Post Blue
Author: Bea Mendes
Pairing: Luna Lovegood x George Weasley
Genre: Drama/Hurt/Comfort
Rated: T
Summary: George and Luna are more damaged than one could believe possible. They have changed but can they find a status quo to suffer less?
Disclaimer: Harry Potter and it's characters are not mine. Don't sue me.
A/N: Hey there! It's been a while since my last update on anything! Anyway, here I am at the Airport Charles de Gaulle waiting for my flight back home and writing this new story. Amazing how I can write when I'm bored out of my mind.
Every song part separates time. The first part is somewhere when they were at Hogwarts (probably on Harry's fourth year... so Luna's in her third and George on his sixth). None of the parts happen on the same day (with only one exception). From one to the other it can pass a day, a week or even months. Time isn't important in this story.
I hope you like this new one. I didn't have time to check it for mistakes because my battery is gonna die anytime now...
"You sitting there wondering what it's all about
You let other women make a fool of you
Why don't you do right, like some other men do?"
Why Don't You Do Right, by Peggy Lee
She watched him in a distance. She watched his foolish smile when he talked to the women next to him. To other people, she might be day dreaming - as they always thought she was -, she might be searching for some invisible non-existent creature flying around, but she wasn't. She was looking at him, studying him. She was watching the beginning of another disappointment - for him and for her.
"Someone that you think that you can trust
Is just, another way to die"
Another Way To Die, by Alicia Keys & Jack White
He was in a self destructive mode, she figured, but no one seemed to notice. George Weasley perhaps would never recover from the blow of losing Fred: his twin brother, his best mate, his other half, his everything. But no one seemed able to see the deepness of what that meant. No one seemed to understand what the loss had done to him.
Three years had passed and he managed to put up smiles when people asked if everything was okay and even when people didn't. He could convince his friends ad family that he had recovered, but he would never convince her, she always saw behind the faux smiles, the forced laughs. She always saw how light-less were his eyes.
She watched as he now sat in a corner of a muggle bar, a filthy, dark and dangerous muggle bar - somewhere where he hoped no one would recognize him, somewhere he could drink, hoping to forget everything even if just for a few hours. She got up from the stool where she sat, got her glass from the bar and walked to his table. She sat down and only took off her hood when he looked up from his drink.
"Luna." His voice was just a rough whisper from all the emotions and drinks he had consumed. "Get out of here."
She didn't say anything nor did she leave. The girl merely lifted her glass and drank her drink of choice. He smirked when he realized what she was drinking.
"Gin Tonica. It's a big girl's drink." He said with a scolding tone of voice, but she didn't mind. At least he was being sincere.
"I've told you. I'm a big girl now." Her voice wasn't seductive as many women he knew would have used to say those same words. She whispered darkly to him and looked around the bar.
"Actually, you've never told me why you suddenly became a grown up. You know, clothes aren't the x factor to change one person from being a child to becoming an adult." He said looking up and down her body, checking out her clothes.
"I have seen the same
I know the shame in your defeat"
The Cave, by Mumford & Sons
Another day. Same discussion. Same bar. She wore dark jeans that clung to her body, black stilettos and a navy blue top. Definitely not the kind of clothes she wore at Hogwarts.
"I'll tell you my story when you open up. That's our agreement." She had grown up in those years. "Clothes are not what made me change." She made eye contact with him and for a few seconds they had truly connected, but he broke the connection, not wanting to talk just yet.
"The bitter sweet between my teeth
Trying to find the in between
Can't help myself but count the flaws"
Young Blood, by The Naked and Famous
"You can't run away forever, George." She finished her sentence and drank the rest of her alcohol, immediately ordering another to the bartender.
"Neither can you." He turned on his stool to look fully at her.
She slowly raised her gaze to him and he could see how the tone of the blue in her eyes had changed, they were darker, never again naïve. Just like his own eyes.
"You better chase your cares away
Get ready for the judgment day
The Lord is waiting to take your hand"
Get Happy, by Judy Garland
"Tell me, Luna." George nearly shouted on the empty street to the woman walking in front of him. Her steps were heavy from all the alcohol she had ingested. "Stop being so secretive and tell me what the fuck happened!" He watched as she continued to walk away and he decided to be the jerk that he now was and make her stop. "It's not like people don't know what happened when you got caught by those Death Eaters."
That made her stop dead in her tracks immediately and she nearly fell forward. She turned so slowly that for a moment George became afraid of what he would see in her face. His fears confirmed when her now dark blue eyes fell on him. He had never seen such hatred or distrust in someone's eyes. And that killed another piece of him.
"You don't know what happened." She said the words like they were venom.
She walked closer to him and raised her hand to smack him in the cheek. At the same moment as her hand made contact with his skin, he disapparated them to his apartment. When her feet touched the ground, she feel forward - clearly not expecting that. He caught her in his arms and he slowly turned his head to look at her.
"Though you caught me and you know why
What's the matter, you hurt yourself?
Opened your eyes and there was someone else?
Why you wanna blame me for your troubles?"
Undertow, by Warpaint
She wore no make-up. Just like before, but nothing like before. The red-head looked at her face, studying her, trying to catch the differences and recognize what remained the same. He thought it was weird to see how the things that looked to be just the same were the ones that had changed most.
"I'm ready, Luna." He spoke with sincerity and she began to wonder when they had changed places. "Are you?"
She slowly and gently shook her head. She would never be ready to talk about what had happened to her. But she couldn't let that get in her way.
"We're in a mess
We are under the sheets and you are killing me"
Under The Sheets, by Ellie Goulding
"What happened with you?" He asked in a soft tone, trying to encourage her, but at the same time as he wanted to hear her, he didn't want to find out what made her like this.
"They raped me." Her answer was simple, but that he already knew.
A few months after the War was over, a group of runaway Death Eaters caught her and held her captive for almost one month. Rape was expected with them. They were given the Kiss soon after trial. But she changed.
"I knew them. I studied with them. And they still did that." The group was made of five Death Eaters; three of them were from Slytherin - two of them (twin brothers) were in the same year as Luna. The other two were the boys parents. "I even helped them sometimes with study!" She said it all through gritted teeth.
He kept looking forward, while she looked at her glass. She wondered briefly if she could break it since she was holding it so strongly.
The room was silent, minutes or hours neither could tell nor neither cared. She looked up from her glass and turned slowly to look at him. He saw some tears had left her eyes, but she wasn't sobbing - most likely, she didn't even notice them.
"I had everything, opportunities for eternity
Your eyes, your eyes, I can see in your eyes, your eyes
Everything in your eyes, your eyes
I'll never be good enough"
Make Me Wanna Die, by The Pretty Reckless
"They broke me. They took my free will and ruined me for life. They made me want to die." She said it all in a whisper and he almost missed her words.
"One month is a long time." He said trying to create an excuse to what she had just said.
"I wanted a way out." He looked at her with a raised eyebrow and she returned the look. "One way or the other. And I almost got one in the second week."
George let her words sink in and asked the inevitable question that she knew would follow. She didn't answer him with words, she merely pointed her wand to her wrists, taking out the glamour she always wore there. Big, ugly scars were everywhere until her elbow, both arms.
"That's why I changed." She turned away and took a last sip from her glass. She put her poker face back on and he could see her walls were up again. "Your turn to open up."
"I know you've suffered but I don't want you to hide
I'll make you feel pure, trust me, you can be sure
I want to reconcile the demons from your past
You may be a sinner but your innocence is mine"
Undisclosed Desires, by Muse
"What are you so afraid of?" She yelled at him.
"You don't understand, Luna. Leave it alone." He growled back at her and took a step back not wanting to have this discussion with her.
"You're absolutely right I don't understand!" She was getting more and more frustrated by the second. "Help me understand it!"
Without notice he turned to the wall and punched it. Not satisfied, he grabbed a nearby chair and threw to the opposite side of the window, breaking it in several pieces. Luna stood back and out of the way, but satisfied since he was being true again.
The clock ticked and the minutes went by, taking his anger with them. His clothes were disheveled, like his hair. Tears were running down his face but the sobs stopped a long time ago. Luna approached him slowly, not wanting him to run away from her, not wanting him to put his walls back up - even though hers were still there. She touched his face and for a second he saw a glimpse of what she was, of the naïve and all smiles Luna Lovegood.
They couldn't help their bodies from approaching and eventually the soft kisses became hot passionate ones.
"They taped over your mouth
Scribbled out the truth with their lies
I rather waste my life pretending
Than have to forget you for one whole minute"
CrushCrushCrush, by Paramore
"I don't want you to run away." The seven words were pronounced slowly and were all but a whisper, as if he was saying the seven deadly sins. He didn't want her to wake up. He didn't want the unexpected and fragile peace to end before time.
"I didn't runaway from me." Came her also whispered answer. She slowly turned over so that they could face each other while still laying. "You didn't runaway when I told you the truth and you didn't runaway when you saw me... All of me."
He raised his hand and let it rest on the big scar she had on the left hip and gently stroke it. Hating the people who did that to her.
"I miss him." He shook his head with a bit of force, frustrated. "That doesn't even begin to explain it. He was everything. He was me. It's like a part of me is dead. I don't know how I can breathe if his not breathing. It's not right. It shouldn't be like this. He was the creative one, the one who spoke without thinking, the fun one. I shouldn't be here alive. He should be here. I want him back so much, Luna. You have no idea."
She shifted positions and nestled him against her naked chest, running one hand through his hair and the other up and down his arm, in a soothing way. He hugged her and continue to speak the words he wanted to speak since Fred died.
"A friend in need is a friend indeed
Our thoughts compressed, which makes us blessed
Days, dawning, skins, crawling
Pure morning, pure morning, pure morning, pure morning"
Pure Morning, by Placebo
They spent most nights awaken, looking at each other's eyes. George always put a hand on her scarred hip and she would let her hand touch his chest, quietly hoping that maybe (and that meant a rough maybe) they could begin to move on from the terrible things that happened to them.