I don't own anything. Stop rubbing it in.
I just figured that, with all of us going absolutely nuts these last few days before the premiere, we could all use some good 'ol non-drama, angst free, fluff-tastic, comical GSR. Ooh, imagine that- it's exactly what I've got for you today.
Thanks to TDCSI for the assistance and for dealing with me the entire time I wrote this.
Mmm, funny fluff.
Grissom pulled into their driveway and sighed as he shut the vehicle off. A long day at the lab had him past the state of exhausted and he wanted nothing more than to take a shower and sleep the weekend away with Sara right beside him.
After grabbing the few things from the seat next him, he got out, set the alarm, and headed towards the lawn. For some reason, Sara hadn't grabbed the morning paper yet. Eh, no big deal. He grabbed it and the mail and went in the house.
He was greeted in the short hallway by the smell of breakfast cooking. His previous plans may not have included breakfast before, but they were quickly being altered. Not really caring where anything landed, he dropped everything he was carrying by the door before slipping his shoes off next to Sara's.
"Sara?" he called out, making his way towards the smell of food.
He heard a faint noise from the kitchen, but he didn't know what it was, so he called out to her again. "Sara? Sara, you in the kitchen?"
"Yeah, I'm in here," she called back.
He groaned. "Sara, you are not even going to believe the day I-" he stopped as he turned the corner into the kitchen.
His sentence was cut off by an incredibly shrill and laugh infected scream.
"What the hell is that?" he said, pointing to a splotchy being in a highchair at the counter.
"A kangaroo, Grissom," she said as she rolled her eyes. "It's a kid. Duh."
"When did we have a kid? Did I miss out on something?" he asked as he looked around their completely destroyed home.
"And good morning to you, too." She laughed. "We didn't have a kid. I…borrowed him," she said, keeping her attention between the pan on the stove and the gurgling kid nearby.
"You borrowed a child? You actually got someone to lend you one of their children?" he asked in complete disbelief.
"Uh-huh." She answered like everyone should lend her their kid and took the toddler out of the chair. She tried handing the kid to Grissom, but he looked at her like she was crazy, so she let him down on the floor. "He's only here for the weekend. Besides, you said you wanted a kid. Meet your son for the next couple days."
"Where'd you get it?"
"Its name is Trent and he's Nick's nephew."
"Well…" Grissom looked from Sara to the child tugging at his pant leg. "Why do you have it?"
"We have Trent because Nick's sister is in town for a couple weeks and you keep on with all this jazz about wanting a baby. I borrowed him so I could finally get my point across to you about why I'm not so fond of the idea."
"Sara-"
"Isn't he just adorable?!" she interrupted with a squeal and reached down to pick him up again.
"Yeah, just precious," Grissom said flatly. "What's he covered in?"
"Peas. Well, mostly. That," she pointed to a purple spot. "…is Juicy Juice."
"Juicy Juice?" he questioned, obviously having no clue about anything child related and no clue that Sara actually did.
"It's a drink." She informed him.
"You seem decently knowledgeable about…this." He pointed at a smudge. "You spend the day baby wrangling and reading?"
"Is that blue? I don't know what that is," she muttered, trying to wipe the smudge away. "Oh, and no to your question. When I asked to borrow him, I got the run down of it all."
"Stop saying you 'borrowed' him. It makes me feel like we're running a baby smuggling ring out of here." He smirked.
"Fine. I asked Nick's sister if I could use Trent's services this weekend to show you a thing or two." She smirked back.
"Yeah…let's stick with we borrowed it." He laughed. "You know, this explains why Nick avoided me tonight. He knew what I was walking into when I came home," he said, still surveying the damage his home had taken since Trent's entry into it.
"Don't get mad at him. I told Nick not to tell you."
"Figures you would do something like this. This is pretty much the same way I came home to meet Bruno." Saying his name caused realization to hit. "Sara, where's our dog?"
"I put him out back. Trent pulled his tail and so Bruno growled at him. Then Trent cried for about half an hour after that, so I just put Bruno outside for now. You know, keep the conflict to a minimum." She explained as she tickled Trent.
"It smells funny." Grissom sighed. "Why isn't he potty trained?"
"He is to a point, but he took a nap before I gave him peas. I had a diaper on him because I'd rather not have him pee all over the couch."
"Shouldn't you go change it?" he asked.
"I'll tell you right now, Grissom, if we ever did have a kid, you'd have to learn their name eventually. You couldn't just call them 'it' all the time."
"Sorry." He shrugged and looked at the little guy. "Trent."
"Congratulations, you now know his name," she deadpanned. "On to your next test," Sara said, basically forcing Trent into Grissom's arms.
"What?"
"You've heard 'he who smelt it, dealt it,' right? Well, now it's 'he who smelt it goes and changes it.' Enjoy."
Grissom scoffed. "I just got home."
Sara's scoff matched his. "And I've been at home with him all day."
"Well, how many have you changed?"
"It doesn't matter, just go do it."
His eyes widened. "You haven't even changed him!?"
"Potty training, remember? He woke up once and I changed him, but it wasn't one that smelled like that." She laughed.
"How is this fair? Seriously. How is this fair?" he asked, adjusting the fidgeting child in his arms.
"I know why I don't want kids. This is an effort to show you why," she said. "Now, take Le Pew and go. All of his stuff is in the guest room." At that, Sara turned back to the stove to finish cooking with a giant smirk on her face.
Grissom carried Trent upstairs and into the guest room, laying him down on a towel that had been put on the bed, assuming that it was there for changing purposes. Figuring that it couldn't be to be too hard to change the kid's diaper because it was really just a matter of remembering the removal steps of the soiled one and doing those backwards to fit Trent with a clean one, Grissom found the bag that held the necessary items.
He got out everything he needed, or assumed he needed, and laid it out in a neat row. Turning his attentions back to Trent, he began to undress the kid.
"…damn buttons. Like you really need this many," he complained. "Grown man can't even- I can't…what the hell is that thing supposed to even be?" he muttered to himself, entertaining Trent in the process. "Snaps there, buttons here. Easier just to be naked, I'd say. Can't even get the fu-" his eyes moved to Trent's and he stopped his words. "Sorry," he said and went back to work. "If I can barely undress you, then dressing you should really be a treat." He sighed.
Eventually, Grissom got Trent down to his diaper…and the smell in the room was proof of that.
"I deal with decomp all the time. Try as you might, but you've got nothing on those poor souls, my boy." Grissom laughed.
Though he most likely had no clue what Grissom was saying to him, Trent laughed at everything that came out of his mouth. What was especially entertaining to Trent was when Grissom got on the phone with Nick.
"Yeah, Nick, I need to talk to your sister," he whispered, peeking out the door to make sure Sara wasn't coming.
"She isn't here. What'd you need, boss?" Nick asked.
"Um…I got another diaper on him, but I can't get the clothes figured out. There's got to be five straps with thirty buttons and snaps on it." He complained after he shut the door.
"Why'd you put another diaper on him?"
Realizing his mistake, Grissom muttered a cuss word under his breath and took the diaper off. "Assuming he has underwear, where are they?"
"One of the bags. Good luck finding them, though. My sister packed four bags just for the weekend." Nick laughed. "She gets worried that she'll forget something he'll need."
Going through the bags, Grissom laughed. "I think the only thing she forgot to pack for him was a bed."
"I told her not to worry about it," Sara said, scaring Grissom and making Trent laugh loud enough for Nick to hear over the phone.
Grissom told Nick goodbye and hung up as quickly as he could so Sara wouldn't know who he was talking to.
"What?" he asked innocently.
"You're cheating." She accused. "You and I have him for the weekend. This is to show you how raising a kid really is. You aren't supposed to call people for help."
"Fine, then you help. I found his underwear, but I give up on his outfit. Whoever designed it should be shot," he said with total seriousness.
Within five minutes, Sara had Trent redressed and the mess around them straightened up. "It's not hard, Griss," she said.
He grinned. "You're pretty good at that."
"So?"
"Where'd you learn to dress little kids?" he asked.
She laughed. "Like I said, it's not that hard. Take the top of the snap and match it up with the bottom half."
"You've got motherly instincts. You know that, right?" he pointed out.
Her face went a little pink. "No, I do not. Griss, most people aren't so easily outwitted by clothes," she said and left.
Grissom turned to the giggling toddler. "It's not that funny, you know."
----
"Sara, I'm not really comfortable with this." Grissom said, concern dripping from every word. "Really. It just doesn't seem like a good idea, you know."
"Why not?"
"Well, he's a baby," he said, pointing to Trent in his highchair.
"He's over twenty months old, Grissom. He's not a baby," Sara said. "Besides, it's not that much."
"Look at the mess he made from supper, Sara." He nodded to the piles of now indiscernible food under the highchair. "What do you think he's going to do with ice cream?"
"Enjoy it like any other normal child on Earth," she said, placing the Backyardigans bowl, complete with one scoop of chocolate ice cream, in front of him.
"You're just going to let him go for it?" Grissom asked in shock. "No spoon?"
"He doesn't know how to use one yet. Just let him enjoy it." Sara shushed him and stood back as Trent's eyes lit up when he stuck his hand in the cold treat.
Grissom laughed right along with the two of them as ice cream dribbled down Trent's chin and straight down his chest. By the time he was done 'eating' the stuff, it looked more like an entire gallon had been placed in front of him.
"You know, I'd say 'I told you so,' but it really doesn't seem like it'd be enough right now." Grissom laughed.
"I didn't think it'd be that bad." Sara cringed as Trent screeched and slammed the bowl down on the tray in front of him.
"Sugar buzz, already?"
"I suppose." She laughed.
"Think he'll tolerate a bath like that?" he asked in a hopeful tone.
She shrugged. "Put enough toys in the water and I'm sure anything is possible."
----
The bath lasted for two hours due to Trent continuously splashing water out of the tub. That and the fact that Grissom could barely keep hold of him long enough to actually wash him. The sugar buzz was in full effect during bath time.
As he continued drying him off, Grissom made his way into the guest room to find Sara getting Trent's pajamas out. "What were you doing the whole time we were in there?" he asked.
"Cleaning the haz mat scene downstairs." She laughed.
"Dress him and I'll go clean up the bathroom?" he asked.
"No problem," she said, taking Trent. "I heard you two thumping around. It's probably flooded in there."
"If the Ark would fit, it would probably float," Grissom said and left.
Just as Sara finished getting the little man dressed, she heard a loud thud and a groan from down the hall. She grabbed up her weekend company and headed off to see what it was.
"Grissom? Griss, what was that?" she called out, walking down the hall.
She didn't hear anything, so she called out for him again. That time she got a response and she found him on the bathroom floor, lying on his back.
"I just wanted to come home and go to bed," he moaned.
"What happened?!"
"I stepped on one of his toys and went for a little trip," he said, trying to sit up. "I knew that duck looked evil."
She set Trent down and helped Grissom the rest of the way up. "Are you okay?" she asked.
"Can we go to sleep now? I just want today to end."
"Yeah," she said through her laughter.
----
When Sara put Trent in the middle of their bed, it threw Grissom. Surely that was not where the young man was spending the night. Most certainly it couldn't be where he was spending the weekend.
"Sara?" he said, stripping down to his boxers and climbing into bed.
"Hmm?" she mumbled from their bathroom as she changed.
"Why's he in here?"
"It's where he's sleeping, Grissom."
"Sara, why is he sleeping in here? Why can't he just sleep in the guest room? He's a guest. Guest. Guest room. It's in the name, Sara." He needlessly pointed out.
"He's a little kid, Griss. You want him to fall right off the bed?" She asked when she came back in the room and got in bed with the two of them.
"He's gotta learn some time," he muttered.
"Grissom!" she yelled.
"I'm kidding!" he defended. "But I'd like to not worry about having my ear screamed off in the morning by a two-year-old that finds it to be just the funniest thing ever." His complaint was accentuated by a short yell and giggle from Trent.
"Yeah, but those screams come from the heart, you know," she said jokingly. "Ease up, Griss. You want kids and sleeping with Mom and Dad on occasion because of bad dreams or whatever is all a part of them," she said. "You want them, then you have to take everything that comes with the job."
He eyed Trent wearily. "You put a diaper on him, right?"
----
Two hours after Grissom had finally fallen asleep, he and Sara both woke to the most horrid scream either of them had ever heard in their lives. Grissom freaked and fell off the bed, hitting his head on the nightstand. Sara knocked nearly everything off her table trying to get the light turned on so she could see what was going on.
Once she had it on, they saw Trent in the middle of the bed, reaching out for whoever would take him, screaming to high Heaven.
"Son of a bitch." Grissom groaned, rubbing the back of his head.
"Language, Grissom!" Sara yelled as she reached for the bawling child.
"Concussion, actually. What's wrong with him?"
"I think he had a bad dream," she said, shushing Trent.
"About what?" he asked.
She shot him a look and he apologized.
"Well, what do we do? When does he stop?"
Sara ignored Grissom because she was holding Trent to her and making soothing circles on his back while she whispered something in his ear. Not five minutes later, Trent was back to sleep.
"What was that?" Grissom asked.
"Nightmare." She repeated.
"No, not that. What you just did."
"I don't know." She shrugged. "He was screaming his head off and I just…went with it, I guess."
"Oh." He smiled. "Like a motherly instinct?"
"No. Not like a motherly instinct," she snapped, knowing what he was getting at. "Go back to sleep, Grissom," she said, putting Trent carefully back in the middle of the bed.
----
As if the mid-sleep, screaming wake up (mixed with a giant knot on the back of his head) hadn't been unpleasant enough for Grissom, Sara added to the fun when the alarm clock went off a few hours later and she informed him that she'd done some shift switching so that he could have a day alone with Trent.
"The death of me, woman." He sighed when she gave him a good-bye kiss and left.
Figuring that if Trent saw him sleeping, maybe he'd go along with it and go back to sleep himself, Grissom lay stock-still and pretended to snore. Of course Grissom was more than ready to fall right back to sleep, but the alarm apparently had Trent up and ready for whatever the day had to offer him.
Trent crawled over to Grissom and swatted him on the stomach, stopping the fake snoring when he groaned in pain.
"Not cool, kid," he said and got a laugh for a response.
Trent continued to poke, prod, scratch, pinch, and swat Grissom everywhere he could possibly reach until Grissom finally gave in and got out of bed. "I'm telling you now that it's too early for the screaming. I want none of it," he said, picking up the urine soaked kid.
"Oh…dear God…no," he groaned and wrinkled his nose. "That's a lot of pee."
Trent gave a humored scream into his ear and Grissom held him straight out in front of him as he carried him into the bathroom. He set Trent down on the floor and started the water in the tub. "When did you even drink that much?" Grissom asked, stripping the diaper off him.
The smelly child just looked at Grissom and let out another ear-piercing shriek. Grissom winced as it just made his headache from the night before worse. "Thanks for that," he said flatly and felt the water. "Well, it's not hot and it's not cold. Perfect. Try not to drown me this time, will ya?"
----
Grissom's second time bathing the kid took only an hour since he was smart enough to only put half the water in the tub as he had last time. Though Trent had still made a pretty good mess in the time he was in there, it was a hell of a lot better than the night before.
He took Trent out of the tub and stood him up on the floor, wrapping a towel around him. Reaching over the side of the tub to pull the plug, he didn't see Trent take off as fast as his wobbly little legs could carry him. It wasn't that fast, but it was fast enough so that when Grissom turned around, it was to an empty room. His eyes nearly shot out of his head at the sight of no child.
"Trent?!" he yelled.
He heard a giggle from down the hall and immediately headed out. Stepping into the hall, he saw a stark naked toddler moving as fast as possible. Fearing that he'd fall down the steps or knock over one of the plants in the hall, Grissom ran to catch up with him.
"C'mere," he said and grabbed him up, mid-step. Trent laughed and squealed and laughed some more while Grissom carried him into the guest room to dress him. After Trent was decked out in some rather spiffy Buzz Lightyear underwear, and Grissom had explained to him what a light-year was, it was decided that any more clothing than that was completely unnecessary since it was just the two of them and Grissom was still in his boxers. Like he'd said the day before, it was just easier to be naked.
"Okay…you're clean and I can just wait until Sara gets here to take a shower. So, now that we're dressed to the nine's for today, I guess breakfast is next," Grissom said and helped Trent off the bed and onto the floor since he was clearly in the mood for walking for himself.
Grissom held his hand as they made their way down the steps and to the kitchen. After putting Trent in his chair, Grissom went searching through the bag on the counter that was evidently another bag from his mother. The search turned up Cheerios for breakfast.
"I'm not stupid, Trent. You're eating these dry," he said, pouring a decent amount onto the tray for the kid.
Grissom got himself a bowl and ate some Cheerios right along with him and couldn't help but laugh when Trent started licking the cereal and sticking it to himself. By the end of breakfast, he had eaten and painted himself with equal amounts of the stuff.
Grabbing Trent and putting him on the floor to brush him off, Grissom was distracted by Bruno scratching at the back door. Trent let out a delighted scream at the sight of the dog and Bruno scratched and whined some more.
Sighing, Grissom yelled for the dog to go away. He couldn't let him in and have him being mean to the child he was taking care of. When Bruno just whined even more, causing Trent to laugh and scream more, Grissom felt terrible.
"Bruno, go," he tried again.
The dog just stood at the door and continued to whine as he watched Grissom cater to another being inside his home.
"Bruno…you gotta go away!" Grissom yelled with a sigh and Bruno cried some more.
He looked from Trent to the dog and back to Trent. "You leave my dog's tail alone," he said with warning and went to the door. Before he opened it, he looked down at Bruno and said, "You leave my borrowed kid alone."
As soon as the door was open, Bruno was through it and right on Trent's trail. Grissom was scared to death that something bad was about to happen, but Trent just laughed when Bruno started licking Cheerios off of him.
----
The few hours between breakfast and nap time were filled with morning cartoons, piggyback rides, Grissom attempting to read a forensic magazine to Trent, failed attempts at hide-and-seek (because Grissom lost Trent…twice), make-shift airplane rides, and a snack that involved pretty much everything you shouldn't give a kid Trent's age.
Grissom surveyed what he'd laid out on the coffee table in the living room. Trent stood by and listened while he eyed the cavity causing fun in front of him. "Okay…we've got Ho-Ho's, Ding Dongs, licorice, fat-free popcorn…I didn't even know they made that. Um…I don't know what this thing is," he held up a square item. "…but it's got chocolate on it, so it should be good. There's some Skittles for us, and peanut butter. Pop tarts, Trent. Have you ever had pop tarts, buddy? Eighth wonder of the world right here," Grissom said, biting into a raspberry one. "We've also got water to drink because we've got to think about our figure, Trent." Grissom joked, even though Trent just gave him a look that said, 'shut up and feed me, old man.'
Any normal person witnessing such a feast would probably accuse Grissom of being insane while they were on the phone with child services, but Grissom had an idea about what he was doing- the classic 'what goes up must come down' approach.
Half an hour after they had stopped eating, Grissom was thinking his idea had been a terrible one. Not only because his stomach felt like it was going to explode and the heartburn he was experiencing was ridiculous, but also because Trent was wigging the hell out.
Bruno was hiding under the dining table while Trent was making awkward noises as he circled the coffee table that held the leftovers. He was covered in chocolate and rainbow smears from the Skittles. Grissom sat on the couch and reached out to stop him, but Trent let out a nasty scream at him and started throwing his arms about like he was an octopus. Grissom quickly withdrew his arm and let the kid go about his business.
Trent went from circling the coffee table to circling the dining table. Bruno cried out as if he was begging Grissom to come save him but Grissom told him he was on his own. The dog darted out from under the table and ran straight past Trent. Trent went after him, screaming as loud as possible, but failed to catch him before he made it onto the couch next to Grissom.
Stopping in front of Grissom, Trent smiled innocently and held his arms out to him. Though he was little weary of the sudden change in behavior, Grissom went ahead and picked him up, setting Trent on his leg. He was quiet for about two seconds before he let out a holler and reached for the dog. Bruno jumped off the couch and ran up the stairs while Grissom held on to the ever-so-squirmy Trent.
"I thought I told you to leave my dog alone." Grissom laughed, dodging the small hands flying at his face. "Why don't you just stay on the couch for a while?"
His answer was scream and a young elbow to the throat.
During Grissom's coughing fit from the hit, Trent moved quickly to get down and ended up falling down instead. So now Grissom can barely breathe, has a dog that's supposed to protect the household, but was taken out by a two-year-old, and has a bawling child in front of him.
'Oh, the things Sara better do to me once this kid's gone.' Grissom thought and grabbed Trent from the floor.
Thinking it was the right thing to do, Grissom put Trent on his knee and bounced it a little bit while he continuously told him to calm down as he coughed. The bawling increased and snot started coming out of Trent's nose.
"Oh. Oh, ew." Grissom groaned and reached for anything he could find. He ended up using a throw pillow from the couch because there was nothing else within reach. Tossing the pillow on the floor, he looked at the still crying child. "Do you want to lay down? Nap?" he asked with all the hope in the world.
When Trent didn't react with a scream, Grissom took that as a positive sign and laid back on the couch. Laying Trent chest to chest on him, Grissom propped his own head up against another pillow and started waiting for Trent to go to sleep.
Trent didn't. He continued crying…a lot. Grissom started patting him on the back to try and comfort him, but he was doing it a little too hard. When Trent turned his head to look at him, Grissom realized it by the fact that his head was jerking every time he gave the child's back a hit.
Thinking of what Sara had done the night before, Grissom put his hand on Trent's back and started rubbing circles on it. The crying calmed a little and Trent was giving little hiccups every now and then. Though the crying may have been going away, Grissom wasn't accomplishing his goal of sleep, so he thought of what else Sara had done. She had talked to the kid. About what, Grissom had no clue, but she did.
Not knowing what was cool in the mind of Trent, besides trying to torture his dog, Grissom didn't know what to talk about…so he began reciting the elements. By the time he made his way around to gold the second time, he was quietly singing the table to Trent. When he got to man-mades again, Trent was out and drooling on him.
----
"Well, what will you eat?!" Grissom yelled, putting the can down on the counter with more force than necessary.
Trent laughed and Grissom gave him a dirty look.
They'd slept for nearly four hours, something that made Grissom very happy. He woke up to four hungry eyes staring at him. Trent had rejected everything Grissom had put in front of him so far. Thankfully, Bruno wasn't as picky as Trent and he'd finished eating a while ago and had gone back upstairs.
"Sara's going to be home in an hour. If I haven't fed you, she's going to have my ass." Grissom pleaded.
Trent gasped, apparently recognizing a word he wasn't supposed to hear.
"Sorry, but you get the point. You need to eat," Grissom said, going through their cabinets.
He found a box of saltines and opened it. Handing one to Trent, he waited for approval. Trent stuck his tongue out and brought the cracker to it, never taking his eyes off of Grissom. After Trent tasted the cracker, he bit a piece off. After that, he ate the rest of it and held his hand out for another.
Happy that he'd actually found something Trent would eat, Grissom handed him the whole sleeve of crackers. After getting something for each of them to drink, Grissom led him into the living room to eat again.
Trent discovered that Juicy Juice will dye your crackers purple. He also learned that enough juice on your cracker will make it gooey, but it will stick to things…things like Grissom's chest. Grissom allowed this, figuring it made Trent laugh, not cry, so what harm could it do?
----
A little over an hour later, Sara walked in to find her house (the one she had just cleaned last night) completely destroyed. "Grissom, what the hell did you do?!" she yelled.
Hearing Sara, he looked down at Trent. "I suggest you run and hide," he said.
Not understanding in time, Trent was still in the living room when Sara walked in to see it covered in purple crackers, chocolate, Skittles, the snot covered throw pillow that Bruno had ripped apart while Grissom and Trent slept, toys, and wrappers.
"Hi. How was work?" he tried.
"What'd you do to him? What'd he do to you?" she asked, motioning between the two of them. Both of them were covered in purple crusty stuff from the dyed cracker mess.
"I guess you could say we painted."
"What happened to my pillow?" she asked, picking up stuffing. "Why's the dog in the house?"
"He made me feel bad about myself." He shrugged.
Her eyes went to the chocolate encrusted coffee table. "Oh, no. Tell me you did not feed him all of that!"
"I-"
"He's two!" she yelled and Trent let out an amused scream.
"He loved it." Grissom laughed and popped a cracker in his mouth.
"Because he's two!"
"You do have a point." When she rolled her eyes, he said, "But we had fun and we're both still alive. Isn't that the point?"
She sighed and plopped down on the couch next to him. "Whatever. What's all over the two of you?"
"Saltines dyed with grape Juicy Juice. He wouldn't eat anything else but crackers. I think he was testing me or something," Grissom said.
"Because…" she started.
"He's two?" Grissom guessed.
"Very good."
"Thanks. How was work?"
She groaned as she looked around the room. Trent was still placing soggy crackers on himself. "I don't want to talk about work right now. I want my living room to look like a living room again, not like the Wicked Witch of Candy Land just settled a score against me."
"I got this." Grissom smiled. "I learned something earlier. Kids and dogs go great together." He went to the bottom of the stairs and called for Bruno. After a couple yells, the dog came running down. Sara watched as Grissom pointed into the living room and said, "clean."
Bruno ran over and licked Sara's hand before he started eating everything he could. Sara grabbed the chocolate, but the Skittles were gone and the crackers quickly followed. He ran around the whole room, sucking up everything edible in his path until he came upon Trent. When he did, Sara yelled at him to leave the kid alone, but Grissom told her to just watch. Bruno started licking the crackers and juice off Trent and the child just laughed as loud as possible when he did.
Trent started feeding Bruno crackers and Sara asked why they were both in their underwear while Grissom cleaned up the mess from the pillow.
"Because his outfits are stupid." Came his reply.
"Nice," she said. "Well, you both look like you caught the Barney version of leprosy. Which one of you is up for a bath first?"
"Me," he said. "Please."
"Sure. I was in the lab all day, so I'll be fine until later. I'll finish cleaning up all of this while you're up there." She said, "Oh, and change our sheets if you didn't already."
"You knew he'd peed that much and you didn't say anything?"
"Yeah." She nodded with a laugh. "What? It's not like you weren't going to notice it eventually."
----
When Grissom got back downstairs, he found it and Trent cleaned. Apparently the kitchen sink was big enough for him to fit in.
Sara, Trent, and Bruno were all sitting on the couch watching a movie.
"What's on?" Grissom asked when he sat down next to Sara.
Trent crawled from her lap to his as she answered, "Curious George."
"Ah, a movie that'll teach him to climb on things. You know, I think I have a slight problem with that." He laughed.
"Well, don't worry about it too much. Nick called while you were upstairs. His sister's coming for Trent in the morning."
"What? Why?" Grissom asked, not really wanting Trent to go.
"Work emergency back home," she answered. "It's not that big of a deal. She would've picked him up tomorrow anyway."
"Yeah, but we lose all day with him tomorrow." He complained.
"Well, you had all day today. I'm going to take a shower. Let's go out to dinner when I'm done." She suggested, thinking that taking Trent out to a restaurant would surely show Grissom a thing or two about raising a kid.
----
After Sara dressed Trent, and Grissom put Bruno outside, they headed off for a small restaurant they usually ate at when they got off work.
When they got there, it was close to full, but they got their seats. They strapped a booster seat on a chair next to Sara and put Trent in it. They each got their usual and Trent got a cut up hamburger and french-fries.
Grissom liked being out as a family quite a bit…until Trent started letting out his periodic screams.
For some reason, french-fries are entertaining enough to entice screams out of a child in the middle of public. Trent would eat a small piece of his burger, then grab a fistful of fries and yell.
The first time he did it, he scared Grissom enough to where he dropped his fork and had to get a new one. The second, third, and fourth time, he was just starting to be embarrassing to Grissom. By the eighth time, Sara loved the look on Grissom's face.
"What's wrong with him?" Grissom whispered to her across the table.
"He's two," she said with a shrug.
"Why is that the excuse for everything he does?"
"Because it is." She laughed. "He thinks it's normal. Just tell him to stop."
Grissom looked to Trent and told him to do so, but Trent looked at Grissom like his face had just turned into a pile of french-fries. Letting out the biggest scream of the night, Trent dropped a handful of fries onto the floor.
Just when Grissom thought he couldn't be more embarrassed, the manager walked over to the table and told him that they were going to need to leave because other customers were complaining so much about Trent's screams.
----
Grissom said nothing the whole way home. Sara stared out the window in an attempt to hide the amused look on her face. She'd obviously accomplished her goal for the day.
She held the front door open for Grissom so he could carry Trent in since he'd fallen asleep on the way home. He took him upstairs and put him in the middle of their bed. Sara took his shoes off and set them on the dresser before turning back to Grissom.
"Are you going to talk at all?" she asked him.
"You knew he was going to be like that." He accused as he stripped down for bed.
"And you didn't?" she laughed. "Honestly, Grissom, you had to see it coming."
"You're trying to make children seem like the worst thing ever."
"No, I'm not. If I were, I'd take you and Trent to the mall. Maybe we could go to the park together. That would show you," she said as she changed.
"I think I'll pass on more time in public, thank you," he said and headed out of the room.
"Where are you going?" she asked.
"He needs a diaper. You want him to pee all over you in your sleep?"
----
Trent slept through the night, never waking up with a nightmare. He woke in the morning with a heavily soaked diaper again, so Sara gave him a bath while Grissom made breakfast.
Sara brought him down and they all ate breakfast before Grissom went upstairs and grabbed all of his bags from the guest room. When he brought them down, Nick's sister was in the living room waiting.
She said she didn't have enough time to stay and chat, but the next time she was back in Vegas, they were more than welcome to keep Trent for another weekend if they wanted.
Grissom was quick to agree to that and Sara went along with it. Trent cried when his mother took him from Sara, and cried even more when he realized they were leaving. Grissom carried the bags out to her cab and said good-bye, giving Trent a hug before they took off. Heading back into the house, he noticed the silence right away.
Sara was sitting on the couch with the dog when he got back in the living room. He sat next to her and sighed.
Sara noticed his mood. "What's wrong with you?"
"I'm gonna miss him. You know you will, too. "
"Maybe," she said. "But you see why I don't want kids now?"
"I do." He nodded.
"The nightmares, the pee, the messes, the food, the screaming, the public displays, the clothes, the attitudes, and all the other stuff that you didn't get to experience, Grissom. Just think about the stuff we missed out on because of what he could do for himself. Think about what yesterday would have been like for you if I would've borrowed a baby."
He scoffed. "Pretty insane, I'm sure."
"Exactly. So, we're not having a baby." She laughed.
"Not a baby," he said.
"Excuse me?"
He smiled. "Let's have two."
Two GSR babies…what fun that would be. (Of course, I doubt someone with the initials 'Carol Mendelsohn' would ever allow it.)
Hope you enjoyed it. Have fun reviewing while you continue going insane between now and Thursday.
thegreatbluespoon