Questioning Everything Chapter 1, Constant Weather, a bleach fanfic

"It looks like it's going to rain"

"Huh?" the shinigami who had been nagging Hinamori about paperwork had nearly dropped all of his papers and had to catch himself at the last minute. Ever since the unspeakable war, Hinamori had been abnormally quiet or had the oddest random moments that still left the other shinigami questioning her sanity. But it was no question that she was still the best soul in soul society qualified for 5th division vice captain. That and Ichigo, who had become the captain for the 5th division after he helped to defeat Aizen, refused to have any other vice captain besides little Hinamori. Who were they to refuse the guy who saved them all?

"How can it rain? It's almost winter, and it rarely rains in soul society anyways. Not to mention it's sunny out." The poor shinigami must've looked comical with his work things hazardously close from falling all together and a look on his face that would seem like Hinamori had told him that dust bunnies would fall from the sky and do the hokey pokey instead of her nonchalant statement about the rain.

Hinamori took one look at the confused shinigami before her and mentally sighed. "I'll do the paperwork, after I come in. I'll just be a minute longer, don't worry." She gave him a small smile that completely washed away any doubt that still harbored in him, and after a crisp nod, he rushed in the office, papers falling after him as he muttered something about the cold.

As soon as the door shut behind him, Hinamori let the smile slide away and once again turned to the sky, an empty look on her face. Yes, it has been years since the war, since she had once smiled carelessly daily and spoke openly to any shinigami that would cross her path. Since… she had last spoken to Hitsugaya. That last though practically gripped her heart and slowly squeezed it into oblivion. She maneuvered her feet, which had been swinging carelessly beneath her, in front of herself, hands gripping her around her knees, in a defensive way. Heart beating and on the brink of tears, she began to remember every moment she had ever shared with Shiro, her Shiro. She stopped then, stopped remembering and started recalling that last thought. No, he wasn't her Shiro anymore, not since she abandoned him and betrayed them all. Maybe not physically or completely, but once she woke up all she could ever think about was still Aizen. About how he wasn't the one who was at fault. She even abandoned her job and division in the fatal time they needed her the most. It was those things that took away any right she had to call him hers, or call any of them her friends. She didn't even deserve the second chance she got from Ichigo and Rukia.

Finally the tears she had been fighting, and any guard she had kept up, gave way as a lone tear trickled down her cold cheek. That got her alert of her dark thoughts of the past. She quickly began to pick up her broken thoughts and lock away anything left of the past. After all, if it was too hard to remember you past, forget it. Right? Shaking her head, Hinamori looked up to the sun that betrayed her dreary mood and quickly destroyed all the evidence of crying. It hurt, even the mention of his name made her heart ache and her head spin. If it was this big of an effect on her, then what was she to do? Seeing him in person was hard enough with all the awkward looks and trying to mask her tears was mission impossible. Bottom line, she's weak. She doesn't want to be, but it's not like not wanting to be something changes anything. What's a girl to do when she's hurt anyone she ever loved? Forget; pretend like it never happened, like even the word past doesn't exist. It may be the cowards' way, but it's her only way. Or else, she'll just end up hurting them all again.

"Hinamori!" the young shinigami's voice drifted into the tranquil autumn's day disrupting any of her already broken thoughts. Mask back in place, Hinamori took her and her now shinning smile and climbed to her feet walking softly to the door. Her voice managed to sound calm and gentle unlike her last mental outburst a moment ago "Coming!"

She couldn't hurt anyone else. It was one thing that she couldn't risk.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Toushiro Hitsugaya sighed at the work on his desk, and turned towards the open window. The tranquil rain made peaceful noises that were never heard in winter. They calmed him down from his agitated mood that he hadn't been able to throw off since that morning. After nearly 20 minutes of the rain therapy, everything was interrupted with a loud bang of the door opening behind him.

"YO! Hitsugaya! What are you doing all in your little corner there!" a half drunk Matsumoto could manage to disrupt any peace, hell, a sober Matsumoto could manage that fine, but Hitsugaya still refused to give in to her loud, attention grabbing self. However it was a futile attempt, especially since she was literally inches away giggling at his sour puss face. "Hehe, if you scrunch your eyebrows any further," she hiccupped, "you'll have a uni-brow." He didn't seem amused at her drunken breath or immature speak and his features darkened, if it was possible. A smothered giggle was heard behind the two and Matsumoto immediately took a dramatic step backwards, allowing Hitsugaya to see his office behind her, and spoke in a louder voice than necessary. "See? Aya agrees with me!"

Said girl failed again at her attempt of trying to smoother any laughs. Her long, elbow length, reddish brown, slightly wavy, hair fell over a shaking shoulder, as she finally gave up and started to laugh to her hearts content. Silver eyes danced with merit and her lips gave way to a giant smile that warmed her heart shaped face. There was little doubt in any shinigami's mind that Ayaka Tsukino, 5th seat in the 10th division, was beautiful. Maybe not stunning, like Matsumoto, but she's definitely above pretty or cute. There was an argument that caught Hitsugaya's attention earlier on in the 10th division where some shinigami were fighting about if Ayaka was prettier that Hinamori. The very fact that they would compare the two sent Hitsugaya off in a deadly mode and as he neared he heard someone suggest that Ayaka has replaced Hinamori in his heart. Needless to say he had given them the worst look of their lives that would probably still haunt them in their nightmares for future years.

He was so caught up in his thoughts he didn't notice that Matsumoto had spoke to him. He gave her a raised eyebrow and she dramatically sighed. "I asked you what you where doing here all alone, and you never answered!" her voice made it seem like she was talking to a five year old, appose to her boss. Hitsugaya choose to ignore her tone of voice as he turned back to his window. "It's raining" he stated simply, in a calm voice that seemed to make sense of everything. Although to Ayaka, it seemed like one big question without an answer. Oddly enough, Matsumoto seemed to understand the deeper meaning, and sobered up in the span of two seconds. "Oh? That seems odd this late in the season." An almost motherly smile fell on her features. After a slow nod and one last look at the window, Hitsugaya turned towards the two girls with his usual cold air around him. The weird moment behind them, he spoke in his normal bored drawl, "Matsumoto, do I have to remind you again (for the 39th time today) that unless you finish your paper work soon your desk will collapse under the weight?" Matsumoto gave a thoughtful look and opened her mouth to speak a moment later. "Rhetorical question." Hitsugaya interrupted. Turning to the smaller girl he spoke colder to her than normally, "Tsukino." He paused, turning back to the window. Looking at her from the corner of his eye, the young girl tried to appear confident but under his gaze her mask started to slip. "Get back to work."

With that said, Matsumoto began to walk cheerfully back to her desk, clearly drunk again, and Ayaka disappointedly walked out of the office as slowly as she could manage. All of this was oblivious to Hitsugaya, who had once again turned to the window, gazing out with a thoughtful, almost sad, expression on his face. He had remembered how one girl had commented about the rain being amazing and dragged him out of his home to dance with her in the cold water. When asked why she simply smiled a smile that twisted his stomach and jumbled his thoughts. "Because," she said "were rejoicing for the flowers!" His right hand separated the outside world with himself by pulling a little wooden plank towards him, closing the window. Amazingly, all memories of the girl in the rain stopped instantly. Turning away from the window he returned to his desk, one thought left in his mind. "How could I replace a girl like that?"

It had been a stressful day at the office tonight. With some stupid misfile and an obsessively annoying subordinate of his freaking out and waving his arms around in a way that suspiciously looked like the dance his dad used to do. And since Rukia had banned him from physically harming anything that would cross his path for the next two weeks (as some stupid "anger management" technique) everything just seemed more nerve wracking. He had long since awaited coming home and just plopping down on his fluffy bed and not moving until dinner.

Unfortunately for him, his lovely wife destroyed his plans since she had started to bug him ever since he had gotten home. He had tried using a pillow to drown out her obsessive chatter but when that didn't work, he contemplated using the pillow directly on her. That would certainly solve that problem. However, before he could work out the kinks in his plan, he was punched in the arm by his wife.

"Have you listened to a word I've said, Ichigo?" Lifting his head from his pillow, he gave her a "are you kidding me" look and once again earned himself a punch. His left eye gave a considerably nice looking twitch, however Rukia gave it no attention as she began her rant all over again.

"Hinamori! Have you forgotten about your own vice captain that fast!" Glaring at her, he managed to look as dignified as someone can with a pout.

"My memory isn't that bad!" It was her turn to give him the un-approving look.

"You forgot we were married one day and tossed me out of bed." Her deadpan voice gave little room for argument, however that didn't stop him. "It was a big shock!" he claimed with a sour puss look of his own.

Rukia raised one eyebrow this time, an amused look on her face. "It was nine months after our marriage.

Glaring once again, Ichigo flopped down on the bed and continued to get comfortable in the fluffy mess of blankets and pillows. "So what about Hinamori?" he asked, yawing. She leaned against his figure, her back to his chest, and he immediately wrapped his arms around her lithe figure. "She hasn't been herself." She managed to mutter in a sad voice.

His eyebrows furrowed and he started to make circles with his thumb on her arm. "She seems fine at the office." A sigh escaped his wife's lips as she relaxed against him. "You're a guy, of course you wouldn't notice."

"Not all guys are clueless." He replied his voice slightly muffled from her hair. She smirked. "I'm not counting Ishida" Grumbling for a moment, he sighed getting somewhat serious, after all it did involve his vice captain. "Care to explain?"

After a long pause, Rukias soft voice (unlike her usual loud one, Ichigo thought) drifted into the spacious room. "She's been distant, ever since the war. You've never known her before, but the few times I met her, she was so kind that she would instantly dissolve any ones bad mood." She paused again, seemingly lost in memory. "I remember smiling for no reason, other than the fact that she was smiling." She heaved a long sigh.

"If she was really like that, then I could understand why you'd be shocked at her change." He thought back to the quiet girl with the sad smile back in his office. Frowning he held his wife slightly tighter, mentally praying that Rukia would never turn out like the current Hinamori. Rukia shifted slightly, so she could look Ichigo in the eye. "So what are we going to do?"

It was the question that they were both wondering, but as Ichigo's stomach grumbled loudly their thoughts were disrupted. It took three seconds until Rukia's laugh filled Ichigo's ears. She quickly jumped off the bed and headed towards the door. Still laughing she made her way to the kitchen. He smiled the smile that he reserved for Rukia alone, and laid back down on the bed and wondered just how they were going to help his quiet vice captain. However as a loud crash came from the kitchen, he deserted any attempt at sleeping to make sure his wife didn't burn down their house.