Chapter One: Tesseract, Tony, and Energy Drinks
Few times in the course of one's life does one turn to moments of near insanity. This may be in the sheer moments before ones wedding vows, after receiving a 49% on a mandatory-successful-completion class, or when the occupant of the seat behind you on the bus is having the world's loudest telephone conversation. In the case of Tony Stark, it was neither. It was at that moment, when the millionaire playboy genius raised the tesseract above his head and hurled it against an innocent by-standing wall while uttering a war-like cry. Instead of crashing to the ground in a million pieces, as we can only guess was the intent, a cold blue light shot out from the cube spreading wider as a hole opened up in time and space and a split second later all five of the present superheroes where sucked through it.
Lets rewind a bit.
Tony Stark sat at his desk staring reproachfully at the once- glowing cube in front of him. Dr. Bruce Banner sat in a chair across from him with a similar expression. They had been sitting much the same way for a good hour or so with little progress in it for obvious reasons.
"Well, maybe it needs some sort of kick start—like a power boost." Bruce offered with a shrug.
"We've been testing this thing for weeks now and we've given it everything we've got. There's no reason why it should have shut down like that. It's impossible!"
"I know but—"
Whatever Banner was about to say, helpful or not was cut off when the door opened suddenly and the super soldier, Captain America strode in.
"Security breach!" Tony yelped. "It's a Capsicle!" The soldier didn't seem to notice.
"Stark, Banner," he offered, nodding to each respectively, "bad news. Thor wants the Tesseract back—like now. He's coming here soon to pick it up. I don't think he trusts us with it—not that he should anyway" He gave the blue cube a quick glance and suppressed a shiver. Working or not working, there was something unnerving about that blue block of whatever it was, like an explosion waiting to happen. "Any luck with it so far?" the answer was fairly obvious.
"I don't understand it" Tony said sulkily, all humor gone. "Maybe if I have more time I could get it going again, I just need—"
"Tony, come on, you've been working on this for five days straight. You need a rest!" Steve's eyes swept around the lab. Honestly, the place looked like a tornado had crashed through it. Empty cans of energy drinks, papers, wires, books, and various unidentifiable tools were scattered everywhere. Where the garbage had once been was a mound of crumpled up paper ten feet high. After that had been covered beyond recognition, the millionaire or what seemed now to be a mad scientist, had given up and used the general floor area instead.
"I've been telling that to him for days and he still won't listen to me." Bruce grumbled.
"I told you!" Tony said irritated jumping up from his seat, "I'll break when I'm done! And I will get it done! Even if it kills me!" but as soon as he was up, he appeared to have a hard time staying there. His legs began shaking from mix of severe exhaustion and an alarming number of energy drinks. The genius seemed to find it amusing and broke out into an insane sounding laughter.
"Whoa there Frankenstein," Steve muttered, helping the delirious man back to his chair.
Dr. Banner sighed exasperated, with his palm in his face, "Here he goes again. Not the creepy laughter. Tony, as your friend, and a doctor, I'm telling you—get some rest!"
"Never!" he shrieked like a five year old protesting against his bedtime hour, threw a nearby tissue box in the general direction of the offender, while he continued laughing hysterically.
That was when agent Clint Barton walked in with agent Natasha Romanoff. He was promptly greeted at the door with a tissue box in the face.
"Okay, how long has he been in here this time?" he snarled, ready to sling the box back with vengeance.
The millionaire seemed unfazed by this new threat, "I'm never ever ever going to leave! Mwahahahaha!"
"Tony, listen to me," Natasha said in a motherly voice, "It's not nice to throw tissue boxes. Apologise to Agent Barton." Slowly, carefully, she edged her way towards the crazed man's desk.
Tony stared at her blankly for a few seconds before responding, "Who are you?"
"Oh. That long, huh?" Clint inched closer towards the exit.
Before the Black Widow reached the desk, Tony grabbed a previously neutral eraser and threw it wildly towards her. It missed, however, but the damage was done.
"Okay, the genius gets it!" she cried, grabbing the tissue box from Clint and preparing to drive it straight at him. Thankfully for Tony, Steve managed to pry if from her before she reached her goal.
"Look everyone, we need to behave like reasonable adults here, alright? Thor will be here any minute to collect the tesseract and bring it back to Asgard. I want everyone to be behaving responsibly." he gave a pointed glare at Tony who stuck out his tongue.
D. Banner stood up, brushing off his spotless shirt. "Well I guess I'll take the tesseract to my lab, two rooms down. It's cleaner—well obviously—anyway, Tony, sorry buddy, it's coming with me." But Tony looked like he wasn't about to comply with this.
"What do you mean it's coming with you? I'm not done with it yet!"
"Tony, look, it belongs with Thor—"
"It belongs with me!" Tony was hugging the cube like a blanket, refusing to let go.
"No, no, no, no," Banner tried fruitlessly to retrieve the tesseract from his tight grip, "It's—coming—with—me—now!" he huffed. Finally after much tugging and pulling, he gave up and sank back into his chair. "and I thought Loki was crazy!"
"If I don't get it nobody gets it!" Tony hollered.
If Dr. Banner, or any of the avengers had known what was to happen next, they would have been on top of Tony in an instant but as they did not, nothing could have prepared them for what happened next. It was at that moment, when the millionaire playboy genius raised the tesseract above his head and hurled it against an innocent by-standing wall while uttering a war-like cry. Instead of crashing to the ground in a million pieces, as we can only guess was the intent, a cold blue light shot out from the cube spreading wider as a hole opened up in time and space and a split second later all five of the present superheroes where sucked through it.