AN: Okay, so it's official. I'm obsessed. Enough said, I think. This is pure crack and it's all the sugar's fault. THE SUGAR MADE ME DO IT!!!!!
A Different Kind of Release
"Your Majesty."
"Sir Bedivere. What brings you here today?"
"A request of sorts, Your Majesty."
"Oh?'
"Yes, Sire. While all of us are quite glad that you and Master Merlin have finally realised your feelings for one another, we've noticed that when you two are being…well, intimate, things levitate. Particularly at night, Sire, when both of you have retired to your bed-chambers. I'm afraid, Sire, that it's rather difficult to do our jobs when things are four feet in the air."
"Thank you, Sir Bedivere, for bringing this to my attention."
AMAMAMAMAM
"Good morning, Sir Bedivere."
"Your Majesty."
"Tell me, what has the castle in such a tizzy this morning?"
"I'm afraid, Sire, that several fires broke out spontaneously last night, all at the same time. Perhaps Master Merlin should try something different, Your Majesty."
"Ah. Thank you, Sir Bedivere."
"Not a problem, Sire."
AMAMAMAMAM
"Sir Knight."
"Good morning, Your Majesty."
"Sir Bedivere, why is it that everyone is just merely sitting around and not doing any work?"
"That would be because we can't see, Your Majesty."
"Can't…see?"
"Yes, Your Majesty. There was a bright flash of light last night, Sire, and it has rendered us temporarily blind. The Court Physician says that we should have our sight back by the end of the day, Sire."
"I take it another form of release would be preferable?"
"Yes, Your Majesty."
AMAMAMAMAM
"Sir Bedivere, why is everyone so quiet today? The silence is quite odd."
"The events of last night, Sire, were rather shocking to all of us."
"Oh? Do tell."
"It seems that everyone got a bit…randy, Sire."
"Randy, Sir Bedivere?"
"Yes, Sire, as in we bedded the closest person, whether they were male or female. If I might suggest a different release for Master Merlin?"
"We'll see what we can do, Sir Knight."
AMAMAMAMAM
"Sir Bedivere, why are the lower corridors wet, and the dungeons flooded?"
"Master Merlin's release last night caused the water to surge, Your Majesty. It will take a few days for things to dry off. Fortunately, non of the stores were spoiled."
"I will suggest another release, then."
"Thank you, Sire."
AMAMAMAMAM
"YOUR MAJESTY."
"Why are you shouting, Sir Bedivere?"
"PARDON, SIRE?"
"WHY ARE YOU SHOUTING?"
"PARDON?"
"Oh, for…where's that parchment…" Why are you shouting, Sir Knight?
We've temporarily lost our hearing, Sire. We are slowly getting it back, however.
Merlin?
Yes, sire. It seems that his scream was amplified by the magic last night.
Dismissed, Sir Bedivere.
AMAMAMAMAM
"Your Majesty, Merlin."
"Gwen. What can we do for you at this early hour?"
"Two things, Sire. It seems that during his release last night, Merlin animated majority of things within the castle. Sir Bedivere requests his help in rounding them up and returning them to normal."
"Ah. And the second thing?"
"Well, Sire, the castle residents had a meeting this morning after realising what had happened during the night, and we respectfully request for Merlin to go back to levitating objects. We've found that we can deal easily with objects floating four feet above where they're meant to be."