Spoot: This was from many years ago.
Duo: Rabbit Hole Era!
Spoot: you got it!
E-Love
The computer beeped, and the screen brightened, indicateing that I had a message. He wrote me...I wandered what he was on. the way he was spelling and writing...and the content of the E-mail:
/"I DON"T KNOW what to say! SHARON! I've gone without sleep since manday night. My mom hasn't found out yet. She is boun to notice soom.. I've been running on auto-pilot for like a day or...two...ZzzzzzzzzZzzzzzzzzZzzzzzzzz yes that is exacaly what I feel like doin right naw...BIG YAWN...I mean BIG HUG!
Hey esay you want to starto some el crapo wit me? Well let's el rumbelo vato Ill kick yo0ur puny little ZzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzZzzzzzzzz zzzzzzz.
where am I?
what is this place?
Oh no gatta go camel toe said I didn't have to go so you can't make me. NOPE. I AM NOT LISTENNING. IKNOW I CANT SPELL DAMMNIT...
AAaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhhhhhh
OK I'm gonna finish the last 18 pages of my book now . I love you babeeee"/
it scared me. I wrote back saying he needed sleep and that he did not even live with his mom. He respnded with this and only this:
/"yeah...but you love me..."/
Duo worried me like this all the time. I'll never get used to it. but just when I think he is going to drive me nuts...this happens:
/"Wat r u doin this weekend ser? I dono what im doin but i sur woud lik to see u
cents it has ben awile. i have something wierd to tell you...but i'l save it for the phone I'll call you later..
love you babe"/
it just makes him tolerable. he always tells me he loves me...I have no clue why, if I had a penny for every time...or no...lets make that a quarter, I would be so fucking rich ..sorry...didn't mean to let my language get out of hand...I do that some times... this one is one of my faves...simply titled "YES!"
/"I'M SO HAPPY!AAAAAHHHHHHH -drool face- I LOVE YOU"/
I love you too...I wish I could tell him that...I wrote one to him...once or twice...this was the second one...after he left me...
/"OMG!
you're coming home in one month! to me! in my arms! I can't wait!
you know what! I love you! I do! I know I sent you a letter before! but I had to do it again because you're coming home soon! I missed you so much! I am gunna call you! on Aug. 20th! at 8:00 ok! cool! so you can get my number! I don't know it off-hand!
I HATE YOUR MOTHER! there I feel better! lol I miss you! I miss waking up and you saying good morning to me! I miss us writing stories together. I miss your smile! you goofy ass beautiful man you! I miss the way you would make me feel! you made me feel good about myself! you did that! and now when I start to feel like shit! I think of you! you son of a bitch! lol I do love you! and I am so shitty for not knowing it then!"/
I am shitty...really...I tell him I love him...he hasn't gotten back to me. Its november 16th...and nothing...he was supposed be back August 20th but nothing...either he forgot about me...or somethings wrong...God I hope nothing is wrong! ah...found my response to one of the E-mail, sorry for the subject change:
/"what the Duce? just moments ago...you were on the verge of man Slaughter(killing mommy dearest) now you are happy! what are you so happy about?
last night...no one was around to talk to...wow...I felt lonley...eh, but I had a dream that Meredith Brooks(I'm a bitch I'm a lover...yeah you get the picture)came to my house to pick me up to take me to her concert. she was driving drunk and had the weirdest cigarets. anyway, we get there and there was a pumpkin head spider...all kinds of stuff.
then a second time, I guess I was living in this...world...with Samantha Davis(You know.)and her dad died, all that goodness. anyway...there was this cult that showed up and everyone started panacking, but me...then the threat left, and I was the wiser. so I ended up doing this Foamy rant on how stoooopid everyone was. then I knocked on Sam's door. she opened it. now in my dream, the two of us were not friends...anyway, so I say..."Whats up?" and she hugs me and cries ..later she sends me a Thank You thingy...any shway...WEEEEESNAW! gatta go...love ya too."/
wow, I did let him know I loved him too...I thought that was why he stopped writing me...but I guess it's really a case of "he hasn't gotten back" where the FUCK is he! I worry allot, when he wont write for long amounts of time. I know he's busy, he is a solderer after all. But that's what gets me bothered. The long waiting, is he still alive, did he get my last message, does he even care? But then, there's this. this little thing I got a few weeks ago...
/"Baby I love you with all of my heart."/
this was all it was...he really knows how to pull me up and drag me down...then drag me up! eh?
this was one I sent him about one of his friends...it was the boys b-day, and Duo was telling me about all the stuff he got:
/"$8 is good...so Nick got some skills? and a Batman...he is liven large! ' oh I am just fine and dandy like sour candy, Melissa kidnapped me last night and we went to Taco Smell. I had a burrito. my weekend was coll I mean "Cool" anyway. Andy came over, we jammed out to Green Day. and also...
MAKING THE VIDEO ON MTV2 Green Day: Making the Video will première on MTV2 November 15 at 9 PM. Check your local listings.
how rad!
I wonder what the video is going to be? eeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeh I can't waite!...(or however it's spelled!) (Shut up!) yeah...so speakers hu? and a raidar! yay! and all your shit back! big hug
sorry I was not therr...Gosh I am never there!
yeah I do need to write...but what...I think I have one in mind...Holden gets a bad hair cut...sad...yeah...ok well now I need to poo poo, and change the tampon..Aunt Flow Is here...6:00 am this morning! gurrrrrrrr...bye bye love!"/
I guess you could say I miss him. I laugh. well DUHHHH! heh.
here is one that really made me love him:
/ "Last night babe as I lay sleeping,I dreamed I held you in my arms,but when I woke up I was mistaken,So i hung my head and I cried.I stayed up all last night after that reminiscing on aalllll the times my true love for you has kept my spirit going. my love for you is so great I cannot even describe it...I'm about to cry dammit...I'm tearing...
I'v gotta go and clean myself up now. I love you with my heart and soul baby
I love you so much Hilda."/
I wanted him to know that he could show any emotion he wanted with me. I loved them. I loved how he could be who he was with me...I let him know that if he ever stopped...I would kick his ass! heh.
this was one of our more funny moments, in a message called "I love you so much" he wrote:
/"sweetie...why do you scream every time you think of me? I've gotta go now but ...i loveyou..."/
and I wrote back stating this long...nothing to do with nothing:
/ "Oh my god. lol. I just thought that this was the funniest! Oh baby, you know why I screem! lol J/K Oi, I hope you had a good day and what not. I got a new Tamagatchi. I named it Jimmy. after St. Jimmy. you know. anyway. wow. thank you sooooo much for that e-card it was so sweet. so I have a question, are we going to see the movie this weekend? If so, can Quatre come? he wants to see it too. but oi, I am having a prob...Sam wants me to come stay the weekend! she called and asked if I was coming Friday. I tolld her I didn't know about that. but she wants me to because her grandmother put her up to it. like she don't have a mind of her own! I asked if she wanted to come down here, and on sunday when we take her home, I would stay to T or T. when I tolld Quatre that I was going T or T, he got all sad...and began to guilt trip me. he wanted to spend Halloween with me...guuuurrrrrrrrr! what the fuck am I going to doooooooooooooooooo!
anyway. Jimmy just pooped, I had better go. lov ya lots and lots!"/
hehehe...thats what I loved about Duo, we could be who we were around each other no matter the time and circumstance. I could let him know I just started my period. or that I was having a bad hair day, not that I give a shit about my hair...
I missed him. It sickens me to my core, how much I miss him. But it is what it is, as they say. I may never see him again, or maybe one day out of the blue, he may just show back up. For what ever reason. I'll be there, waiting, like some lonesome school girl!
Spoot: Wow...Long time...
Duo: don't get lost in the Hole again!