Summary: Each night Gabriella would lie in bed for a few seconds before falling asleep, but before those few seconds, she would stare back at a box filled with memories of a past life that she had lived, with a boy.
The italics are Gabriella's thoughts.
Letters that I Never Opened
Every night, Gabriella would exhaustingly drive home from work, slip her shoes off, take a shower, put her pajamas on, and immediately go to bed. Her long shifts and workaholic nature had deprived her of sleep and each night, she would comfortably lie in bed, secretly dreaming of waking up to a different life, because the life that she had been leading now was misled, predictable, and lonely. This empty apartment with no laughter and no joy had deprived her of happiness, so she had thrown herself in her work just to avoid the pain of being alone, for being alone was the worst emotion that one can feel, especially an extremely vulnerable person like herself.
But every night, a few seconds before she lay to sleep, she would stare at the old, worn, tattered brown box in the dusty corner of the night table reminiscing, until she fell to sleep, repeating the same cycle again.
This was her life now, and despite how much she would do to gain everything back, she knew the rest of her life was the price to pay for leaving the boy that she had once loved, the friends that had held her in her heart, and the mother that had sacrificed everything. She had left them for supposidedly a new start, a better life, when really the life that she led now was a lie. She was living a life of a lie, and most of all, she was a lie.
She said she was happy to everyone, convinced that she had a Cinderella story, made it from the bottom of the business to being one of the most powerful women in New York. But really, the insides of her ached and pained her until there was no longer any emptiness to bear and she had to move on, choking back the tears as she woke up from her nightmare of a life again.
Gabriella never opened the box each night, and claimed to herself that she would never have time too, but when she sat down on her bed on a stormy day-off, she realized she had no excuse anymore and stood up and reached for the tattered, torn box. Once sitting down with it, she opened it and filled with letters, memorabilia, and photos of her past life, she sat rummaging through it, finally finding an envelope at the bottom, titled Gabriella.
It was the letter. The letter that she had received from him a few years back. She was too stubborn to open it. She refused too, even after she found out about the tragedy that had occurred exactly 1 year ago. The news about him struck her hard, but she knew if she went back home, her mother and friends would only make it worst.
But once she had finally touched the letter again, and felt nostalgia and waves of memories coming over her, all she could do was slowly tear it open and a sheet of paper with messy handwriting and a strip of paper with an address.
June 25
Dear Gabriella,
It's been years, years since I've spoken or communicated with you in any sort of way, and I have no idea how to start now. You won't believe how many sheets of papers I've thrown, letters I've torn, and the amount of effort I have put in just to be able to write something perfect for you. But I can't, because all these years I still can't manage to breathe or speak or focus around even though you are still not here with me. But what I can manage to say now, and blurt it out without feeling ashamed is that I love you, I hate to express that here, but I do. I don't know how else too, but I'm afraid to talk on the phone with you, so I could only do this through a letter that comes from every inch of my heart. Loving you is forever, or rather, forever's not enough to love someone, especially someone like you. Forever is a long time obviously, but no matter how many letters I write, how many other women I date, and how many times I try to say good-bye, I will never be able to stop loving you forever. I've tried, believe me, but I can't. Ever since I met you, I can't stop thinking about you, wishing you were here. I know we ended things badly but like I said, I will always love you forever and still, forever is not enough. Forever's not enough to love a person, no matter how many days, how many hours, how many minutes, or how many seconds one lives. For no one can measure the time it takes to love someone, for love is the deepest mystery that we can all endure, measuring love is like predicting the world will end at tomorrow, 3 years from now, 500 years from now. So through this mystery that God has given us, we must all rejoice every single day, every single moment and time, and capture it in our hearts and minds forever, for love is unpredictable and can stop at any moment, and no matter how long forever lasts, the amount of love from one person is enough to make us withstand for more than that. With the love that we shared before, you helped me into a better man, Gabriella, and with that I owe you everything, I hope you live a great life, and no matter what, I hope you remember our letters.
Love,
Troy
Gabriella cried, for the mother she had lost, for the friends she had hurt, for the broken life that she led, for the years she had wasted, for the life she had once loved, and for the man that had died that she had never gotten the chance to say good-bye to.
This story will be extremely angsty, just giving you a note of that. However, there will be some Troyella moments in here and the story will be consisted of flashbacks. Sorry, it may remain confusing now, but it will all clear up.