I throw up a rock and load my bow as the birds soar up from the trees. My kill is already in my sights and I take two down with one arrow. I load again and shoot, my fingers sore and numb but still perfect aim. I manage to take down another three before they are too far to even see. I rock back and forth on my feet for a few minutes, knees tucked to my chest and arms crossed over them. The nightmare last night was awful. It was about my father…Peeta tried to sleep in the same room as me but he woke up screaming and Haymitch ran in to take him out. We've been living in Snow's old mansion, which is nice, but it's not home. Sometimes I have to remind myself that I don't have a home anymore. Peeta and I have "counseling" sessions, which basically means we sit in a room together and talk about all the good things that have happened. It usually ends with one of us in tears.

I ran out last night after Haymitch took Peeta away. There's a huge woods behind the mansion which always refreshes me because I've never been in it before. Anywhere else just reminds me of some awful thing but here, I am only conscious of the cold wind in my face and the sweet smell of wet snow. I finally stand up and find it hard to walk because of my numb legs. I hobble down the hill and back into the valley, my boots crunching across the snow. I try and shoot a squirrel but it darts in some thorn bushes and I just end up losing an arrow. I tromp back to the house to see Peeta standing at the back door on the balcony. I don't say anything, but climb the stairs up and enfold myself in his arms, my bow dropping to the ground. He holds me tight, and I know that no matter what happens when we're together, I can always come back to his beating heart and know that in whatever condition he is in, he's still breathing and alive.

I clean my game, with my feet hanging over the side of the porch, teaching Peeta silently how to get out the good meat. He has been begging for me to take him hunting but Haymitch says it's a terrible idea and will probably bring back the Games memories since it's the woods. So I go alone. Until Peeta is better, I will always go alone. I am frightened that I will find Gale there, and if I do, I don't think anything will stop me from putting an arrow through his heart. I don't know where he is or if he has family or friends. All I know is that he vanished after the war ended and we claimed the Capitol. Peacekeepers were kept in custody until we could sort the crazed from the normal and figure out who wasn't trying to kill me or Peeta. Then we started moving in Districts. 13's supplies was shipped out to poorer Districts, as well as a lot of other things from the Capitol. The last public announcement I made was that we were planning to make each District equal and each person would have the same rights. The people loved it and many volunteered to help. I begged Haymitch to let me go and get away from the Capitol for a while, but he said I needed sleep and minimal stress. I don't really do anything but hunt and have sessions with Peeta, but sometimes, we will bake something together or just sit and talk. It feels like heaven but with the exception of the idea that he may lash out at me at any time.

We finish cleaning the game and Haymitch calls us inside. The house is the most elegant I have ever been in before. Almost everything is made of marble (a rich delicacy in even the Capitol) and shined to perfection. There are ten bedrooms, all lavished with beautiful art pieces, queen sized beds, and many pieces of expensive furniture. I hate it all. The kitchen is the only bearable place in the house, because Peeta will help me create amazing foods. He seems calmest there, especially when we do bread or cakes. I like to watch him frost, but sometimes he has to leave because he gets reminded of the first Games and his camouflage.

Now Haymitch has us sit down in the carpeted sitting room with Prim. After she almost died in the explosion, I worked my hardest to keep her safe. She wanted to go help and heal the wounded with my mother but I forbade it in case there was a "leftover attack" as Haymitch calls it. Which means that people still hate Peeta and I for what we did and still want us dead.

Haymitch turns on the huge holographic TV and Prim cuddles up next to me. She is older now, but I still feel the terrified little girl from the reaping when she's with me. My mockingjay pin flashes on TV and the words read across the screen:

Since the war, we have been working tirelessly to help our Districts become equal and happy. Now we are delighted to show you the beautiful progress in District 11.

Videos after videos played of the almost completely transformed District. The big fence had been taken down totally, workers were given better conditions and fed three meals a day, (and now crops were coming in better than before because of the worker's happiness), and the whole area just seemed fresher and newer. The houses looked less beat up, the food looked nicer and almost everyone looked a little plumper.

"They've been filming since District 13 went down there and dropped off supplies and workers," explains Haymitch, "Good isn't it?"

"Fantastic," says Peeta, gripping my hand. "It looks almost brand new." I nod, a little stunned by the progress. Prim hugs me.

"We'll need you to make a public announcement tonight," says Haymitch, "We'll film it and send it off to every District, to let them know how you're feeling about everything. Might add a little personal stuff in there too?" I look at Haymitch. His tone is so much more business-like and his usual grump is gone. He doesn't even sound like he's had a pinch of scotch.

"Okay," I say, tucking my feet under me. "Read from the cards?" He shrugs.

"Effie's not here." He stands and walks out, a depressing mood settling over the room. Effie had been found dead in one of the prisons. I was infuriated because she had done nothing wrong. Haymitch didn't even try to calm me down, but got horribly drunk and ended up in the hospital. Peeta didn't see the body but was told and spent a whole two days in silence. After I got over my first horrible feelings, I saw that Haymitch was putting some of his anger into his work and snapped at me often. He calmed down considerably but something told me he had a special connection with Effie that neither I nor Peeta ever had. When I tried to ask him, he just shrugged me off and said love was stupid.

But he was a stupid man, so why not?