"Let's just call it a quits. No one is defeating Lil' Hunter today," Melting mumbled. His flesh slowly dripped over his exposed jaw. More muscle slid over his other eye and he fell over into a deep slumber.
"Normally, I'm quick to disagree with you, Melting, but today I think you're right," Fish replied, watching Plant limp towards a plump maggot carcass. Vines tiredly spread through the desert soil, the creature stretched, then dove maw-first into the fresh kill. Everyone kept to themselves, like usual. Crystal sat polishing her robust forearm. Eyes toyed with his pet maggot. Rebel stared across the darkened horizon. Chicken sat quietly near the TV. Steroids was perched on his tree trunk, heavily invested in a novel he never seemed to finish. Rogue tinkered with her bulky Blast Armor. Yung Venuz spat money out of his mouth, watching the bills flutter to the blue sand. Robot's optical sensor glowed a light red, inactive. Near Fish was Horror, who idly levitated in sphere form. And as he watched the group, Fish realized this was what they always did. Every night. Suddenly he became conscious of the chords of his own guitar playing. He looked down to see his own hands methodically strumming against the labored strings! Shocked, Fish dropped the guitar, breaking an odd silence with a hollow thump. The mutants stopped and looked at him, as if he had broken some law that still bound their post-apocalyptic world together. Robot came back online, Eyes let his maggot squiggle away, Plant looked from his meal, and Horror splashed back into his normal shape.
"What's up, Fish?" Crystal demanded. She looked at him quizzically.
"I think we should have a campfire story," he said solemnly, setting his guitar against his log.
Melting rolled out of his slime cocoon and sighed, "Must you drop your whole guitar just to say-"
"What about?" Steroids urged, his interest suddenly captured. Now everyone was listening, even Chicken, who had turned off the TV and rotated her whole body in slow motion to face Fish. It was his moment to shine.
"Uhh...let's...have Eyes pick tonight's," Fish stammered, smiling nervously at the blue mutant. Eyes rolled. Everyone knew he couldn't speak, but only see. The group figured Fish had just said something silly, and they all returned to their routines. Maybe he was just acting dumb, Fish thought. But as he involuntarily reached for his guitar, he said, "Wait. I have something to tell you all."
"It's just a story I have. Not sure if it's as interesting as your book, Steroids," he looked at the mass of muscle. Steroids didn't reply. He just set his book down.
"Well anything is more interesting than these tapes," chirped Chicken. "I've seem each about fifty times or more."
"And I guess I didn't need that sleep anyway," yawned Melting. He rubbed his eye sockets with a dripping palm. "We'll probably just wake up early tomorrow."
"Does Robot have data of this story?" Robot inquired.
"I don't believe so, friend, It is one I made sure no one knew until now."
"This should be rich," hummed Yung Venuz, vacuuming up his currency. He scurried near the campfire and sat down next to Crystal. "Lights, got a fire, camera, we ain't got one, Action. Begin. Now."
Fish stared deeply into the fire, a new silence encaptured them all. "Now Crystal, you were the first mutant of this group to join me," he began softly, "And I know I never told you, but there was a mutant with me before I brought you here. It was never that important, so I might as well tell you all about him now. He was an elder from a farming clan. As I raced along the desert trail one day, I saw a group of bandits raiding his group. I watched as they unleashed a scorpion pack upon the territory. Usually I would just run and take the long way to the sewers, but something had to be done, and maybe the clan would help me along my journey. So I pulled my revolver from my holster and-"
"Which clan was this?" Rebel asked. She was known for having the strangest questions. It stirred Fish how frugal the ex-bandit could be with few words. Some of the mutants looked at her strangely, wondering what she meant and why she stopped Fish's tale.
"I believe it was the clan of Fire Bear," Fish said casually, not really sure himself. Rebel was glad her wrappings concealed her astonished face. Could this elder be the phantom her allied spies had told her about? Fish went on.
"As I was saying, I decided to flank the raiding party. There were five scorpions and about eight bandits hanging around a line of prisoners. A big bandit rose out of the ground as well, and ordered the executions to begin.
I entered the fray and managed to kill the scorpions wreaking havoc, but when I rolled to the villagers, all but one was dead. The old man. I rolled away from the leader's barrage of fire when it saw me, but then the man suddenly held a staff. Before I could wonder how he kept it so well hidden, he began fighting off his executioners and their boss. I watched this master work his craft, as he dodged their scopes and swept them off their feet. His staff was edged with some sort of red paint and it stained their garbs, but I thought nothing of it then. It only took about two minutes for him to stun 'em all. He approached me, reconcealing his weapon. The man's face wasn't wrinkly...it was actually smooth from the winds." I closed my astonished mouth shut and asked him about the paint.
He said, "That is a pheromone that will attract the maggots. They will ignore my people. We must leave now, the bandits will return in great magnitude." Suddenly a large portal opened in front of us, showing no point of destination and we were sucked in without choice. The portal transported us to another part of the desert, except much closer to the sewers. This is why I tell you all to kill every enemy you see. The portals will open for you. It is much faster than walking the entire trail.
We were not successful in finding the Throne, as he was no mutant, though we've gotten farther than any of us have ever reached. Cutting our losses, we retreated down the trail and struck up a camp here."
Fish slid off his log and snuggled into the light sand. He was happy to have changed the course of the night. What would they have done without him?
"I don't know if you realize this," Rogue began. "But that story isn't over. Where is that kickass warrior elder now and what happened to him?"
"Robot agrees," concurred Robot. "There is no end to this data log for Robot to cognize. But he seems 'kickass' as well."
"Well," Fish sat up again, burrowing half of his body in the sand. "It's pretty late and I think sleep would-". He blinked twice, staring at the barrel pointed at his skull.
"Please continue, Fish," said Rebel, held her revolver steady. Two allies ran up to join her. "Continue to lie to us. You killed the man. Didn't you? You killed the Savior Phantom. Where is he buried? You fool, he is the brother of the great Proto Mutant that once lived!"
"But I didn't kill him!" Fish implored. "I swear, the man just went off one day and I never saw him again." The group stood there growing tense, wondering when would be the right time to disarm Rebel and her posse. Never before had a mutant quarrel ever gotten to an accusation at gunpoint. They were all better than that. But no one knew what to expect from Rebel.
Suddenly the fire blew out and Rebel shot at Fish in a panic. He groaned and then there was a brief silence. Another voice rumbled.
"I shall finish the fish mutant's story, for I am the Savior. And your fire. And, you're all in danger. I'd rather we not have questions, we have a long day ahead."
"Perfect," sighed Melting.