This was written to shoot the proverbial plot bunny in the head. The idea's been running through my mind for a while now and I've had it written in my notebook for even longer. I'm using this story as a template for later writings, but mainly it's just to see if I can successfully write a sub-plot into Harry Potter while still sticking to canon (well… most of canon anyway). I'm actually not sure if I'm going to continue this, but we'll see how it goes.

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter or any of it's affiliated characters/settings/plots. The Harry Potter series was written by J.K. Rowling and published by Bloomsbury. I hold no claim. And the quote(s) used/will be used, are not mine. If I haven't credited someone for the quote then I most likely cannot remember where it came from or who wrote it.

WARNING: Mild Slash! If this offends you then please hit that 'Back' button on the top right-hand corner of your browser window.

NOTHING BUT AN INTRUSION

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"Love is always an intrusion... And by it chance is made flesh, passion becomes reason."

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Hermione says that it's my fault the whole thing even happened. A view that I hotly contest (and rightfully so if you ask me!). I do (reluctantly) admit that I may have been one of the embers that contributed to the overall inferno, but I was in no way the spark that ignited the fire. That was 120% her own doing, regardless of what she says. Which, believe me, she actually says a lot.
After reciting the 132 (yes, one hundred and thirty two!) reasons why exactly it was my fault, she then moved on to the 298 reasons why Fred, George, Angelina, Katie and Alicia were also to blame. In other words, the whole Gryffindor Quidditch team, minus Oliver Wood of course (please note the extensive use of sarcasm here).
You see, despite everything he's done (which the Chaser girls are still sore about), and despite everything that he's currently doing (which the twins are still queasy about), Hermione swears by Merlin that Oliver is the innocent victim in all this. She gave me 35 fairly good reasons as to why this was so and had half of Gryffindor to support her. I told her she was stark raving mad and that if anything Oliver was the reason we were in this mess in the first place. I then gave her one extremely good reason why and had 3 and a half houses backing my case.
She's still not speaking to me.
Ron on the other hand doesn't know whether he should be shaking our hands or strangling our necks.

If you ask Fred and George about it, the first thing they'll say is that they did it out of selfless love for their own brother, their own flesh and blood. That of course, is a complete blatant lie. If you ask them again and give them what me and Ron like to call the 'Hermione Glare of Truth Version 2.3Ô' they'll probably shift in their seats a little, give each other pointed looks and then sigh theatrically, after which they will finally admit that A) they just wanted to see what Percy would act like when he finally started enjoying himself, or B) it sounded like fun and they just wanted to wreck some havoc. No matter how truthful they sound, believe me, they're lying through their teeth!
If you ask Angelina, Katie or Alicia about it, they'll probably start to fidget, blush a little, look down at their feet in embarrassment before saying (with just the slightest hesitation) that they 'just wanted to see Oliver happy and since he obviously didn't know what exactly would make him happy, as his star Chasers, it was their duty to make him see what exactly would make him happy and provoke him into getting it.' Don't listen to them. Every word they told you is an absolute, unmitigated falsehood.
The only reason they did it was because they were complete and utterly selfish! They did it for no-one else except themselves. They did it because they put their own needs before everyone else's. I should know, I helped them for the exact same reasons they did it. Let me tell you now, we all did it for one reason and one reason only. Your probably wondering just who the hell I am and what exactly I have to do with this.
My name is Harry James Potter. I'm currently a 3rd year Gryffindor at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. And I did it because I didn't want to die.

If you have any familiarity with the magical world, you'll know me as the 'Boy-Who-Lived'. I have no idea who coined that inane title (I thing I'll ask Hermione when she starts talking to me again. Because frankly, I'd like to kick the shit out of whichever bastard it was) but when they (un)officially dubbed me that, they must have only been thinking about Dark Lords. To give them credit though, I don't think anyone realized that my own Quidditch Captain would try and kill me (however inadvertently).
At the beginning of term everyone kept thinking that Sirius Black would try and break in to Hogwarts to attempt to kill me. The Slytherins were betting 3 to 1 that I wouldn't survive the encounter. I admit at first I was a bit scared, but that all changed soon enough. By the second week back at school I was praying that Sirius Black would kill me already because I didn't want to die at the hands of one Oliver Wood. Now don't get me wrong, Oliver's a great bloke and a bloody good Keeper too. But, well… Things just got a bit… Difficult, you know? To be fair though, I guess it was his last year, but still!!
Okay, okay I'm getting a bit ahead of myself. This all really started on the last day of August, the day before we were due to start school. And it all began with a rather nonchalant comment from Ron of all people.

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- Des.