Author: Silent Tears of Agony

Title: The Switch

Rating: PG-13

Genre: Romance, Comedy

Chap: 1

Evil Tabby: (rips down disclaimer) What's with this stupid disclaimer? Don't they know I own Rurouni Kenshin? Muhahaha cough cough I'm dying! wheeze

Prissy Tabby: Well, that's what happens when you lie, you evil little being.

Evil Tabby: cough Why you...! (Jumps up and starts chewing on Prissy Tabby's head.)

Prissy Tabby: Ahhhhh! Got off of me you sorry excuse for an alter-ego. Dangit! Now I'm going to have to get my rabies shots!

STA: Sighs I do not own Rurouni Kenshin. Nobuhiro Watsuki does. I also do not own this plot. It's been done so many times I think it should be shot to put it out of its misery. (A large cloud of dust covers her as the two alter-egos continue fighting.) cringes And I think they should be shot to put me out of mine.

Yes, yes. I am actually writing a comedy (gasp) I think my cuz just about keeled over when I told her. It's a good thing she was already sitting down.

I'd like to thank Brittanie Love for agreeing to be my beta-reader. (Poor girl doesn't know what she's gotten herself into. ) I hope she has as much fun editing this as I had writing it! (I'm just...sure...she will.) O.o)

Battousai's thoughts are in bold

Kenshin's thoughts are in italics

'..' normal people's thoughts

-

Kenshin couldn't stand it any longer. Normally the small man wasn't a confrontational person, but this couldn't be ignored. He had to let her know how he felt about her. He walked up to the door, took a deep calming breath, and opened it. "Megumi-dono?"

Megumi popped out from nowhere. "Oh, Ken-san! Is there anything I can do for you? Like maybe performing a physical examination? Ohohoho." She realized now what she had felt for him was just an infatuation. The one she really had strong feeling for was that baka . . . no! She wouldn't let herself think of him. It couldn't be possible that she would feel anything for that annoying jerk. And he certainly never felt anything for her. So - for now - she would have to content herself with making poor Ken-san blush. Which was a pretty fun job. Ah, and there it was. A cherry blush spread across his cheeks.

Kenshin looked around nervously at all the patients. "Ano . . . " he cleared his throat and straightened up with conviction. "Actually there is something I would like to talk to you about, Megumi-dono." The timid man added as an afterthought, "privately."

The doctor's heart sank slightly. He had spoken so forcefully. Perhaps she had gone too far in her teasing and now he returned her so-called feelings? She looked at his grave face and could think of no other reasoning. It seemed her catty tongue had really gotten her into trouble now. Megumi smiled bravely. "Of course Ken-san, I hope the matter is not urgent as I have other patients before you."

"Oh." The thought that she might be busy never occurred to him. All of his confidence was draining again. "I'll come back later," he said in a small voice.

Kenshin was doing some odd jobs today and he didn't want to be late for them. It wasn't much, but it helped pay Kaoru's bills and - he blushed again - he was saving up for some material Kaoru had been eyeing. She would look very pretty in it. However, it was pure silk and hand-embroidered. The item was definitely not something she could afford.

"Very well."

He heard Megumi's voice and nodded. Why did she sound so relieved? He hadn't threatened her in any way. Kenshin shook his head. He didn't have time to think on such things. He had to get to his first job. It was washing some old lady's laundry. The Rurouni wrinkled his nose at the thought. The only laundry he wanted to be washing was Kaoru-dono's. Somehow he felt more . . . intimate with her when he was doing her laundry.

Oro! Sessha didn't just think that did he? No, that must have been the Battousai. Bad Battousai. The only reason we do Kaoru-dono's laundry is to help her out.

Are you sure about that Rurouni? Battousai smirked.

Of course I am. What other reason could there be?

Smirk

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Megumi looked out of the window. It was quite late and Ken-san hadn't come back yet. Maybe he had forgotten? She could only hope.

"Megumi-dono?"

So much for hope.

The doctor cleared her throat. "Yes, Ken-san? Why don't you sit down and make yourself comfortable. What is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

Kenshin sat down. If he hadn't been so nervous he would have noticed that Megumi wasn't flirting with him for once.

The gentle Rurouni twiddled his thumbs and cleared his throat. His mouth opened only to be promptly closed. He cleared his throat again. Somewhere in the background a clock ticked.

"Ken-san if you don't mind, I am very busy today."

Kenshin looked at her curiously. She hadn't looked very busy when he came in. In fact she had been trying to balance a pen on the end of her nose. He figured it would be wise to just let that matter drop, however. "Well you see, Megumi-dono, it's about the way you have been treating me."

Megumi knew it. This was the point where he would declare his undying love for her. She would just have to let the poor man down gently. "Ken-san," she interrupted him, "I know what it is you're trying to say. I know exactly how you feel. But I'm afraid that I don't feel the same way."

"I know that. That is why I came here to talk to you. Please-"

Megumi cut him off. "No Kenshin. I just don't love you the way you want me to. I know it is easy for you to think I do because of the way I have been treating you. Please don't remain sad for too long. Kaoru needs you."

Kenshin's mouth hung open from the shock of what he just heard. His brain overloaded and shut down.

WHAT? What is she talking about? I never said I love her.

What is that woman talking about? She is definitely not my type. I much prefer Kaoru. The Battousai paused in his ranting and Kenshin could almost feel his brain switching gears. Wait a minute she said something about Kaoru needing me. What's wrong with my Kaoru?

She isn't yours that she isn't.

Just ask the stupid question, Rurouni!

All right. All right.

"What's wrong with my Kaoru-dono?"

"YOUR Kaoru-dono?" Megumi smirked.

Kenshin blushed, "Uh . . . uh . . . no no. . . . uh . . . Kaoru-dono's not mine. She is . . . she's . . . her's . . . she's her own . . . she belongs to herself . . . "

Megumi raised an eyebrow, "Uh-huh."

"Um, w-what's wrong with K-kaoru-dono?" asked a scarlet Kenshin.

"Oh . . . nothing other than the fact that she is in love with you and you're too dense to realize it."The dark-haired woman pretended to inspect her fingernails as if she hadn't just delivered life-altering news.

Kenshin's eyes bugged out. "Y-you really mean that? Kaoru-dono is in love with . . . with sessha?" he asked hesitantly.

Megumi rolled her eyes. "Really Ken-san, I don't know which one of you is worse, you or the tanuki. Yes, she's in love with you. And you love her. I know it. Sano knows it. Even Yahiko knows. Kami-sama, everybody seems to know but the two of you!"

Kenshin cringed slightly. "Is it really that bad?"

Megumi nodded her head rapidly.

Kenshin was silent for a few minutes while he digested this information, then hung his head. "It doesn't matter anyway. Kaoru-dono is too good for sessha."

Megumi understood now why Kaoru was always hitting Kenshin. It was the only way to get any sense into that thick skull of his. She would have liked to beat some sense into him if she didn't have a reputation to keep up. For the first time ever Megumi envied the sweaty little tanuki.

"Kenshin, do you really think that's the way Kaoru sees it? She welcomed you, all of us really, into her home without a second thought. She loves you, Kenshin. We all do." Kenshin remained unconvinced, so she tried again.

"Kenshin, I took countless lives as well. I didn't have to look them in the eye like you did, but still it was by my hand that they died. Yet, you once told me that I could gain repentance by helping others just as you do. Now you say you are still not good enough. Does that mean that I am unworthy as well?"

Kenshin's expression was horrified. "No Megumi-dono! I would never think such a thing of you."

Megumi smiled and inclined her head toward him. "Then what makes you any different?" She asked softly. Kenshin thought for a second.

"I guess I never thought of it that way." Uncomfortable with all the attention focused on him, he tried turning the tables. "So, how are things going with Sano?" Megumi stiffened then sniffed.

"I have no idea what you're talking about Ken-san."

Suuure, she doesn't.

Maa, be nice.

Why? After the heart-attack she just put us through . . .

Kenshin just sighed and decided to ignore Battousai as he went on and on and on.

"Megumi-dono, he loves you. I can tell by the way he looks at you. So does Kaoru-dono. In fact Yahiko has even commented on it." Yahiko had made the unfortunate mistake of making the comment in front of Sano. Yahiko had been lucky to escape that one alive. Kenshin smiled devilishly. "In fact, everyone seems to know but the two of you," he used her same words back on her.

Megumi blushed. "Mou Ken-san. When did you become a tease?"

Kenshin chuckled. "I'm just full of surprises."

"Ken-san," the doctor smiled coyly, "are you trying to flirt with me?"

Kenshin waved his hands in a defensive gesture. "No! NO! Of course not."

I do NOT want to go through that again.

For once I agree with you.

Megumi laughed her usual laugh. "I'm just teasing you Ken-san."

Woman, if you do that to me one more time I'll -

Kenshin slapped a hand over Battousai's mouth and chuckled nervously when Megumi started giving him strange looks.

She probably thinks I'm crazy. She doesn't know how right she is.

"Megumi-dono, if you do not mind, I need to get home or Kaoru-dono will start to worry about me."

"Oh, of course Ken-san." She hesitated for a minute before speaking again. "You won't say anything to Sano, will you Ken-san?"

"Megumi-dono, he deserves to know."

"Oh, in that case I'll just tell Kaoru--"

He cut her off hastily. "No, no. No need for that."

"But she deserves to know too."

Kenshin shoulders slumped. "I know. We're such cowards aren't we?"

Megumi nodded and straightened her shoulders. "All right. I'll tell Sano within the week." She wagged a finger in front of Kenshin's nose. "But you have to tell Kaoru too."

"Al-alright."

"Trust me Ken-san. It's for the best."

"Yes. Yes,"the redhead agreed hurriedly so he could leave. "Bye, Megumi-dono. I'll see you tomorrow."

-.-.-.-.-.-.-.-

Sano couldn't believe his ears. "You won't say anything to Sano, will you Ken-san?" Megumi's words repeated through his head.

Just what the heck was that supposed to mean? And what was that about not telling Jou-chan? Was Kaoru not enough for Kenshin? Did he feel the need to play with Megumi's heart too? 'Che, Kenshin. Why are you doing this?'

Kenshin knew how Sano felt about the Kitsune. She was his. She just didn't know it yet.

The Rurouni stepped out and started when he saw Sano on the other side of the shoji. Had he heard their conversation? Hoping that he hadn't, Kenshin plastered his patented Rurouni grin on. "Good evening, Sano. Sessha was just going to the dojo to prepare dinner. Would you like to join us?"

Battousai raised an eyebrow. You have to ask?

Kenshin sweatdropped. I suppose it was a stupid question.

Neither Kenshin nor the Battousai was prepared for what happened next.

Sano's fist landed squarely on Kenshin's jaw, causing him to crash into the wall. "You stay away from Megumi!" That said, Sano stalked off into the street.

"Orororo . . . "

Did I miss something?

Why does everybody think I'm interested in that cursed FOX WOMAN!

-

So, how did I do? This is the first time I have ever tried my hand at comedy, so I would really like to know what you think of it. All criticism (and praise) is welcome. :D