Kaidan never asked her who she would have chosen if Thane hadn't died, if he hadn't been dying from the moment their relationship started. Shayna loved him even more for it. Even in the safety of her own thoughts, she didn't know the answer. She loved Kaidan, and she always would. That much she knew for certain. But she had loved Thane too. She still loved Thane, even after he was gone.
Sometimes she couldn't help but feel just a tiny bit of relief that the decision had been taken out of her hands. Even if she hated herself every time the thought crossed her mind.
"Do you ever regret saving me instead of Ash on Virmire?" Kaidan whispered to her one night, near the end of the war.
In her mind, scenes played out differently. She pushed forward during that mad rush against Saren, saved Ashley and sacrificed Kaidan. When she met Thane on the Normandy, she was mourning the death of the man she had loved rather than hating him for not believing in her. In another world, Thane could have her everything. In another world, she wouldn't have yielded nearly as easily when he tried to push her away.
In another world.
"Never," she whispered back, pulling him a little closer.