Penname: SierraVierra
Original or Derivative (Fanfiction): Derivative
Ratings/Warnings/Notes: M
Disclaimer: All copyrights, trademarked items, or recognizable characters, plots, etc. mentioned herein belong to their respective owners. No copying or reproduction of this work is permitted without their express written authorization.
Prompt: Multimedia Share: Conversation
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I feel a sense of peace as I reach the old railroad tracks. I have been coming to this spot since I was a little girl. It makes me feel safe. No one knows about it but me. Well, there is one person, but I know he would never tell a soul about our safe haven.
As I sit, I wait for him to arrive. After years of waiting I know he will arrive promptly at noon. He has never been late once. Since we were thirteen we have spent every single Saturday together. Now, we were both eighteen and seniors in high school. It was the middle of September and the leaves were slowly starting to change color. I usually love watching everything change from summer to autumn. Not this year. This year all it brings is sadness. After this year he will leave to go to whatever Ivy League college he chooses. He will go to classes and parties. He will meet new people. He will find a girl that he will fall madly in love with and spend the rest of his life with her. He will forget about me.
I desperately want all of that for him. He deserves to be happy. I just wish I could be enough for him. It could never happen because we are from two different worlds.
The railroad is proof of that. It separates us. On my side are working class people. People who are struggling to stay afloat. On his side are people who don't have to work at all. People who have so much money they don't know what to do with themselves. On my side are broken homes and broken people. On his side families always stay together. On my side there is a shitty public school with barely enough funding for books. On his side there is a prestigious private school where every single student has their own personal computer. On my side there is me and on his side there is him. But, the railroad is the middle. When we are here there are no sides. There are no gaps between us. We just are.
I think back to the first day I met him. I had come to the railroad to get away from my father. I had noticed all of the empty beer bottles. Luckily, he hadn't noticed me and I was able to sneak out. I had run all the way here.
I sat on the rail and thought about what it would be like to live on the other side. I wanted it so bad. I didn't want to have to go back home and deal with a drunk and abusive father who blamed me for my mother leaving him. I didn't even realize I had started to cry until I heard a smooth voice ask,
"Hey, are you alright?"
I was so shocked that I jumped to my feet and ended up tripping on the rail making myself topple over in the process. When I opened my eyes I was staring at the most beautiful boy I had ever seen. He was leaning over me looking for any injuries I may have had. I didn't want him to see any fading bruises so I managed to growl out,
"Who the hell are you? And get away from me!"
His eyebrows shot up and he raised his hands up in surrender as he backed up.
"I was just trying to help you know."
"It's your damn fault I fell in the first place. You shouldn't sneak up on people like that, geez!"
He blushed as he looked down at his feet.
"I'm sorry. I just saw you crying and had to make sure you were okay."
"I'll be fine." I said shortly. I didn't like this boy. This was my spot. It had been for years. I didn't like the fact that he was here. I also didn't recognize him which means he went to the private school. I didn't like anyone from the private school. They were all snobby assholes.
I sat back down on the rail. I was hoping he would just walk away if I ignored him. No such luck.
"Do you mind if I join you?"
"Very much so," I deadpanned.
He huffed at that, but sat down directly across from me. I could feel the heat of his gaze. I came here to get away from everything and he was ruining it. I decided if I was a bitch he would most likely leave.
"Why don't you go back to your gigantic fucking mansion? I'm sure there are enough rooms to entertain you for fucking days." I growled out.
He furrowed his brows at my statement. He looked so sad that I almost felt bad for him. Then I remembered that this was my spot. The only thing I considered my own and the anger returned.
"I just…I…I don't want to be alone, if I go back to my home that's what will happen."
"Well, don't you have any friends?"
He shrugged his shoulders as he replied, "Not any real ones."
My heart broke for the boy. I knew what it was like to be truly alone and I hated it. This was my safe haven. The place I came to when everything was too hard to deal with. What kind of person would I be if I refused that kind of comfort to someone else?
"Fine, you can stay. But, I come here to think, so don't expect me to talk to you or anything."
He just grinned and nodded his head.
The next Saturday found me in the same spot. I didn't expect him to come back. I had given up on relying on anybody but myself a long time ago. At 12 o'clock on the dot he came waltzing out of the trees grinning at me. After that, it was an unspoken agreement that each Saturday we would both be at the railroad.
It took him a couple of weeks, but he finally convinced me to talk to him. We quickly became friends. He told me about all of the pressure his parents put on him to be the perfect student, athlete, and son. I told him about how my father blamed me for my mother leaving. We bonded over our fucked up parents. We didn't have any secrets between us. Although, I did try to hide any bruises I had. He always worried about me.
As we grew older I could tell I was falling in love with him. Sometimes when one of us needed comfort we would cross the line between best friends and a couple. It never went beyond kissing. Kissing him was like nothing I had ever experienced before. We never discussed our status. We didn't need to.
I am brought back to the present by his approach.
"Hey, what are you doing?" He asks as he sits on his side of the track.
I smile at him while saying, "Just thinking."
"Don't hurt yourself, babe."
I scowl at him while saying, "Oh, shut up. I was thinking about the first day we met. I never asked you why you came back the next week. So why did you?"
"The great conversation." He deadpans. I roll my eyes.
"Be serious. I want to know why you came back."
"I don't know, B. I just knew that I had to see you again. You looked so broken that day. I needed to make sure you were okay. Besides it was a goal of mine to get you to like me."
"Well, keep working on that last part buddy," I say as I fidget with my plastic pearl necklace. I always try to wear my nicest clothes on Saturday. I'm not trying to impress him or anything. I just know he would worry more if he saw what kind of condition most of my clothes were in. That's why I am wearing a stupid skirt and ballet flats that are fucking uncomfortable.
He comes to kneel in front of me.
"Oh come on, B. You know you love me." He whispers into my ear while kissing my cheek.
"Whatever," I grumble. He just grins and is about to kiss my lips when his eyes narrow and he grabs my chin roughly.
"What the hell is this, Bella?" I squeeze my eyes shut knowing that he is referring to my fading black eye. I tried to cover it up with makeup, but it was a bad one and I couldn't hide it perfectly.
"It's nothing, don't worry about it." He huffs and sits back down across from me.
"Bella, a black eye is not nothing," He all but shouts at me. This pisses me off. I am sick of this argument.
"What do you want me to say, huh?"
"I want you to stop acting like it's not a big deal when your dad hits you! I want you to stop making excuses for all of the assholes in your life. I want you to stop being so goddamn stubborn and let me take care of you!"
His statement quickly dissipates any anger I had and turns it into sadness. I wish I could stop acting like it didn't matter that my father hits me, but it's a regular occurrence and a black eye is not the worst he could do. I want to let him take care of me, but he deserves better. He is going to get out of this shithole town and make something of himself. I would just hold him back.
"How do you plan on doing that? What, are you going to keep me in your big house?"
I look up at his face and say, "I don't belong in your world, Edward."
He looks so heartbroken. He stands up and grabs my hand forcing me to stand as well. He takes my face in his hands and kisses my forehead.
"You belong with me, Bella. You are my world." My eyes fill up with tears. God, I want to be his so badly. I want to be enough for him. I know that I never will. I need to get away from him.
"Please, please, Edward. Let me go. Please." He just strengthens his grip and shakes his head.
"I need to go. You have to let me go. Please." I am all out sobbing now. He won't let me go. I start to push against his chest.
"Bella, don't fucking do this. Don't push me away. Let me in." I stop struggling. I know he will never let me go if he thinks I will run away.
He smiles at me thinking he has won. He kisses me with so much love it almost brings me to my knees. I wrap my arms around him and hug him so fucking tight. I know I will not be coming back here again. He is so into the kiss that he doesn't feel me pull away until it's too late. I turn and run back towards my side. I know he won't follow me. We never cross the other's side. I don't look back.
I take my first Saturday afternoon shift at work since I started when I was fifteen. It fucking hurts knowing he is probably sitting in our spot waiting for me. I have to hold back the tears as I deliver the customers their lunch.
The next day as I am walking home from work I hear a car slow down next to me. I have had a shitty fucking day and am in no mood for this. My whole body hurts. Last night my father was upset because I had left my homework on the kitchen table. It earned me a backhanded slap and a shove into the wall.
I keep looking straight ahead as I reply to the douche in the car, "Keep on driving asshole, nothing to see here."
I wasn't expecting the car to drive ahead of me and block my way. I stare wide eyed as Edward gets out of the car and growls out, "Get in the fucking car, Isabella."
I have only seen him a couple of times outside of our spot. He was always with his parents or his friends. He never ignored me, but he didn't publicly acknowledge me either. That's why I'm so surprised to see him here.
"What the hell are you doing here, Edward?" He looks really pissed.
"Do you have any idea how worried I was when you didn't show up yesterday?" He says while stalking over to me. He grips the top of my arms. I let out a whimper because he has unintentionally touched a sore spot on my body.
His eyes widen and he loosens his grip immediately.
"Fuck. What the hell did he do to you now?"He asks while trying to take my sweatshirt off to look at my arms.
I push at his chest to put some space between us.
"Edward, stop please."
"No! I'm not going to fucking stop. You're hurt. I can't fucking stand it when you're hurt. I need to fix it. Please let me fix it, baby." He looks like he is holding back tears.
"Why? Why do you need to fix me, Edward? Why do you waste your time trying to fix something that's broken beyond fucking repair?"
He comes closer to me and grabs my face.
"How can you ask me that, Bella? I need to fix you because I fucking love you so much it hurts. I need to fix you because when you hurt, I hurt. You are not broken beyond repair, baby. Just let me in. Let me take care of you. Let me love you. Love me back, please."
He starts kissing my tears away.
I am so tired. I'm tired of lying to people. I'm tired of keeping my father's alcoholism a secret. I'm tired of hiding bruises. I'm tired of keeping how truly bad it is at home from Edward. I'm tired of staying away from Edward. I'm just fucking tired.
I calm down my sobs enough to give him a reply.
"I do love you, Edward. Never doubt that."
He looks down at me and whispers, "Then let me take care of you."
I nod as I say, "Okay." He looks surprised I agreed so easily.
"Yeah?" He questions.
"Yeah."
His smile is so fucking huge. I have never seen him happier. He kisses me and I wrap my arms around him, but this time I won't push him away. I will never push him away again. He gently picks me up by my ass cautious of my sore body, and I quickly wrap my legs around him.
He breaks the kiss and says, "Let's get the fuck outta here, baby."
I don't look back as he drives us away.
I just look at him and smile and thank god that he decided to try to comfort a crying girl all those years ago.