Chapter 1- Lost at last stock
All was great in the Super Smash bros. universe. Everyone has survived the destruction caused by Galeem and Darkhon, and to celebrate their heroic victory, they threw a humongous party at Villager's mansion. Bayonetta was killing it on the dance floor, Isabelle and Captain Falcon were having a drinking contest (Of course Isabelle won), and Peach baked two huge cakes, one for everyone, and the other for Kirby. The party was organized by Isabelle, and she even got K.K Slider to D.J. Everybody was having a gay old time.
Everyone accept for Lucas, who was standing silently and alone by the punch bowl. Lucas wasn't the most sociable, he was shy and timid, and wasn't confident enough to put himself out there. His closest friend at the party, Ness was showing off his sick-ass yo-yo tricks to Pokémon Trainer and Young Link then suddenly he noticed Lucas was all alone. "Sorry guys, but I need to talk to Lucas. I'll show you guys some more tricks later" Ness said somberly. Ness put away his yo-yo and approached Lucas. "Hey man, can't help but notice you were alone" "Oh, umm.. I'm okay Ness. Just needed some alone time that's all..", Lucas answered nervously. Ness raised an eyebrow; it wasn't like Lucas to just lie like that, so Ness knew something was wrong. "Come on big L, you can tell me what's wrong" "Really, nothing's wrong" "Lucas?!". Sweat ran down Lucas' forehead and his face turned red. "It's a little embarrassing" "You can tell me, I won't tease you" "Pro… Promise?" "Promise", Ness nodded. Lucas took closed his eyes and took a deep breath, "I think... I got a crush".
Ness then grew the biggest grin, he was overjoyed that his young timid friend has discovered love, he was worried he would be sad and depressed forever after all the terrible things that has happened to him. The only reason they were friends in the first place was because they had so much in common, but Lucas'... screwed up past always put a dent in not just their relationship, but Lucas' social life in general. Everyone felt bad for him, but were also put off by his negativity, so everyone just saw him as "the sad one". With this new found crush, Ness was hoping this could finally get Lucas out of his shell.
"Oh man, my bro Lucas, shot by Pit's arrow! So who the lucky … um … person?!", Ness asked enthusiastically, meanwhile grabbing some punch. Lucas was still reluctant, but pointed to the person that has been making his heart race. It was none other than the beautiful Rosalina, who was yapping about with her two besties Peach and Daisy, with Luma in her lap. Ness spits out his punch once he saw the person who was pulling on Lucas' heartstrings. "Rosalina?!" "What is it?" "Nothing, I'm surprised Lucas, I always assumed you were gay!" "What gave you the impression I was gay?" "Nevermind it doesn't matter. What is it that you like about her?". Lucas was already beyond flustered but trusted his friend enough to tell him. "Well she really nice… and um beautiful, I love how her legs never touch the ground, and how she is the only person other than you that has given me the time of day. I get butterflies even just thinking about her", Lucas said with a awkward smile on his face. "But she is way out of my league. She is super popular, I'm not. I'm 13, she is like 13 million. Everyone seems to want her, so why would she ever pick a nobody like me?". Ness could help but agree, he couldn't imagine Lucas getting together with Rosalina, but he was still determined to get Lucas to put himself out there. "Don't say that, you have so much going for yourself: you got cool hair, you are the nicest guy I know, you have the strongest upsmash out of everyone, and you can use PK Love. I bet Rosalina thinks you're out of her league!". Lucas smiled a bit from hearing that, but he knew his friend was only cheering him up than actually telling the truth. "I appreciate you trying to cheer me up, Ness, but I can't ignore reality. It will never happen", wept Lucas. Ness felt bad for exposing Lucas as much as he did, but he still wanted to help his friend in anyway he can. "Look man, if I have to be honest, you'll never be together with Rosalina, but you can't hide these feelings forever. It will eat up your insides, take it from me. So just go confess to her, it may sound dumb, but…" "ALRIGHT EVERYONE, YOU NEED TO SHUT THE FUCK UP RIGHT NOW!"
Before Ness could even finish his sentence, Mario was screaming on the top of his lungs in the middle of the dance floor. "BECAUSE THIS PARTY IS SHIT! DO Y'ALL KNOW WHAT YA NEED TO DO?!" "WHAT?!", yelled mostly everyone. "Y'ALL NEED TO…" *the Mario theme song starts to play, "DO THE MARIO! SWING YOUR ARM SIDE FROM SIDE TO SIDE…", then everyone at the party starts doing the Mario, even Rosalina and her friends got up to join Mario. "Ness, come do the Mario with us!" yelled Young Link, while doing the Mario. "One minute!", yelled back Ness, "Look just consider my advise, okay? Come on, let's do the Mario!". Lucas considered it at first but he was still too scared to come out of his shell, especially with Rosalina being there. "I'm good, I'll just hang back here, thanks for the advise". Ness nodes at lucas and then joined in on the fun. Lucas just sighs and take another drink of his punch when all of a sudden he noticed PAC-Man is right next to him, eating up all the chips. Lucas and PAC-Man seemed to be the only ones not doing the Mario, which caught the attention of yellow muncher himself, "Yo, aren't you dat kid with the dead mom?", asked PAC-Man, having a hard time remembering his name. "*snaps his fingers* Larry!" "Um, my name is actually Lucas..." "I know Logan, I'm just meming on you. But I got to say, I didn't know you were dope. You think Mario is overrated too?" "Well actually…" "Hey Leo, you can be legit with me, I'm the chilliest fucking dude here". Lucas was put off by PAC-Man use of modern lingo, and didn't really know how to respond, but he felt the need to get a second opinion on what he should do with his feelings. "Hey PAC-Man can I ask you a personal question?" "Ya bruh, lay it on me" "I have a crush on someone" "Damn, who dat?" "Ro… Rosalina" "Dafaq, get outta here! I thought you were gay or some shit" "Why does everyone think I'm gay?!". Then PAC-Man started to list the reasons why everyone thinks Lucas is gay on his hand, even though he wore boxing gloves. "Yo haircut, gay, yo voice, gay, the contrast between your shorts and chicken-ass legs, gay. The way you cry like a little bitch all the time, gay". Lucas felt he was shrinking each time PAC-Man list a reason to why he seemed gay. "Why you think everyone always writing fanfic about you wanting to suck Ness' dick?! Cause you look gay!". After PAC-Man was done ripping away at Lucas' self confidence, Lucas came to a horrid realization. "You don't believe Rosalina thinks I'm gay, right?" Lucas nervously asks. "FAM, HAVE YOU BEEN LISTENING TO A GODDAMN WORD I SAID", PAC-Man clapped his hands together and inhaled. "Boi", he said as he motioned his hands towards a Lucas on the brink of sobbing uncontrollably. "Sigh, look Lincoln. I. Got. Chu. Fam." PAC-Man said while punching Lucas' arm on each pause. "Ya problem is you a beta male" "A what?", Lucas asked. "Bruh! You don't even know you beta. Lenny, a beta male are guys like you, weak bone, low testosterone, little dicks, short ass, no confidence whatsoever!". PAC-Man then points at Mario, who just so happened to be dancing with Rosalina at that moment. "Guys like me and Mario, we alpha. We got muscle *flexes*, money, style, loads of testosterone. That's why we can be confident and get all the pussy!". Lucas believed PAC-Man, after all, they were probably the most famous people in the entirety of Smash, but then he remembered something crucial. "Don't you and Mario got girlfriends though?" "If you mean Ms. PAC-Man, I dumped that thot. I also heard Mario and Peach are on a break, and if yo not careful, his next odyssey will be in yo girl's panties", PAC-Man points to the Mario and Rosalina dancing again. "But don'tchu worry, I. Got. Chu. Fam!" PAC-Man exclaimed while punching Lucas' arm again. "I'm deadass sick of Chads like Mario stealing all the girls from virgins like you, Liam. So I'm gonna help you get that pussy!". Lucas head sprung up when he heard that there was actually a possibility that he could get Rosalina. "Really, you can do that for me!" "Course bruh, follow my lead and you'll be knees deep in space pussy!".
At that moment, everyone finally stopped doing the Mario, and started getting ready to leave the party. "Kay, listen. Here's my number, meet me at Coconut Mall tomorrow at 8. 'Dere we start yo training. Aight?". PAC-Man hands his phone number to Lucas. "Um, okay see you tomorrow, Mr. PAC-Man. And thank you!". PAC-Man puts on his sunglasses (even though it was 10 o'clock at night) and heads to the exit, "Don't be late!". After PAC-Man left, Ness returned to Lucas. "Sorry about that Lucas. Man, Isn't Mario the coolest?!". "Yeah…", said Lucas melancholically. "Is the whole Rosalina situation still on your mind?" "Sigh, yeah.." "Look just confess to her, it's the least you could do…" "Hello boys!". Ness and Lucas turned to see Rosalina and her friends were right behind them; Lucas' face instantly turned red. "Ro...Ro…. Rosalina!", stuttered Lucas. "The party was fun, wasn't it?" "MMM, HMM!", Lucas replied too forcefully. "And Ness, I saw your yo-yo tricks. You're a really pro!" "Thanks, Rosy!" "Though Lucas I didn't see you that much in the party", noted Rosalina. "Oh! Um… well you see… ah". Before it was apparent to everyone else that Lucas was choking on his words, Ness stepped in. "Oh Lucas just has a stomach ache, that's all". Ness than nudged Lucas. "Dude, this is your chance!", Ness whispered to Lucas. Lucas' face turned even more red, there was no way he was confessing to Rosalina now, especially with Ness, Peach, and Daisy watching. Instead, Lucas took a safe route, "Hey Rosalina, are you doing anything later this week?". "Well in fact I am doing something quite important tomorrow. You see the Star Festival is tomorrow night and I was hoping you and Ness would come join us". Lucas was about to answer when Ness stepped in again, "Sure we love to. But wait I thought the Star Festival only happened every hundred of years". "After Mario reseted the entire universe, it now happens every year" exclaimed Peach. "It kinda less special, now that it happens every year, but it still fun. Everyone will be there", added Daisy. "And we'll be there too. Right Lucas?", said Ness, as he wrapped his arm around Lucas' shoulder. "So It's date?" Winked Ness. Rosalina, Peach, and Daisy start chuckling. "It's a date!", answered Rosalina. She then bends down and strokes Lucas' head. "I hope you feel better soon, see you at the Star Festival!". "Yo...you too", Lucas answered quietly.
Rosalina and friends then leaves to invite other smash characters, leaving Lucas and Ness alone. "This is your chance Lucas! Don't chicken out okay" "Okay…" "So in the meantime, Young Link and Pokémon Trainer invited me to go with them to play in turf war in Inkopolis. Want to come with? we need 4 people for our team!". Lucas would have said yes and also ask how humans would be able to participate in a game that requires the ability to squirt ink, but he remembered he had plans with PAC-Man. "Sorry, I'm actually busy tomorrow. Maybe next time". Ness was confused by his statement, seeing how not much happens at Lucas' home, but he shrugs it off. "Okay we'll see you at the Star Festival". Ness and Lucas start to head home. Eventually the wave to each other and go to their respective homes.