"Wanheda." A familiar voice fills the room and Bellamy releases Clarke's arm. She quickly slips the Flame into her pocket.
"Roan?" The last thing she could recall was seeing Roan on the ground, a gunshot bringing him down, she had been certain he was dead. Roan ignores Clarke and looks around the room, his eyes find Ontari. Her chest still pried open and her lifeless body lying on the table, tubes still connected to her arms.
"You killed her?" He reaches for his weapon, anger flashing across his face, but Clarke sees something else, pain. Physical or emotional, she can't tell. Bellamy steps in front of Clarke.
"No!" Clarke exclaims. "ALIE was trying to stop us by killing the last Nightblood. She was brain dead Roan, she wouldn't have lived much longer."
"So you do this to her?" His grip tightens on his sword and Clarke tries to push past Bellamy, but it's like trying to move a wall. She has to calm Roan down before all of the grounders in the room turn on them.
"We had to, to stop ALIE," Clarke reasons. "I'm sorry Ontari got hurt, I didn't want anyone else to die, but there was no other way," she pauses. "I'm sorry."
"Just one more death on your hands, Wanheda," Roan's words hit Clarke like a smack across the face.
"No," Bellamy says sternly. "Everything that happened is on ALIE and she's gone." Roan doesn't say anything else. He releases his weapon and moves towards Ontari's body, limping just slightly. "How did you get up here? You were shot, you couldn't have climbed up the wall with an injury like that."
"I took the stairs," Roan starts pulling the tubes from Ontari's veins. He reaches for the retractor, but his hands falter just above it, unsure of how to remove it.
"Here, let me." Clarke takes a step past Bellamy, he gives her his best 'this is a bad idea' look, but Clarke just offers a smile before walking over to Roan. "May I?" She asks before she touches Ontari's body. Roan gives her a long look, but nods. Clarke takes her time removing the retractor. Bellamy moves to stand beside her and continues questioning Roan.
"What stairs? They were all destroyed on our way up here," He asks.
"There's a secret stairwell that only a few people know about it, most of them dead." Clarke doesn't let herself wonder who he's talking about, she has to focus, the retractor is almost out of Ontari's chest.
"Where is it?" Bellamy inquires as Clarke carefully pulls retractor out and places it on the table, her fingers going to Ontari's shirt.
"The Commander's room." Clarke's hands freeze for just a moment before she forces herself to finish buttoning Ontari's top, hiding the gaping hole in her chest. "Before I show you where it is I need the Flame, Wanheda." Roan offers his hand, palm upwards, waiting for Clarke to surrender it. "We must have a commander." Clarke takes a careful step away from him, she doesn't want the Flame taken from her. It's all she has left.
"Give us a second," Bellamy says to Roan before taking Clarke by the hand and pulling her away from Roan. When they're far enough away that he can't hear them Bellamy speaks again. "I know you don't want to let it go Clarke, but if giving Roan the A.I. means all of our people get out of here alive—"
"I know, Bellamy," Clarke interrupts, "but it's all I have left of her," Clarke can't meet Bellamy's eyes. She feels so selfish for wanting to keep the Flame. It's not hers to have, but she doesn't want to let it go. She doesn't know if she can. She could stay, become the new Flamekeeper. She ponders this for only a moment before Bellamy's voice pulls her from her thoughts.
"That's not true." Clarke looks up into Bellamy's soft, brown eyes. "You have your memories, Clarke, no one can take the time you had with her away." The gentleness in his eyes manages to calm Clarke just slightly. His hand is soft on hers and his words make her heart feel little bit lighter. "The Flame isn't Lexa, it's the Commander of the grounders and we can't keep that from them." After a long moment Clarke nods and pulls the Flame out of her pocket. Her eyes find Roan, who is still standing next to Ontari's body, which is now covered by a dark red cloth. Clarke closes the distance between herself and Roan and puts the Flame into his hand without letting herself think about it. His fingers wrap tightly around it.
"Now show us where the stairs are," Clarke struggles to keep her voice even, but Roan simply nods before addressing the grounders in the room in Trigedasleng. Clarke catches a few words, but even after months in their land she isn't fluent in the language. She hears Skaikru and the word that means going. He continues and Clarke is able to translate a few more phrases. Tend to the wounded, and something about Nightblood.
"Alright, guys, listen up!" Bellamy's voice quiets the room and Clarke is able to speak.
"We're going home," Clarke says with a small smile and people slowly start to get to their feet. Bellamy notices Bryan and Miller struggling to stand and goes to help them. Clarke watches as he pulls Bryan's arm over his shoulder and with Miller on the other side the two of them get Bryan upright. Bellamy says something, but Clarke can't hear him over the growing chatter in the room. She can see his encouraging smile though, and she can't help but feel relieved. When she put the Flame in her head she didn't know what she would come back to, she had been so happy to see all of the people she cared about were alright. She didn't know if she could handle losing anyone else. She recalled A.L.I.E.'s warning. Six months. She had six months. What the hell was she going to do?
"Wanheda," Clarke flinches at the name, but turns to face Roan. "I don't think I will ever understand what happened here, but my people seem to be back to normal, so I will thank you." Clarke nods, but Roan isn't finished. "For now, we have a truce, but when the new commander is chosen, it will be up to them to decide the fate of your people." Clarke can only nod again. She has more important things to worry about, like finding a way to save the world. Again.
"Will you show us where the stairs are?" She asks, feeling Bellamy's presence without having to look over her shoulder. Roan shakes his head.
"I will not leave Ontari," Bellamy opens his mouth to demand that Roan show them the exit, but he continues, "The stairs are under the rug, beneath the bed. It's a small staircase, but it goes all the way down to the ground."
"How did you know about it?" Clarke asks, her curiosity getting the best of her. Roan gives her a knowing look.
"The commander before Lexa was very dear to me. My mother had forbidden me from seeing her, believing that if any our people saw us together, they would believe that Azgeda was not equal with the rest of Clans. When I told my Heda this she showed me the stairs, only the commanders and flame keepers were supposed to know of their existence. In case a commander ever needed to escape danger." Roan's mouth curls into a mischievous smile. "I used it often to sneak past her guards and prying eyes."
"Where's the Commander's room?" Bellamy asks.
"I know where it is," Clarke announces. Bellamy says nothing and Clarke doesn't meet his eyes as she turns and makes her way to the doorway. She can feel Bellamy, still silent behind her, and knows her people will follow them.
When they make it to Lexa's room Clarke makes it a point to not look at the bed. Bellamy and Miller slide it to the far side of the room and flip the rug over, revealing a hidden door. "Anyone not injured should head down first, so we can move quickly," Bellamy proclaims before his eyes find Kane, Abby, Jackson, and Jaha, all standing quietly together beside the door, Abby's hand linked with Kane's. He also finds Clarke in the crowd, staring at some kind of table covered with an abundance of unlit candles. He goes to Abby first. As he approaches he notices that Kane won't meet his eyes. "We need to make sure all of our people get back to Arkadia. The wounded are going to have a hard time with the stairs and the walk so we need to treat as many of them as we can here. Can you and Jackson handle that?" He asks Abby, who nods. "We also need someone to make sure everyone gets out."
"I'll handle that," Kane replies without looking at him.
"I'd like to help as well, it's my fault these people are here, I should make sure they get home." Jaha has a hand over the gunshot wound in his arm, it isn't bleeding much. Bellamy had only grazed him to try and stop him from killing Ontari. Jaha turns to Abby. "One more patch job for old time's sake?" His eyes shift to the blood soaked part of his shirt. Abby offers a smile and pulls her hand from Kane's before starting to examine Jaha's wound.
"Bellamy," Kane begins, his eyes still avoiding Bellamy's gaze, "I never would have hurt you—"
"I know." Bellamy cuts him off and Kane finally looks at him. "No one is responsible for what they did when they were chipped, we're all alive and that's what matters." He glances over at Clarke, who is still staring at the table. "Let's just get our people home," He says to Kane, who nods and heads out the door in search of more of their people, a patched up Jaha following him out.
"Bellamy," Abby's voice brings Bellamy's gaze away from Clarke. "Stay beside her." When he looks into Abby's eyes Bellamy sees the fierce devotion his mother had as well. "She's strong, but she's been through a lot. I have to make sure all of our people get out of here so you have to watch her for me, okay?" All Bellamy can do is nod. Abby smiles and puts her hand on his arm for a moment before heading over to Bryan, who is struggling to stay standing. Bellamy takes a moment to watch as their people head down the hidden staircase, knowing it's sure to be a long way down.
Clarke is so lost in thought she doesn't notice Bellamy standing beside her. He looks over her shoulder at the table, the only thing there is a small gear. He has to think for a moment, it does look familiar to him, though he isn't sure how. "Oh," He says suddenly when he remembers, "it was hers, wasn't it? She wore it on her forehead." Clarke nods and stares at it for just a moment longer before turning her back to the table. "We should head down, Kane and Jaha are looking for more of our people and Jackson and Abby are tending to the wounded."
"I should help them," Clarke says, moving towards her mother. Bellamy puts a hand on her shoulder, stopping her with next to no effort.
"No," Bellamy says softly, "you and I are making sure the rest of our people get home okay," Clarke looks over her shoulder at him, her eyes seemingly uncertain. "Let the adults handle this, you've done enough." Clarke looks around the room, the amount of people inside it shrinking quickly as they head down the stairs. A few newcomers wander in, people Jaha and Kane must have found. "Clarke," Bellamy keeps his voice soft and low and she looks at him once again. "Let's go home," he takes a short pause before adding, "Together." The corners of her mouth lift up just slightly, a tiny smile, but a smile all the same.
"Together," She agrees and takes a few steps towards the stairs, causing his hand to slowly slide off of her shoulder. Bellamy takes only one extra second to pick up the small gear and put it in his pocket. He is beside Clarke again in three steps and the two of them descend the stairs side by side. Together.