Mi Amor

By Demon-Child.

A/N: Just a small note, warning that this is what I consider implied slash (with talk of slash, but no graphics), and it didn't turn out how I wanted it. I do not own HP. Oh, and hopefully, you know who the other guy is. Bye!



If someone were to tell me years ago that I would have been with you, holding you, making love to you, I'd laugh at them and ignore that idea. I didn't expect for this to happen, I didn't expect for us to fall in love. You were the guy everyone wanted; I was the guy no one wanted. You chose me. I still haven't figured out why, but you came up to me, and asked me out. Not anyone else, but me.

We went on our date, where we shared a milkshake, and laughter. It was not then, but soon after that I realized what we had, what we could be. So, we started to see each other. We'd sneak around, finding the strangest hours of the night to just be together, to be able to stay in each other's arms for all eternity. Nothing could stop us. We were in love.

Then, it happened. You asked me if it was okay to come out to your friends about us. I was unsure, because they never liked me. Naturally, you got your way, and you invited them to your room, where I was. You gently broke it to them that you were with me. They didn't take it well, and they left you. I held you for hours as you sobbed. I wanted to hurt them for making you cry, but instead, I talked to them. You had me wrapped around your little finger. I would have done anything for you, and I did. I went to them, and begged for them to make up with you.

They came, and you guys were friends again. They claimed to be able to deal with the fact that I was with you, when in reality, they hated the idea. They didn't bother us, and let us stay together.

Graduation came for you, and you nervously sat in my arms, as you told me what you wanted to do. I stood by your side, as you told the world that you didn't want to be a Quidditch star, or an Auror, but instead, you wanted to be a writer. I stood by you. What can your friends say? I was there for you. I went with you from editor to editor, from publisher to publisher as you tried to publish your first book, the now infamous A Mother's Love. I stayed up with you on those long nights that you tried to write, and frustrated, you threw the papers a few times. Was I not there for you?

And then, when you had that book tour, I went with you. I gave up everything I had going on, just so that I could be with you. When your goddaughter, Alexis, was born, I helped you to hold her for the first time, and I assured you that everything would be alright, that if anything were to happen to her parents, I would help you to take care of her. I stayed by your side at the baptism, as you were officially an Uncle. And then, when you started to write your second book, I assured you that it would be perfect, no matter what. On those long nights where you couldn't sleep for one reason or another, I held your hand until you fell asleep. I sang to you, and assured you that I would always love you.

When your book sales weren't doing so good, I listened to you complain for hours about how you worked so hard on that book. I was there for you; I never ever left your side. When you came to me, wanting a family so badly, I agreed just for you. I went with you to the adoption agency, and I watched as you decided you weren't ready for a child, and I didn't disagree with you. Never did I disagree with you.

When your mentor died, I went to the funeral with you. I held you, as you cried for your loss. I did not shed a tear for him, but I almost did for you. I wanted for you to be okay, so I went and got help for you. I stayed by your side those long hours of the night when you woke up, crying for him. And then, your friends accused me. You didn't do anything, but watched as they accused me of doing something to you that you knew I would never do. They accused me of raping a teen.

I was accused by the one person I loved the most in my life that I raped someone else. And you know what, you didn't do anything. You just let them send me to court, and throw me in jail, to later discover that I was innocent. I was innocent, and yet you knew that, didn't you? You just let your friends get the best of you.

And when I got out of jail? When I came home, only to find that you had left me for another man? Do you have any idea what that did to me? You don't, do you? It ruined me. I reverted to drinking every night. It didn't matter what, as long as there was something for me to forget you. You never noticed, you were too busy fucking some other guy. I wouldn't call it making love...oh, no. It's not. It's something that I could do without hearing. The man I thought would always stay by my side like I did his was with another man. And now, I get an owl, asking me to come to your wedding? What the hell?

For the only time in my life, I cried for you. I lay on the bed we used to share, and I found myself crying for you. I wanted so badly for you to come home, so that we could be what we were before, two lovers. A part of me knew that we could never be again. However, I stayed in that bed, crying for you. I cried until I could no more. No one came to my side to reassure me that everything would be okay.

No, you were the only one who could have ever done that. But no, you weren't there for me. Do you remember all those times that I was there for you? I guess not. For the day came, where you became his. March 14, 2001. The one day I absolutely dreaded had come, the day where everything we had would be gone.

I honestly considered going, but a part of me knew it would do no good. I lay in our old bed once more, as I held the one thing I cherished. It was the teddy bear you gave me when we first started going out. You said I could do with a teddy, so you gave it to me. I remember you naming it Brownie, although I never asked why. I held that teddy close to me, as I sobbed in our bed. Miles away, you were saying 'I do'. I sobbed until I could no more, for the one I lost was marrying another.

Brownie was covered in tears and snot, as I eventually cried myself to sleep. That night, I dreamed of you. I dreamed that you would come knocking, with your hair soaking wet, and your clothes drenching, as you begged for me back. However, I woke the next morning and I saw nothing.

This went on for many nights, as I stayed in my house, crying myself to sleep. Finally, almost a year later, I left my house. I packed the things I would need, and I left. Never did I turn back to the life we had, as I sold my house, and moved far away. Never did I expect to see Molly Weasley one day inside of a muggle mall. She told me everything, how you and your husband were expecting a child soon. That tore me apart. The child we planned on having, you were having with another. I went back to my new apartment, laid on my new bed, and this time, I had no tears to cry. Instead, I began to write. Remember your first book, where you stayed up for hours trying to finish it? I didn't take me that long. It came naturally. I wrote what came to my mind, and I dedicated the book to you.

Of course, you never knew that, because you were with your husband, as you awaited the birth of your child. The book, titled Love or Hate, was published, and I gained instant success as a writer. People loved my story, although they had no idea that it was true. One day, I received a guest, in the form of one of your best friends. This friend told me to get over you, that you were happy with your husband. I didn't argue with this friend, but instead, I agreed. I told this friend that I promised never to think of you every again. Of course, that was a lie, but what would he know? The day your son was born, I received an owl from Molly. She told me of his birth, and the letter was destroyed. I did not want to hear of you anymore.

I retired from my job, and left the wizardry world forever. Now, I am well over 100 years old. I have no family, but I did once. I lived alone, though. One day, I received the last owl I would ever receive, and the first in over 75 years. The letter was simple, informing me of a very sad thing. Mi amor, you had died. I thought that I would never go back to the wizardry world, but here I was. I went back for the funeral. It was at the same place as your parents. Here I was, over 150 years old; at a funeral for the first and only person I ever loved. I dressed nicely, in a muggle suit, and appeared at the church, taking a seat in the back. As I sat, everyone turned to look at me. I said nothing, but watched as people spoke about you.

Finally, after hearing many talks, your casket was opened. Here I was, haven't seen you in many years, as I walked up to the casket. You looked so much different from what I remembered. Your skin was pale, not tan like it once was, and your hair was completely gray. I held your hand, gently kissed it, and I walked back to my seat.

I was stopped by a little girl, around the age of 4 or so. She had your eyes, and dark curly hair. She smiled at me, and I found myself returning the smile. She wore a light blue dress, and she sat on the pew in front. She patted the seat next to her, and her eyes demanded for me to sit down. I did so, as the girl took my hand. She smiled warmly; she looked so much like you, although she had to be your great-granddaughter, maybe even two greats. Her mother looked over at myself, and smiled as well.

I was asked by the girl's mother if I knew you, and in return, I said I did. I leaned back against the pew. Tears filled in my eyes, as your body was turned into ashes, and the family received lockets in which they put some of your ashes. I thanked the woman who handed me the locket, and I opened it. It was a picture of you from your earlier days, with you smiling from ear to ear. I recognized the picture as one I took of you myself, all those years ago. I put some of your ashes into the locket and sealed it tightly, as we prayed.

The girl's mother invited me to a celebration lunch, and I reluctantly agreed. We went to a restaurant that you owned, and I sat with your family. As we ate, I was asked how I knew you. My answer was simple, mi amor, I had once taught you. Once lunch ended, the girl held my hand, as we left the restaurant. The girl's mother turned to me, and smiled. She commented on how she never asked me my name. I just smiled as I told her my name, and she gasped.

It has been awhile since I've seen you, my love. I loved you, and I always will. I will never forget you, mi amor. For my name is Lucius Malfoy, and for once, I did not get what I wanted: you.