Chapter Rating: T

Genre: Angst, Romance, Drama

.:.Enjoy!.:.

Walking across the scorching sand, Sabaku no Gaara was on his lonely march to Konoha, needing to get away from his Kazekage duties, amongst other things. He quickened his pace, so he could get far away from Suna, and make it to Konoha by nightfall. He succeeded in his plan, reaching the village as the moon began to lift itself into the sky. He nodded to the ANBU guards, after proving he was him, and walked along the quiet night streets of Konoha. He wasn't in the mood to eat or drink, so he jumped onto a building and stared at the stars, thinking back to why he left on his secret vacation.

Flashback

"Gaara! Have you finished those papers yet?!" Temari shouted, pacing around her youngest brother's office.

"Gaara. Did you sign the papers the Hidden Mist village wanted? Their Jounins are getting impatient down here!" Kankurou asked, then shouting at said Jounins about not touching his puppets.

"Damn it Gaara! Hurry up, I've got to deliver these NOW!" Temari screamed, going to her brother's desk to see what he was doing. She saw him quickly shut a book, so she reached for it, successfully grabbing it from his pale hands.

"Give that back, Temari!" He voiced, upset that she found and stole that of all things.

"Interesting, little brother, is this a diary?" She teased, completely forgetting about the papers. She read page after page, after running out of the room and locking herself in hers.

"Damn girl." Gaara mumbled, very depressed already, now even more so that Temari will know why.

"I have to leave, this place is...a headache." He said out loud, jumping out a window and leaving the city.

End Flashback

As he viewed the stars, he remembered the journal, he refused to call it a diary, he had written in, and what it said.

Journal Entry

'I feel...indifferent. I...confessed. To Lee. His reaction...frightened me. His look. His face distorted into a look of sheer horror. He bent his head, and shook it sideways, indicating my already known answer. I ran. I showed true weakness. I fled from my fears. I don't hate him. I couldn't. He...just isn't like me. Once away from him, I grabbed a kunai and impaled my arm with it. I tried anyways. Damn sand. It won't even let me bang my head against the desk I'm sitting in front of. Damn sand. How come it can't protect me from this kind of pain! Temari and Kankurou's yelling isn't helping. My guess is they don't understand how I feel about Lee. Nobody understands me. Those two don't know this kind of hell. They nev-.

Journal closed because Temari took it.

He felt like if he was female, he would just openly burst into tears. Even though he tried his hardest to mask his pain, two silent tears fell down his face, and so it began. As he cried to himself, he failed to hear the footsteps of someone climbing onto the roof from that persons' window. He had stopped crying, and hadn't noticed the person until they sat next to him. He saw pink hair and realized who it was.

"Are you okay, Kazakage-sama?" She asked quietly, concerned for her ally.

"I'm fine." He mumbled, not really in the mood to talk.

"You don't sound fine, Gaara-kun." She said, trying to see if he'd let her call him his name.

"Sakura, why are you here?" He asked, getting annoyed.

"I came to think about my break up." She said calmly, not sounding the least bit sad.

"With who?" Gaara asked, now kind of interested.

"Naruto." She said.

"I never knew you were together." Gaara stated, feeling out of the loop.

"We were together for a year. He left me for Hinata this morning."

"Oh."

"It's sad, I really loved Naruto, but I guess for some people, love changes, you know?" She asked smiling.

"No. I don't." He stated, her smile fading.

"Oh. You've never been in love?" She asked meekly.

"I'm not interested in telling you anything." He hissed.

"Was it Lee?" Sakura asked with growing curiosity.

"How the hell did you find out!" He screamed, not loud enough to wake anyone though, turning to face her for the first time in this conversation.

"I guessed, Kazekage-sama, really!" Sakura said shocked, too afraid to call him by name.

'He cares for him a lot, I can tell by how upset he was, but something must've happened.'

"Is that why you're up here? To think while he's still in Suna?" Sakura mused.

"Yes. It is. I don't know why. I feel indifferent." He said quietly.

"Like how?" She asked, interested.

"I should be glad in a way, because I never even thought I wasn't straight(1), until I met Lee. It's a disadvantage, because I...I think. Possibly..." He started, not able to finish.

"Might love him?" Sakura finished for him.

Gaara just nodded once, and looked out to the stars. He grabbed a shuriken, and attempted to slice his wrist. Again, the sand prevented him from doing so.

"Damn sand." He mumbled. He didn't notice Sakura stand up and walk a few steps behind him, but he did feel her wrap her arms around his neck from behind. He'd gotten so comfortable talking to her, the sand didn't try and stop her getting this close to him. Although, in a way, he was relieved. She was warm, and the night air was getting chilly. Her chest against his back felt...right.

"Sakura?" He asked, determined not to sound afraid so his 'damn sand' wouldn't interfere.

"I think you needed this more than I did, Gaara-kun. You've been through a lot today, right? I'm a medic nin, but I can't heal emotional wounds, wounds of the heart." She said, justifying her actions.

Those last four words reminded Gaara of his uncle, and as the thought came up, he quickly ran, not wanting Sakura to see his tears. He jumped from rooftop to rooftop, until he stopped to catch a breath and heard some strange noises from the building below him. It sounded like wood banging against wood, and voices screaming. He looked into the window, only to stare for a moment and come back up with a blush on his face. He took a minute to get composed, and continued running off into the still night. When he got his journal back, he had to write that down.

He stopped running when he ran out of roof. He looked below him to only see trees. He jumped down into the park, and sat perched in a tree the rest of the evening, thinking of a way to temporarily disarm the sand since it won't let him bleed out his pain.

'That Nara guy is pretty smart. Maybe he can figure it out. He wouldn't care why either. I'll do that after the sun comes up.' He thought to himself.

.:.:.:Author's Note:.:.:.

(1: He can't bring himself to say gay either.)

I don't think I've very good at angst fics, but I'm trying! Hope you all will enjoy this one. It's dedicated to my friend Shiruba, because he likes my straight fictions better. I like my yaoi more, but w/e. :)