Disclaimer: I don't own Degrassi.

Beta: The amazing and spectacular SixWs!


"Oh no, oh no," Eli looked down at the shiny, golden watch that weighed his wrist down in horror. He muttered incoherent words and phrases. Profanities flooded out of his mouth, causing Bullfrog to glance his way.

"Hey, now, where'd you learn words like that?" Eli ignored him and tapped at the clock with desperate energy, "I mean, I know that you didn't learn those words from me." And at that, Eli's head snapped up.

"What are you talking about? You're the one who has the mouth of a truck driver." Eli shook his head in aggravation and shimmied the wristwatch off the upper part of his arm, and shook it with vigor.

"Fair enough," Bullfrog said, shrugging his broad shoulders. He took another sip of his coffee and watched his son beat the watch against the edge of the wooden table, "You know, when I get angry, I don't usually beat inanimate objects against tables. But that's just me."

"But it's broken!" Eli wailed, his voice reaching an octave higher than his usual, "Clare's watch! It's broken! ...I broke it and-"

"Whoa, son, calm down-"

"I CAN'T," He shouted, his cheeks growing to be very red and his heart was racing inside his slight chest, "I can't calm down! This is the only part of her that I have left! And it's broken. Just my luck, right? Just my fucking luck. I mean, really? I think the world hates me. The world hates-"

"Stop it," Bullfrog snapped and Eli stopped rambling. Bullfrog wasn't one to get aggravated, "I need you to calm down. You have to think logically, Eli. I know this watch means a lot to you, but you need to think before you act."

Eli grimaced and turned his head away in slight anger, "Well, what do I do then, huh? Can you fix it?" His eyes brightened at his idea.

"No, no, no," Bullfrog said quickly, shaking his head, "God, no, Eli. I'll break that thing. But maybe-"

Eli suddenly gasped, "I know!"

"What do you kn-"

Bullfrog barely finished his sentence when Eli bustled out the door.

.

.

.

Light streamed through the open car window, causing the gold watch to send gold streaks across Elijah Goldsworthy's face. Ignoring the accessory on his wrist, Eli proceeded to drive, trying not to look at the golden watch that was causing him a lot of stress. He roughly turned right, cutting off two people, and drove faster than he ever thought he could. The windows were down and the wind was pulsing into the car, adding adrenaline in Eli's veins.

He had to do this.

Elijah Goldsworthy had to.

Because the watch had been reminding him of her. Instead of telling the time, the watch told him and showed him that he was no longer in her life. And he couldn't take it. It was causing a rip to form in his stomach, and it was slowly making its way to his heart, rip by rip. And slowly, he was realizing how much he built his life around her. He was realizing how much he depended on her.

He was realizing all sorts of things lately.

Eli knew that he was messed. He knew it more than anyone else. He had to live with himself, watch himself become nothing but a broken wall that had deteriorated over time. He had watched the world shine on, while he, the deteriorated wall, had let himself lose his shine. He was like a penny that had been dropped and kicked and stepped on. The copper that he had been born with had become a mild green color, covering any shine that he had left.

In all honesty, Eli had become a mess in the few months since he and Clare's break up. He found himself becoming a lump of nothing, becoming everything that he used to loathe. He hated those stupid, pathetic, heart sick people who could barely speak. And lately, that description completely defined him. To be frank, Eli was becoming a stuttering mess. Most of the time, he didn't even know what was coming out of his mouth or entering his mind. His life had turned into one big whirl of nothing, and he was spinning with it, unable to get his balance.

A car beeped loudly at him as he zoomed past the stop sign, not bothering to stop. He was a man on a mission and he could almost feel the watch pushing him to go faster. The weight of the watch was spreading into his body and his mind. It was more than the watch; it symbolized so much more.

Eli pulled up to the familiar driveway and grimaced as the memories flooded back to him.

"Could you be more smug?"

"Absolutely!"

He shook his head, trying to erase the memory of the simple past, and he walked up the stone steps. His feet felt like they were made of lead, but he kept moving, the broken watch on his wrist.

Taking a deep breath, Eli knocked loudly on the door; loud enough to wake the dog next door and make it bark. He grimaced and stepped back, so very tempted to run away. But instead, he raised his fist to knock again and suddenly, the screen door opened.

There stood Clare Edwards.

With his headphones around her neck. She had a little piece of him on her.

Eli gaped at her, his mouth hanging open. All the lines that he prepared on the way to her house, all the preparation he went through, slipped through his mind. Because she was so beautiful. She blinded him.

Clare cocked her head to the side and looked at him curiously. Eli shrugged the watch off his wrist and attempted to speak, "I-um-the-thing-...the watch." Eli finished, blushing madly.

"The watch?" Clare asked softly, raising her eyebrows.

"Dead. It's...dead." Eli muttered, waving his hands around like a mad-man, the watch swinging around in his loose grip.

"It's broken?"

Eli sighed and smiled. Clare Edwards always seemed to know what he meant, before he even knew.

He could be yelling in code and she'd still understand him.

"Come on in." Clare motioned with her finger for him to come in, but Eli stayed rooted to the spot.

"You have pretty eyes." Eli piped up, and mentally smacked himself. He wasn't supposed to say that. He was supposed to say thank you for letting him in, not...that.

But Clare merely blushed and looked down, seeming to understand what Eli was saying.

"You're welcome."


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