I Can Do Better Than That

Disclaimer: As much as I wished I owned KOTOR, I don't. If I did, Carth would never leave my closet.

Inspired by the song I Can Do Better Than That from The Last Five Years. I'll put up a link to my preferred rendition in my profile. Some of the dialogue has been taken from the song I don't own that either....

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Morgana sat on her bed, staring out at one of Telos' famous sunsets, her best friend Carolann had just told her that afternoon that she was pregnant with Mitchel's baby. She let out an frustrated huff. They had made plans that after high-school they would head to Thani to get out of their tiny farming town. But, now Carolann was going to stay here with Mitchel to raise their baby. She had shown her the house they were planning on buying. It was a cute little house, white picket fence and matching shudders. They were both barely eighteen and already Carolann was giving up on everything. School, the city, and getting off world. She would get her friend a baby sweater and be off on her own. It was Carolann who was trapped here in this backwater town. Not her. As she pondered her friend's predicament Morgana thought, I can do better than that.

…

Weeks passed and Morgana had given her friend the sweater, her bags where packed and she had her one-way train ticket to Thani. Her mother was crying and her father was lecturing her on staying safe and not talking to strange men. Which translated to no men at all. Period. She thought to herself, Sure dad no boys. Right. Like that would happen. She would finally be on her own, no mother nagging her to sit up straight, no father scaring away all her potential dates.

…

She stepped out of the train station in Thani, and looked around in wonder. Everything was modern, classy, sophisticated. Everything that her home town wasn't. She had made arrangements over the Holonet to rent a small apartment near the heart of the city. There was a line of people waiting for speeder taxis. She joined the ever growing crowd, clutching a map of the city as though if she held it tight enough, the winding streets would embed themselves in her memory. After nearly an hour of being jostled and bumped Morgana was finally getting into a taxi. After telling the Rodian driver the address of her new apartment, she leaned back in the seat and gazed out the window. The college she would be attending started in a couple of weeks and she could hardly wait.

…

School had started last week, and already her schedule was to hectic for even a tour of the city. Morgana was running late for her next class and to make things worse her bag had split open and papers and books where spilling out onto the paved walkway. She dropped to her knees and began frantically picking them up in hopes of not being late. As she was about to reach for her textbook, a hand came out and handed it to her. Looking up she saw a man smiling down at her with chestnut brown hair, whiskey colored eyes, and a bright orange sweater.

"I think these are yours," he spoke softly, his eyes never leaving hers while they gathered the rest of her scattered belongings.

Having successfully gotten her things together she stood to leave, when he caught her arm. She turned toward him with caution in her gaze. He was still smiling at her.

"Do you have a name?" he asked.

She carefully removed her arm from his grasp, and answered, "Morgana. You?"

If it was possible that grin on his face got bigger. "Morgana... Pretty name. I'm Carth."

She smiled tentatively at him, the importance of not being late flying out the metaphorical window.

"Well it's a pleasure to meet ya Carth," she cursed herself internally for not completely getting rid of her accent. Now, he'd think she was a dumb hick just like most people she'd come across. She hated the stereotype, because so many of the people who lived in smaller villages were filled with wisdom of the common man.

He hadn't said anything, so she took it to mean that he thought she was a hick. She turned and began to storm off when Carth called after her, "Hey, Morgana! Where are you off to?"

She called over her shoulder, ice dripping from her tone, "Class, I'm late."

As she got closer to her destination, she could hear his pounding footsteps behind her, to which she sped up her pace. Carth grabbed her shoulder and spun her around to face him.

"Let go of me," she spat out, trying to pull away from the grasp on her shoulder.

"No. Not until you agree to have dinner with me tonight."

She glared at him, weighing her options. On one hand she could say no and risk missing her class all together -he didn't seem like the type to give up easily- or she could say yes get to class with only minimal lateness and go out to dinner with him. With that in mind she gave her answer,

"Yes."

…

She had spent almost a year in the city and things had changed. She had her own apartment, no longer having to share with siblings, she had her own Salky, a small docile kath hound popular among the wealthy. It had followed her home one day, and she had put up posters but no one had claimed the poor thing so she took it in out of kindness. That, and her father would have flipped, Kath Hounds are dangerous don' matter the size. She also had her very first boyfriend. Carth was amazing, handsome, caring, and thoughtful. He was twenty-one and had been in the Telosian Militia for nearly three years, that day he'd been at the college he'd been visiting one of his former professors while on leave.

Ever since that first dinner they'd been inseparable. Morgana was sure that what she felt for Carth was more than casual attraction. She knew that she loved him. When she had accepted that she did indeed love him with everything she had, Morgana had gone to her apartment -though it was practically both hers and Carth's since he was hardly ever at his own place anymore. Maybe she should start to make him buy the groceries, since he was the one who ate most of the food in her home. As she unlocked the door, the apartment was silent. That was odd, Carth was always in by now. She stepped cautiously through the place checking for any danger. No reason not to be careful what with all the rumors about the Mandalorian raiders going around. Morgana entered the one bedroom in her tiny apartment and saw one thing out of place. There was a folded piece of paper on her pillow. She picked it up, unfolded it and began to read.

Morgana,

If you're reading this I've made my decision to leave you. With the threat of the Mandalorian Raiders hanging over us the Militia has called me out on border patrols. And I'm scared that if we stay together and something happens to me I don't want to cause you any pain. And even if we stayed together, I would always be called out when needed, which would be often with my new rank of Lieutenant-Commander. I don't want you to have to wait for me to come home. I want you to stay safe. It's all I ask.

All my love,

Carth Onasi

Morgana was shaking as she reread his letter. Tears poring down her face she crumpled the letter in her hands. He was leaving her? Fine then. So what if he was good-looking, sweet, and good in bed? She'd given up a year of her new found freedom for this man, so what if she loved him? He blew her off with a heart-felt letter and she thought to herself, I can do better than that.

…

It had been nearly a week since Morgana had gotten Carth's letter and even though she'd made a promise to herself that she would find someone to replace him and absolutely would not cry another tear for him, she broke that promise horribly. Only leaving to go to class, she sat in her room holding his pillow to her chest breathing the last traces of his scent. Her resolve to not go and confront him was crumbling.

…

Her resolve was gone. She was inspecting her outfit in the only mirror in the apartment, not wanting to look like she'd put in too much effort in looking nice, but still looking good enough to make him remember that he used to have her all the time. Sure it was petty and selfish, but she loved this man and he'd left her in a misguided attempt to keep her from being hurt. Men. She made her way to the Militia Barracks where Carth had been staying. Asking the guard for entrance, she had been let through after a few checks. Storming through the halls, different soldiers and officers moved out of her way. Reaching the room he shared with two other members she yanked open the door not caring what she came upon. Carth and his bunk-mates were sitting at the small table playing a game of pazaak. The two other men took one look at her livid face and shot out of the room. Carth looked at her with a mixture of love, confusion, and resistance. She took the crumpled note out of her pocket and lobbed it at his head.

"What the frack is this?!" she yelled.

He caught the offending paper in one hand. Realizing it as the note he'd left for her, he gulped.

Putting her hands on her hips she spat, "Well?"

He cleared his throat not quite meeting her eyes. "It's the letter I wrote..."

"I know that you piece of bantha poodoo! Why though? I thought... well what I think clearly doesn't matter according to this! No it's all about what you think is best, and what you think is good for me. Well guess what Carth? I'm a big girl! I know that you'll be getting called out on patrol frequently and I know that something could happen to you! Does that change the way I feel about you? No! I love you Carth and none of your stupid reasons for leaving will stop that!"

Panting and out of breath she looked at him defiantly. He face was filled with amazement at her rant.

"Yes Carth I love you! And I still want to be with you even though you've put me through this. I love you too much to let you leave me."

He stood and walked slowly over to her as if she would disappear.

"You love me?" He'd stopped mere inches in front of her and she could feel the heat radiating from his body.

"Yes." His shocked face gave way to her favorite smile. The silly grin that he'd had on when they'd first met. The one meant only for her.

Her face was tilted up too him and their lips where only a breath apart. He searched her eyes for some indication that she didn't mean it. He found none. His hands came up to rest on her cheeks and he lowered his mouth to hers.

…

After their meeting in the Telos Security Force barracks things went back to normal with Morgana and Carth. That was until her parents had asked to meet that man that had stolen their lil' gal's heart. If she was honest with herself, Morgana was extremely nervous about bringing Carth home to meet her parents. Being the youngest in her family and having three brothers and her father there to 'protect' her from the evil that is the opposite sex, Morgana was certain there would be a full blown interrogation. He held her hand as they got off the train and stepped onto the platform. Giving her one of his signature grins, they walked through the small train station grabbing their luggage as they went.

…

It had been a disaster. Her whole family hated him. Even the cat wouldn't let him near it. After what seemed the one- hundredth insult she grabbed his hand and stormed out, leaving shocked faces in their wake. Morgana had brought him to a place she used go to be alone when her family got a bit too crazy. It was at the edge of a small cliff that overlooked a wide valley. They sat there not talking, until Carth cleared his throat.

"Morgana you don't have to give up your family just for me..." he said quietly.

She turned to look at him and spoke with confidence in her voice, "Carth I want you, no substitution will do. I finally have something worth while, and sure as hell I'm not giving you up just because my family doesn't like you very much."

"Are you sure-?" he began, but was interrupted by a frustrated Morgana.

"Carth, I don't need any lifetime commitments, I don't need to get hitched tonight. Please just don't put up all your defenses, its just you and me. Take a look around, look at how far I've gone. I will never go back to them, because if they can't see how much they hurt me by hurting you, I don't want anything to do with them."

When it felt like he was going to interrupt again she pressed on,

"Carth, it feels like we're meant to be. Like my whole life I've been waiting for you, and now that we're here together nothing has felt more right."

He pulled her closer and wrapped an arm around her shoulders. She snuggled into his embrace and continued, "Just think of the bullshit we've been through Carth. If we can overcome whats happened in the past, I know we can do better than that."

He gave her a smile and planted a soft kiss on her lips.