Why Should They Be Allowed to Go?

By pmochizuki

Author's Note: I've got it up! Here it is, the second story in my original LOTR fanfiction humor/parody series, "Why Did They Do That?" I attempt to explain with 'tongue firmly in cheek' why certain events happened in Peter Jackson's moves. We all know that it would have been quite impossible to introduce every single character from the books into the books. So in my series, I explain why certain characters, (mostly Elves in my stories) were not present in the movies.

Summary: Arwen is bent on having revenge upon her brothers for playing a terrible prank on her. But how to go about it without getting into too much trouble? Or better yet, how to go about it without getting caught? Featuring characters Arwen, Elrohir, Elladan, Elrond, and Erestor.

"Why Should They Be Allowed to Go?"

Erestor watches idly on as Elrond paces back and forth in the balcony. Lord Elrond of Rivendell certainly had reason to be irritated, summons had been sent not yet answered. Erestor savors the silence, but he knows that it is only the calm before the storm.

The Lord of Rivendell, perhaps tired of pacing, stalks into the room and stops before Erestor. "You are sure you sent my summons?"

"Of course. Have I ever failed you?" Erestor answered back with sarcasm.

Thinking for a moment, Elrond slowly replies, "Noooooo..."

"Well then." Erestor picks up a book and resolutely refuses to look into Elrond's eyes.

Elrond goes to his desk and sullenly flops down into his chair as gracefully as possible. Then, proceeding to sulk, the dark haired Elf taps an impatient finger on his desk.

Suddenly, the door opens and an Elf enters in a rush. The Elf turns out to be Arwen who promptly slams the door and leans against the door, breathing heavily as if she had been running. Her strange entrance causes the occupants of the room to just stare at her. Also, as she comes in, she brings along a strange, powerful odor...

Having found his tongue, Elrond gets up from his seat with a curious look on his face. "Arwen! What bring you here in such a manner?"

"Ada!" Arwen gasps. "You need to punish the Dimwit Duo!"

Erestor raises an eyebrow. "'The Dimwit Duo?' "

Shrugging his shoulders indifferently, Elrond explains. "Something Arwen has been calling them for the past thousand years. Before that she used to call them 'the Twisted Twins', or 'the Troublesome Twosome', and some other names I'd be ashamed to mention – "

"ADA!" Arwen screams. "This is no time for that, do you know what they DID?!"

Her last word is said in such a screech that the other two Elves wince. Elrond puts his hands over his ears. "My delicate hearing..."

As Arwen moves past Erestor to go to her father, a whiff of that strange smell reaches the chief counsellor's nose. He wrinkles his nose. Arwen goes face to face with Elrond and jabs a finger at him. "Ella and Elro had the nerve to – !"

"My dear Arwen!" Elrond steps away from her, holding his nose with a disgusted look on his face. "You... you... smell..." Elrond gags.

"YES, that's what I've been trying to tell you!" Arwen yells at the top of her voice. "I REEK of onions and garlic!!"

Finding the situation somewhat hilarious, Erestor tries to keep a straight face as he says, "Well, the obvious question to ask now is why she smells so... sooooo... so – "

Arwen narrows her eyes dangerously in Erestor's direction. "Don't finish it."

"– different," Erestor finishes with a sweet smile.

"It's Ella and Elro! They exchanged my perfume with this, STENCH! And they left this note!" Arwen tries to hand a note she had brought but Elrond keeps stepping away from her. In exasperation, Arwen stands still, her hand holding the note outstretched. Staying as far away as possible, Elrond takes the note then still holding his nose so that his voice comes out in a nasal tone, he reads:

"Roses are red,

They can be pink,

But as for Arwen,

She raises a stink!"

Signed,

Anonymous

"Well," Elrond says thoughtfully. "It does say anonymous."

"It's GOT to be Elladan and Elrohir! Who else would do such a thing? Ever since they came back from that nasty trip with the Dunedain, they've been playing the most awful pranks on me! But this time they will pay!"

Erestor walks over to Elrond, giving Arwen a wide berth. Taking the note, he nods. "I must agree with her, though many may be tempted, your sons are the only ones who would actually carry out such a..." Noticing how Arwen was glaring at him, Erestor finished gently, "...dastardly deed."

At that moment, the door opens again, and two Elves come in. They are obviously the twins as they are remarkably similar, from their long, dark hair to the smirks on their faces. But taking one look at Arwen, and taking exaggerating whiffs of air, they begin congratulating each other.

"Woohoo, it did work Elro! Just as you said!"

"I told you, dear brother! Its slow working; when she first put it on, she has no clue. Gradually it gets worse. Think of what she'll smell like tonight!" Saying that, the two burst out laughing while on the other hand, the three other Elves look on in horror at the thought of Arwen smelling worse than she already was.

"You did try to rinse off the smell, right Arwen?" Elrond asks with worry.

"Of course I did!"

"It's no use, ada," Elrohir says with certainty. "The... um... 'perfume' is made of oils, it just seeps into the skin. Don't worry..."

The twins look at each other then simultaneously say, "It'll wear off... someday!"

Erestor snorts at the thought of Arwen smelling like onions and garlic for a few days while Elrond looks faint. Arwen, with a murderous look in her eyes, once more tries to plead with her father. "Please, you must lock them up in the dungeons – "

"We don't have dungeons."

"Or something!"

"Do not worry, Arwen," Erestor says perkily. "Your father is going to send your brothers away."

Arwen brightens up considerably. "Really?"

Elrond nods then addresses his sons. "I need you two to travel near Tharbad, where I have heard news that Halbarad and his Rangers are scouting the southern borders of the northlands for the next week. In that week, I need you to find them and say that Aragorn is in need of their aid. Together you must ride to Rohan, where you will give Aragorn the message, 'The days are short. If thou art in haste, remember the Paths of the Dead'."

Immediately, Arwen gasps in horror. "You're sending MY beloved to the Paths of the Dead?! How could you?! My beloved, Aragorn, heir of Isildur, Chieftain of the Dunedain – "

Elrohir and Elladan groan. "Arwen, stop!"

"Anyway," Elrond interrupts. "Elrohir and Elladan, I wish you to leave by nightfall. You have less than a month to find the Dunedain and find Aragorn before it is too late."

Seeing how pleased her brothers were looking, Arwen puts her hands on her hips crossly. "It is unfair, they should be punished! Why, you're sending them on a vacation! You know how they love traveling!"

Elrond shrugs. "There's really nothing I can do. Your grandmother told me to send them; I'm under obligation to obey her."

"And you know, sister dear," Elladan says in mock sympathy, "Nobody can cross grandmother."

Knowing there was really no arguing, and also seeing how stubborn Elrond was looking, Arwen storms out of the room. As she passes by her brothers, they begin reciting the poem they had written:

"Roses are red,

They can be pink,

But as for Arwen,

She raises a stink!"

Before exiting, she faces her brothers. "Just remember, I shall get back at you. As much as I may reek because of you IDIOTS, my revenge shall be sweet." With a toss of her head, she exits and the remaining Elves take deep breaths of relief, glad she had left, taking with her the rotten smell.

Elrohir, pretending to be disturbed by Arwen's behavior, says, "I personally thought it was a nice poem!"

"I did, too," Erestor whispers, earning snorts from the twins.

Elrond worriedly speaks to Erestor. "I want you to keep an eye on her – "

"Oh, no," Erestor groans.

"I said keep an 'eye' on her, you don't have to smell her," Elrond rolls his eyes. "I just want to make sure my sons leave tonight without Arwen making true her little temper tantrum."

Dejectedly, Erestor leaves Elrond and his sons to continue making their plans. Walking the hallways searching for Arwen while wondering if Elves were allowed to retire, he suddenly stops and take a sniff. Smirking, he turns abruptly around to see Arwen has been following him. Crossing his arms over his chest, Erestor asks, "I'm most certain you heard your father ordering me to watch you."

Nodding, Arwen smirks. "Poor you, huh? Well, I'm gonna make it easy for you."

Suspicious yet curious to know any way to make his orders easier, Erestor asks slowly, "What do you mean, 'easier' for me."

"Listen, Ada wants you to watch me so I don't do something bad to my brothers, but I know you don't want to be anywhere near me today." Arwen explains. She tries to get closer to Erestor to whisper to him but he stops her.

"You can tell me just from where you're standing."

Sighing in frustration, Arwen obeys but speaks in a lower tone. "Besides wanting revenge on Ella and Elro, I don't want them taking that stupid message of my father's to Aragorn. Imagine, my beloved taking the Paths of the Dead! He could die! Aragorn, son of Arathorn...!"

"You're boring me," Erestor speaks in monotone.

"All right, all right, I'm getting to the point. Which is: You're going to help me make sure my brothers don't make it to Aragorn."

Narrowing his eyes, Erestor says, "And why should I help you."

"Because I know you wish to ask Vanië to the celebration feast which is coming up next week."

Smirking to see Erestor blush, Arwen continues to press the advantage. "Vanië is my friend's brother's cousin's husband's father's wife's daughter."

"What?" Erestor asks with a blank look.

"Don't make me repeat it. Anyway, I know how shy you are to ask her to accompany you."

"I'm not shy," Erestor says sullenly. "She just doesn't like it how every other Elven maiden swoons at my feet if Glorfindel's gone."

Agreeing with him, knowing he was right about that, Arwen continued, "But I can arrange for her to at least talk to you. You can then work up the courage... I mean, 'take the chance' to ask her out."

Mulling it over, and liking the idea, Erestor asks the most important question. "So... how does this work with my helping you to keep your brothers from leaving Rivendell."

"Easy, now listen carefully."

After explaining her plan, Erestor sniggers. "Perfect."

"And best of all," Arwen smiled brightly, "father will never know!"

Erestor calls out to Elrohir in the halls of Rivendell. "Elrohir! I didn't expect to see you. You are leaving soon, are you not?"

The son of Elrond stops and looks at Erestor suspiciously. "You're supposed to be watching Arwen."

"She locked herself in her room and I have Glorfindel watching the balcony," Erestor says offhandedly. "Anyway, I just wanted to tell you congratulations on getting to escort Írimë to the celebration feast which is coming up!"

Elrohir looks at the chief counselor in surprise. "What?"

"You mean?" Erestor acts astonished. "That means she has yet to tell you..." Looking embarrassed, he stutters, "Maybe it was supposed to be a surprise, I'm sorry for mentioning anything."

"Besides," Elrohir adds solemnly. "I shall be away for the celebration feast."

"Oh, I thought just for her you would return after delivering the message to the Dunedain. Well, no matter." Erestor then adds lightly, "I suppose she shall go out with Velco."

"VELCO!" the son of Elrond shouts. "That Elf doesn't deserve Írimë! What is she thinking, going out with him?"

Erestor shrugs. "You will be gone anyway, I guess. So you will not have to worry about it too much." The chief leaves a bewildered Elrohir to worry about the beautiful Írimë going out with Velco instead of him...

"No!" Elladan exclaims. "She would never go out with Velco!"

Erestor nods very seriously. "I tell you the truth, I know for a fact that Írimë plans to go to the feast with Velco."

"Why, how could she? Just because I cannot make it to the feast, she decides to go with that, that, that – "

"Let's not finish that thought, shall we?" Erestor interrupts quickly. "Besides, you shall not have to worry about since you will be gone. Many blessings on your trip, my lord."

Erestor leaves a bewildered Elladan to worry about the beautiful Írimë going out with Velco instead of him...

Going into the stables, Erestor sniff the air and following his nose, finds Arwen hiding in one of the stalls.

"Did it work?" he asks quietly.

"Like a charm!" Arwen giggles like a young Elf. "Írimë's a good friend of mine. She knows how much both my brothers love her to death though she doesn't care a wit for them. She's agreed to play along with us and she didn't have to wait long. Soon after you spoke to my brothers, one at a time they went to her and pleaded with her to go out with them. Of course she agreed."

Erestor frowns. "I can't help but wonder if the twins will do exactly as you planned."

Arwen rolls her eyes. "I've grown up with them for the past couple of thousand years. I know them, too well in fact. They'll do exactly as I planned."

Hearing some voices, Arwen tries to drag Erestor into the stall she is in. He shakes his head. "I'll find my own stall thank you," he whispers with a smirk.

"It's a good thing you're on my side right now," Arwen growls. "Now hide, it's Ella and Elro."

The two Elves hide just as Elrohir and Elladan enter the stables. They speak loud enough for Arwen and Erestor to hear them clearly.

"I agree with you completely, Elro, we should separate when traveling to Tharbad. By taking two different paths, one of us is sure to find Halbarad and his men."

"Then whoever finds them, travels together with them to Enedwaith where we will rendezvous in ten days no matter what."

"Right," Elladan replies.

"From there we travel to Rohan to find Aragorn. Agreed?" Elrohir asks.

"Agreed."

"Now Elladan, I think I shall leave later on tonight, what about you."

"Quite right Elrohir. Let's just say our good-byes now."

Arwen and Erestor, who are still hiding, hear the brothers clasp hands then depart. As soon as they are out of earshot, Arwen jumps up and whoops. "It worked! It worked! I KNEW it would work!"

Erestor gets up and daintily brushes hay off his clothes. "Refresh my memory on how this is going to work."

"You worry too much," Arwen says in disgust. "Anyway, though my brothers tell each other they're leaving tonight individually, they'll just hide away in Rivendell until the feast which is in five days. They will be planning to take Írimë, then sneak away the next day to rendezvous with the other brother who they think has gone to find the Dunedain."

"When in fact neither of them has left, so neither of them has found the Dunedain – "

"Exactly." Arwen smiles. "Am I just too cruel, or what?"

To be continued in epilogue...

Author's Note: At first the plot seems a bit confusing and even after reading a few times over, you still might not get it. But don't worry, the epilogue will be explaining everything, and it will all make sense!

Thanks to all my fans who encouraged to write the "Why Did They Do That?" series!