I wish I'd been I wish I'd been
A Teen, Teen Idle
Wish I'd been a prom queen
Fightin' for the title
Instead of bein' 16
I'm burning up a Bible
Feeling
Super
Super
Super
Suicidal.
I stared at my reflection in the mirror, everything had changed in the past year. My skin was more tanned than it had ever been, even when I lived on the islands. My green eyes seemed to glow like the embers left behind from a fire that was stamped out. The lack of a definitive pupil made me look blind, but I can only wish I had been born blind. My once purely brown hair was tipped in a dusty coral color, and was pulled up into a high ponytail. I smoothed on some clear chapstick on my dry lips. I was like a robot, nothing was left in my hollow core. I was going to be stuck here forever, I could never go home. I could never find the man I loved.
"No use feeling sorry for yourself, darling." A voice piped up behind me. I whipped around to be met with a pale face, with glowing green eyes and charcoal colored black and red hair. She was a beautiful, older woman with a serene grace surrounding her. But I knew better. My weapons appeared in my hands, two war axes in the shape of a white bat wing and black angel wing. Black Dawn and White Night, I had dubbed them.
"What are you doing here!?" I snarled. She stood up from her place on my bed, the hem of her beautifully crafted dress shuffling around her feet, which were in confining black heels.
"I just wanted to say hello to my favorite little girl." She smiled, and disappeared in a corridor of darkness. I stamped my foot, my weapons disappearing in a flurry of scales and feathers. I wish that woman would just leave me alone, but nothing I wish for ever comes true, does it?
I pulled on a red tank top, strapping on a loose bustier over it. I pulled on some tight, black leather pants that bagged around my ankles and rattled when I moved. They were covered in straps and had some chains dangling from my white belt and pockets. I pulled on some grey and black sneakers with zippers along the back, and a black leather strap on the front. I pulled on a pair of white arm warmers that went above my elbow and stopped at my wrist. I wonder how long I'll be here, if the worlds really were disconnected. As I sat on my bed, I began reflecting on how I even came to be here, a year ago. I thought about how it all began.
"Hey Reo, ya wanna go to the island with us today? It's the last day of school, and you never get out anymore." Sora grinned at me as the four of us walked away from the school building.
"I dunno Sora, my parents want me to get started on summer reading real soon..." Ever since I had been a young girl, my adoptive parents have been making me focus on my academics. I used to be a lot closer to Riku, Sora, and Kairi, and I missed spending every day with them.
"Oh c'mon, I'm sure they'll let you come for a little while. How about this, we'll go on ahead and if you're not there thirty minutes after, we'll guess that you couldn't come and just do our thing, okay?" Kairi poked my cheek, her short red hair flapping in the breeze that graced us with its presence. My own light brown hair was a bit longer, and I had two pieces that were longer on the side of my bangs. Kairi was so much prettier than me, that's why everyone liked her better. She also had better social skills.
"Oh...okay." I reluctantly agreed, even though I did really want to go. I took my leave of them, scampering into my house and using my key to unlock the door. Everything was quiet...too quiet.
"Reo, we had to go away on business for a day or two. There are some TV dinners in the fridge, and if you haven't finished at least half of your summer reading by the time we get back you'll be grounded for a month. Don't have anyone come over and take care of yourself. From, Mom and Dad." I read the note I found on the kitchen island, a bitter taste in my mouth. I loved my foster parents, I really did. They gave me everything I needed, food, shelter, clothes, support. Everything I needed except love. I smiled when I thought of when Riku found me on the beach all those years ago, saying that he saw something sticking up from the shore and when he touched it, I appeared in a flash of light. Nobody believed him though, except me. I can't remember anything from before that, but I had made a nice life on the islands.
I crumpled the note in my fist and tossed it in the garbage, throwing my school bag on the ground with a loud thud. I marched upstairs to my bedroom, already pulling my collared shirt off. I tossed that and the rest of my uniform onto my bed before slipping on a white kimono dress. It stopped at my mid thigh and the edges were black. I pulled on a black tube top over it that covered up from the top of my barely noticeable cleavage all the way down to my hips. It had three red triangles on the bust line of it, and I tied a white sash around my waist over it. I tied a thin red ribbon over that, and slipped on my white sneakers. I put on tight black legwarmers with red trimming, and put a yellow and blue flower barrett in my hair. I smiled softly as I remember when Riku gave me the clip on my 9th birthday, bumbling like a shy little boy.
When I reached the little islet, they were already there.
"Hey Reo, you made it!" Sora grinned at me.
"Wow, that's a really pretty barrett, where'd you get it?" Kairi asked me as we all walked on the beach. I blushed slightly and made the slightest hand motion toward Riku.
"Awwww~" Kairi cooed.
"Riku's got a girlfriend~" Sora mocked him and made a silly face.
"I gave it to her when we were nine, okay?" Riku crossed his arms, attempting to seem aloof.
"So uhm, what do you guys wanna do?" I played with the hem of my skirt, wishing my sleeves weren't so long.
"Well actually..." Sora started.
"We wanna build a raft, so we can go to other worlds." Kairi finished for him. I questioned the idea that a little raft would be able to take them to a whole other world, but didn't voice my concerns. "Hey Riku, maybe Reo could come with us! Maybe she's from another world, like me." Kairi giggled and took my hand, and I was reminded of how close we were as children, bonding over our mutual amnesia.
"Well, I did find her as a crystal statue poking out of the water." Riku said aloud.
"Oh c'mon Riku, not that again." Sora laughed. Riku simply shook his head.
"Okay, all four of us will help build the raft, gather food and water, that kind of stuff. And in about a week, we all set sail!" Sora grinned. I was hesitant, but I nodded. And so we spent the rest of the day planning out what we would use to build the raft, what food we would gather, and who would do what.
I returned to an empty home that day, no, an empty house. No matter how hard I tried, I could never feel at home in this place. I wasn't sure how I knew what it was like to be in a real home, but I knew it wasn't here. I heated up a TV dinner in the microwave, scarfing it down quickly before taking a shower and slipping into my pajamas. I sat on my bed, a book in my hand, struggling to read the words printed in front of me. My eyelids grew heavier and heavier until sleep wrapped me in it's embrace.
I woke late the next morning, dressing in the same outfit and going to the same islet to the same friends. These were the things that I wouldn't mind being the same every day of my life. I rowed out to greet my friends, to find Riku berating Kairi and Sora for being lazy.
"So Reo, you're actually going to do something, unlike these bums, right?" Riku asked me with a smirk. I giggled and nodded. I was dubbed with the task of gathering rope and cloth for the day, but spent most of it just exploring. I delivered what I brought to Riku, and that day we all hung out by the paopu tree. Kairi and Sora were sitting on it, while Riku and I leaned on it.
"So, Kairi and Reo's homes are out there somewhere, right?" Sora asked.
"Could be. We'll never know by staying here." Riku responded. I nodded.
"It'd be great if I could remember where I came from." I said, searching my mind for memories that were so far out of reach.
"But how far could a raft take us?" Sora asked.
"Who knows. If we have to, we'll think of something else."
"So, suppose you get to another world," Kairi giggled "What would you do there?"
"Hm. Well, I haven't really thought about it. It's just...I've always wondered why we're here, on this Island. If there are any other worlds out there, why did we end up on this one?" Riku voiced his thoughts, while I stared at the sunset I so rarely got to see.
"And, suppose there are other worlds out there...Then ours is just a little piece of something much greater. So, we could've just as easily ended up somewhere else, right?" Riku looked up at his friends.
"I dunno." Sora laid on his back.
"I guess, I mean, that is if there are other worlds." I put my hands behind my head, letting my face soak up the last remaining rays of sunlight.
"Exactly, so that's why we need to go out there and find out. Just sitting here won't change a thing." Riku stared at the horizon, an intense look in his aquamarine eyes. "It's the same old stuff...So let's go."
"You've been thinking alot lately, haven't you?" Kairi asked. Riku turned to her, a soft smile on his face.
"Thanks to you. If you hadn't come here, and I hadn't found Reo on the beach, I probably would've never thought of any of this." Kairi and I smiled. "Kairi, Reo, thanks."
"Heh, you're welcome." We both said. Soon sunset descended into night and I found myself walking side by side with Kairi on our way to the docks. When I arrived back at my house, I was alone again. This blessing wouldn't last long, and I knew it. They'd be back soon, and all hell would break loose. But for the first time in a long time, I didn't care.
I did not care what my foster parents thought of me, for my entire life they've deprived me of any social interaction and made me focus on school. I was at the top of almost every class, I could play the piano, I took gymnastics, I even knew how to tie a cherry stem with my mouth! Okay, that may be useless knowledge but it's still knowledge, and I'm sick of knowledge. I stared at my reflection in the bathroom mirror before hastily pulling off my clothes and taking a shower. I crawled into bed and layed there for hours, seemingly unable to sleep. I didn't know how long I had been awake, the sun was already up and my parents were knocking on my door. I sluggishly got up and answered it, dark circles around my eyes.
"Hello Reo," My parents didn't even hug me, but they rarely did. "Did you finish your summer reading? You've had enough time." My mother asked me. She was a plump woman with ginger hair and cloudy blue eyes. She wasn't ugly, she was simply plain. My father was a lanky man with salt and pepper hair. I didn't look like either of them, so it was common knowledge that I was adopted, even to people who had never met me.
"...No, I didn't." My parents eyes widened in shock, before my father frowned.
"And why not, young lady?"
"I've been busy. Busy having an actual life. I've been hanging out with Sora, Kairi, and Riku on the island." My mother looked appalled, and my father was very obviously upset with me.
"Well, you're going to stay here and finish your reading, and you will not be hanging out with those kids again!" My father raised his voice at me, and I clutched my pajama pants.
"...No. I'm going to do what I want for once." I gave my father one last defiant stare before slamming and locking the door in their faces. They pounded and shouted at the door, but I just couldn't take it anymore. I wasn't made to be locked up with books and papers like they've been raising me, I was made to be free, like a bird. I hastily dressed jumped out the window, catching a tree branch and safely dropping to the ground. I ran off towards the docks and rowed to the islands. It was only 9:00, and I found myself quite tired by the time I got there.
I layed in the shade by the secret place that Riku showed me when we were kids, but before I fell asleep I crawled into the little cave. I scanned the area for a moment, ignoring the door that never seemed to open, and made my way over to just one of the little drawings in the cave. It was about 9 years old by now, from when Riku and I were 6 years old. It showed him and I holding hands, even though I was not a bad artist, his drawing was better and cleaner than mine because I had never drawn with a stone before. I smiled and took a small rock, drawing a little star in our hands and a crude version of my flower barrett in my hair. I crawled out of the secret place and laid back down, closing my eyes and letting my body relax. Before I entered the sandmans kingdom, I recalled how long my hair was when I arrived at the islands, how innocent I was. I still was innocent, I had been forcefully kept away from the problems of the world. But I didn't want that, I wanted my innocence gone...just so I can miss it.
AN: Hey guys, I found my old PS2 yesterday and went out and bought KH2 from my local gamestop (the nearest copy of KH1 was in effing Picayune, a state over. So I ordered it and it just came in today!) And I really wanted to rewrite my old KH fic that was on Quizilla (it has the same main character name, not much else is the same). I personally hope Reo isn't seeming Mary Sueish so far, and the whole story is going to be in flashback form. I know it's short, but this is just the first chapter! And the lyrics from the beginning are from the song Teen Idle by Marina and the Diamonds (great song, I recommend it). And this song won't take import over my Kuroshitsuji fic, it's just as important to me. Remember to review!