Summary: As his life slips away, Mal confronts the truth. Based on "Out of Gas."

A/N: I had to re-upload this b/c there were way too many typos. Serves me right for trying to post things in a hurry. Anyway, this is the 1st of many Fireflyfanfics will come and my 1st non-anime fanfic. Mal is my hero. ---Hana Li

Disclaimer:Firefly and its awesome characters belong to the brilliant Joss Whedon, not me.

The Cold, Hard Truth

Damn the floor's cold! Mal thought even though he couldn't do anything about it. "Gausaang haitung guzoeng. Gimcaa jeonghei gungjing."

Moments of his life—that is, the life that was part of Serenity—flashed before his eyes, reminders of what he had to fight for. Oh, what the hell was he talkin' about? This wasn't so gorram battle. Or was it? He was fightin' a losing battle against death. Mal smiled to himself. I sure know how to pick 'em. At least he wasn't draggin' anybody with him this time. It's all my fault and I'm gonna die for it.

Freezing, running out of air, loosing too much blood—those weren't the most appealing ways to die, but it's not like he deserved anything good. He was the one who didn't Kaylee buy the part, and he was dumb enough to get shot. He ain't no saint nor hero, that's for sure; but he wasn't so bad aguy…maybe.

Suddenly Mal wanted to say something to each of the crew, show them that he…well, cared. Zoe, Wash, Kaylee, Inarra, Jayne, Book, and even Simon and River—they were all important. Damn, when did he get so sentimental? Although one might say that he was always that way, being so attached to this ship. "Gausaang haitung guzoeng. Gimcaa jeonghei gungjing."

Then, a thought occurred to him: who the hell did he think he was? Was he goin' to just lie down and die? Hell no. He had found it: the strength to get off the floor and fix the damn engine. He wasn't sure where it came from since he was the type that rarely gets moved by words or deeds. Maybe it was his unwillingness to die alone in the cold. Maybe it was his determination to prove that Serenity wasn't just fei wu. No point in tryin' to figure that out. All he had to do was get the catalyzer in place. Easy.

Despite the shot of adrenaline, Mal was losing too much blood. It took the remainder of his energy to get back to the bridge. There was red upon his fingers and red in front of him. He could almost touchthe button. His vision was fading, and he felt himself sinking to the cold floor again. Although he anticipated the impact, he tried to resist it. No, they have to come back…I need them. I don't want to be alone…

---

Numbness and voices—those were the two things Mal sensed when he woke up. His body resisted movement,but the familiarity of the voices made him forget that. His eyes were sensitive to the bright light, but he saw them-- Simon, Book, Inara, Jayne, River, Wash, and Zoe. "Welcome back, sir."

He must have lost his mind because he couldn't for the life of God figure out what he was doing on the bed, hooked up to Wash. Wait, they're not supposed to be here.

The appearance of Kaylee made him recall what happened. For once Mal didn't mind her chipperness at all. Pretty soon, everyone's sense of duty took over. He was slipping into the blackness again, but he wouldn't hit the cold, hard floor this time. Still, he didn't want them to leave. "You're all gonna be here when I wake up?"

The Shepherd sent him a reassuring glance. "We'll be here."

"Good. That's good…" Serenity wasn't just a ship he bought. It was a vesselmade up of the lives of those aboard it. They were the ones who made it not fei wu, and they showed him the truth: that he deserved somethin' decent. I'm not alone.

Anybody passing by would have seen the Captain sleeping peacefully with a tiny smile upon his face.