Indeed, I am alive. And well I wrote something. sweatdrop I'm doing much better right now, so I thought I would write and post something for everyone. My exams are good too 4/5 are done, I don't think I did too badly in any yet. cough history on Monday though…it'll kill me, surprisingly I even think I did fairly good in math cough surprise of the millennia…
Anyway, yeah this is a songfic…after a while
INFO:
Song – Nickelback–Do This Anymore
Disclaimer – No I don't own either the song or Beyblade
Pairings – Indirect Kai/Hil (references to I suppose)
Warnings – None for once, no language, no yaoi yayy I am proud of myself, I wrote something "clean" and "pure" –gag, choke– lol
Sum – Just Kai reflecting on their broken relationship, written along with Do This Anymore
Read on
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"…Do you…"
"Hm?" she asked, not even bothering to look up.
"Do you…still love me?" he ground out, glaring at the floor.
That got her attention, and she whipped her head up from her magazine.
"Of course!" she responded almost immediately, giving a huge smile. "How could you think otherwise?"
"…" Kai had nothing to say to that.
No I don't, no I don't, no I don't
Well no I don't find faith in your forced feelings
Not fooled by your misleadings
Won't buy this line you're selling
Tired of this lie your telling
Deep inside, Kai knew it was over. He and Hilary were over. They had been for a long time. He still loved her, as much as the first day, but he knew his feelings weren't reciprocated anymore. They once used to be but now…he knew that she didn't want to hurt his feelings, and that was the only reason she stayed.
I won't, I don't, no I won't do this anymore
I won't, I don't, no I won't do this anymore
She doesn't see that he did know. He knew that she doesn't love him anymore. But she kept up the act and when she confronted him, she would yell that he kept claiming that she didn't love him, but maybe, in fact, it was the other way around. But Kai knew that was all bull.
She says I'm only tellin' half of it
That's probably coz there's only half worth tellin'
In all honesty, Kai tried. He still loved her, told her so, and tried to pretend that everything was fine, nothing was wrong, and that it must be his imagination, making up notions that she didn't really love him anymore, it was all an act. But he knew that he was deadly wrong.
And every time I try to laugh it off
That's when you turn around and wind up yellin'
When am I gonna learn? Why? Cause I'm tired of hating
When will it be your turn? Why? Cause I'm tired of waiting
He didn't know when he would learn. He really didn't. He knew he shouldn't put up for being treated like he was. If he walked away he would be freeing both him and herself from this ruined relationship. He would be free to find someone who really loved him, and she wouldn't have to put up an act anymore, and she could find someone she truly did love.
I won't, I don't, no I won't do this anymore
I won't, I don't, no I won't do this anymore
Rationally (or not so rationally) mulling all this over in his head, Kai finally came to a decision…to leave.
Left on an eastbound train
Gone first thing this morning
Why is what's best for you
Always the worst thing for me?
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Well, definitely not the best I've ever written. I didn't take too long over it so yeahh…But since I'm a) writing anything at all after such a long time, I'll have to get back into a writing groove and b) also writing a songfic after quite a long time. So I suppose in a sense I'm just "relearning" the dynamics of a fanfiction. So anyway there you have it, yeah, my current phase is Nickelback, I might do some more Nickelback songfics, might or might not…
Anyway please kindly review everyone? (even if you hated it, review it just to tell me that…along with constructive criticism of course) yep. This will also be my last fic…again for a while…this time because once exams are over, I will be going on vacation, until the end of the month June. And after I come back…yeah of course I'll update stuff I've neglected for so long. Sorry for rambling here…and probably boring you all. Thanks though for reading. Bye.