silent thoughts in his silent bubble

Steven thinks that it's all a joke.

A very very cruel joke.

He stares blankly at the scenery before him. The skies are pink today, a soft pink that always reminds Steven of his mother's complexion. The pink stretches from the end of the sea to the soft blue skies behind him. The two different skies mix together to form such a beautiful lilac that spreads across the boardwalk. The way the lilac sky winks and flickers reminds Steven of Garnet. He then rests his focus on the sea, which has turned pink because of how it reflects the pinkish skies. He lets the waves crash against the sand, only to return back to the endless sea.

All this... Rose or, rather, Pink Diamond saved them.

He considers that part of her. Of how she really tried to save everyone in this planet. Of how she fell in love when love wasn't a concept taught to gems with the planet. Of how she genuinely tried to protect her friends and encouraged them to be true to themselves. He can't hate his mother when he knows how much she has done for this planet, for the Crystal Gems, and for his dad as well.

But then, he considers the other half. He sees how selfish her actions are. He remembers how Blue Diamond and even Yellow Diamond grieved over her death, even after so many centuries. He remembers Bismuth, and how torn she'd be if she'd know about this. Even Jasper, who was blinded by rage because of what she thought happened to Pink Diamond. And Pearl... how many eons, years? She's been trapped for so long, unable to tell anyone, unable to live without the sins crawling on her back.

The most selfish thing Pink did is how she simply left Steven with all this mess.

What is he supposed to do now that he knows all these?

He thinks of running away. Maybe he'll pick up Connie and his dad and they'll live in the countryside or Empire City? Anywhere but here. Everything's a mess, he doesn't know what to do at all. Given the fact that he's never really sure on what to do with his life. At least back then when everyone still knew Rose Quartz as just Rose Quartz, he understood he had the responsibility of protecting Earth, of helping corrupted gems. Now, when Pearl drops such a huge bomb, that he's not a Quartz but a Diamond, he doesn't know who he is anymore or what he's actually for. He feels betrayed.

You're going to be a human being.

He wishes it's as simple as that.

"Hey, kiddo."

Steven looks up to find his dad, already coming up to sit right next to him. Even if everything's too much, he can always count on Greg Universe to be the only stable thing in his life. Now, Steven's just glad that his dad is still alive, breathing right next to him without any secrets or mind blowing revelations about him.

The two Universes share a look before turning to face the sun, already slowly sinking to the sea. It's taking away the pinkish skies, ready to leave the world the starry night sky the residents have grown accustomed to. Steven is reminded of his mother yet again.

"Did you know?" Steven asks quietly. He wraps his arms around his legs gently, ready to take another bomb.

"No," his father replies. "I think she wanted to, though."

Steven sighs with relief. Turning his head to the side to face his father, he asks another question, "What do you think?"

"Well, it's shocking, sure," his father replies with a shrug. His legs are stretched in front of him, with his arms at the back to support his body and is looking back at Steven with a small smile. Like any father should, Greg's eyes are soft and understanding.

"She came to Earth to destroy it, dad."

"But she didn't."

"She lied to Garnet and every other Crystal Gem!" Steven says in an outburst. His eyes start tearing up as he whispers. "She's the reason for the whole Gem War... and why there's so many corrupted gems."

Greg sighs. "Rose... she probably did what she thought was right."

Steven looks back at the waves, watching it swallow the sand. He tells his father bitterly, "She didn't think of the consequences. And then she made me. She's gone and she's leaving it to me to fix this mess! I don't know what to do! Sometimes I just wish I didn't..."

Greg immediately grabbed Steven's shoulder and forced his son to look at him. His usual relaxed eyes are gone, and is replaced with such a tensed and aggravated stare. He scolds with passion, "Don't you ever think that, Steven! We... we'd be lost without you.

"Rose loved you. She loved every Crystal Gem and she certainly loved this whole planet. She tried her best to protect it. It's just sometimes..." Greg trails off, lowering his eyes. Inhaling, he tells his son sincerely, "We would do anything for the people we love."

Steven lets his eyes water. He sniffs as he remembers how he sacrificed himself to keep everyone he loves safe from Aquamarine. He remembers how Blue Diamond came to Earth to grieve for the one she loves even if she knows that there are consequences. He remembers all the times he spent with the Crystal Gems and his dad, and how they kept him safe because of their growing love for him. He thinks about everything Rose did, while reckless, just showed how much she's willing to do to keep everyone and everything she loves safe.

He hugs his father and his father hugs him back.

For this moment Steven thinks that maybe, just maybe, everything will be all right.

end

quick author's note: i might be one of the few people who still loves rose quartz/pink diamond. yeah, she's selfish and she was clearly reckless and she was horrible to pearl, but i understand that she did what she thought was right. she had the right intentions, but went about it the wrong way (like machiavelli once said: the end justifies the means). i hope the next episodes will be about pink diamond and her reasons why she acted that way but i doubt that. in the meantime, do you agree with me or not? what are your thoughts about the reveal?