Hey, it me erb23. And this is my first fan fiction. I hope you can follow a few guidelines to help make sure you don't get confused. Also, note that none of the original characters are mine and belong to their respective owners, Matt and Trey. There will be OC's that arrive at different times through the story.
1Since this is a fan fiction for South Park, words will be purposely written in the way that they would say it in the actual show. For example, Kenny's speech will be put in [ ] to show that it is muffled. And the way that Cartman talks and pronounces things, obviously, will be spelled in a manner similar to the way he talks. This rule applies to all characters with unusual speech patterns.
2They are also 12-14 years old in this fiction, so technically the are seventh, going on eighth graders
Most importantly, use your imagination! Or whatever organ suites you. I really don't think it matters.
Otherwise, try to keep up and have fun
It was a day in late September as the students in Mr. Garrison's class prepared for a normal day of school. Most of the girls chatted amongst themselves and the guys tried to finish their homework. Mr. Garrison was nowhere to be seen, however. His absence wasn't much of a problem, but Cartman thought otherwise.
"Aye! Stan!" he yelled, though Stan ignored him. "Kahl. Kennie!" he continued, they ignored him as well. To his dismay, they were invested in their homework, like the rest of the guys. He stared in their direction for a while, and then got out of his seat. He snatched up their papers. That surely got their attention.
"What was that for, I was almost finished!" Kyle shouted
"You weren't paying attention. Now, if you don't mind, I have something to discuss with you. Mr. Garrison isn't here and we've been waiting forever!"
"So, isn't that better for us? Why do you care anyway?" Stan questioned
"Because, we're wasting valuable time. We could have gotten out of here already! I have the perfect plan too, all I need is your compliance. How's about it?"
"No, Cartman, we'd get caught anyways."
"How are you so su-" Carman said as the door opened. Mr. Garrison walked halfway through the door. He seemed to be talking to someone. Everyone in hid what they were doing.
"Cartman, give us our work back!" Kyle whispered
"Give me a minute." He whispered back. His eyes were focused on the door. He listened carefully to the conversation near the door.
"Anyways," Mr. Garrison said to the unseen person, "that's the school. I don't know why you chose to live here, but it's your funeral. But if I can make a suggestion, stay away from Eric. He's got a few loose screws if you know what I mean…"
"AYE! I RESENT THAT!" he screamed
"Sit down, cream puff." Mr. Garrison told Cartman. The students chuckled at his remark. Eric wasn't amused. As the laughter continued the unknown person walked into the room. The person turned out to be a girl, less than 5 feet tall, milk chocolate skin, medium black hair, and wore a navy blue jacket and pants with a white shirt. Her clothes seemed a bit loose. Cartman noticed this. His anger turned to worry.
"Oh no, this can't be." He said under his breath
"Settle down class," Mr. Garrison commanded. The room became silent as everyone's attention turned to the front of the room, "we have a new student today! I'm sure that you all will make her feel welcome." He scanned the room for an available seat. He saw an unoccupied desk to the right of Eric. "There's a seat next to Cartman, if you don't mind him taking up all of the available air."
"Okay." She replied. She walked to the desk calmly and set up her things. Cartman watched her carefully, trying to figure out her purpose for coming.
"Why are you here?" he whispered to himself
"Ok class, today we'll be working with integers….." Mr. Garrison said as he wrote on the chalkboard. His words faded as Cartman stared angrily in the direction of the new student. For a while, he just stared. Kyle noticed him, so he tapped him on the shoulder.
"What are you doing Cartman?" he asked. Catman turned around and pulled Kyle forward.
"I'm trying to see what she's planning." He whispered. Kyle frowned at his stupidity.
"What?" Kyle questioned. He shoved Cartman aside.
"She could be trouble, I mean, look at her!" Cartman whispered. He looked in her direction with kyle. She was taking notes, like the rest of the class. "She's planning something!"
"Why do you think that?" Kyle asked.
"She's black. She has to have something planned. I mean she just looks evil, over there, pretending to actually take notes. I'd commend her if I wasn't afraid of her diabolical plans" Cartman replied. Kyle wished he hadn't asked.
"Cartman-" Kyle muttered before he was cut off.
"And I have it all figured out. She shows up here, acting all normal, and she fools us all at first. Then, she slowly releases an army to attack small parts of the school, right. And then-" Cartman bantered.
"Cartman stop." Kyle said
"Wait, I'm not finished. So then she'll recruit more people and keep rising up until she has South Park. Then Colorado, then even more land-" Cartman continued. Kyle looked more concerned.
"Really, Cartman, SHUT UP!" he said
"No, you SHUD UP. Anyways, I-" Cartman tried to continue
"Just stop talking fatass!" Kyle argued
"Why? I mean don't you want to help me stop thi-" Cartman urged. Kyle sighed and face palmed himself.
"Just turn around….." Kyle sighed.
"What?" He questioned.
"Look behind you, god dammit !" Kyle said. Cartman looked at him for a second, then, he turned around. He saw a few people staring in his direction, one of which was the new kid. She looked confused. "See!"
By then Cartman was stuck in a place he couldn't get out of. The people looking at him made him feel compromised. "She must have already gotten to them!" He thought. He was hoping for a miracle.
"And it looks like it's time for lunch. You know the drill." Mr. Garrison stated. The students all got up from their desks and headed towards the door. Cartman sighed with relief and noticed how much time had passed. He felt safe.
"Well, you herd em, time for lunch." He said smugly. He got up and walked out the door without looking back. The new girl just sat there, confused. Luckily Kyle, Stan, and Kenny were there to provide assistance.
"You ok?" Stan asked
"Yeah, I'm fine." She said calmly. She got up from her desk. "So, what's with him?"
"Plenty, to name a few hundred…" Kyle answered. They all glared. "Never mind that; so, today's obviously your first day here. I'm Kyle, that's Stan, and He's Kenny. The fat one that just left was Cartman. I hope he didn't ruin your day already."
"No, not really. Before I forget, my name's Shannon. Feel free to shorten the name." She smiled, she noticed the room was almost empty. "We should get going."
"Okay, follow us!" Kyle stated happily
The school's cafeteria was full of vibrant conversations. Cartman passed the lunch line and headed for his usual table. He saw his friends from a distance, talking and just having a good time. As he grew closer he noticed his seat was taken. Normally, it wouldn't be that big of a problem. He'd just shove the person out of his seat. Get a few confused glares and silence from his friends. Then try to start a conversation and everything would be alright, at least for him it would be. There was only one problem; the new girl was in his seat. He finally reached the table.
"So, you guys didn't save me a seat like you're supposed to." He said angrily
"[She needed a place to sit. Besides, it's not like we have to.]" Kenny said
"She's also kinder than you." Butters stated
"And she's not fat." Craig stated, backing up Butters. Everyone started to laugh, which made Cartman furious.
"I AM NO FAT, I'M BIG BONED!" He screamed. He calmed down and acted unfazed "Screw you guys then, it's your loose anyway. Have fun with that little tramp!" He walked away to find a different table. However, the only one with a free seat was full of ginger haired children (Gingers as Cartman would say). Though he didn't want to, he sighed and sat there anyways. They all stared at him.
"I'm sitting here! If you want me to leave, you're outta luck!" He yelled as his tray slammed to the table. The Gingers all piled to one side of the table. They didn't want any conflict. He glared in their direction. His expression was dark and vengeful. They quivered in their area, afraid to move. His eyes then shifted away from them and towards 'his' table. He was jealous of the conversation they were having with the new kid. He wanted a way to not only stop her plans, but to get his friends back. He sat there, thinking. After a minute, he had an idea.
"There's only one way to stop this." He thought, "I have to be on HER terms…."
It was late in the afternoon and school was finally over for the day. The new girl, Shannon, was walking with Kyle and the other guys. They seemed to be having a decent conversation.
"So, im guessing you all know a lot about this place." Shannon said
"We sure do! Well, there's a theater, a museum, a community center, a mall…" Butters bantered. His voice faded in Kyle's mind. His attention was directed towards an object getting closer and closer to him. The object kept coming until it was easy to see that it was Cartman. He wanted to tell the guys to turn around, but it was too late. Cartman ran quick towards them, holding an assortment of markers. He looked pissed. He walked in front of the new girl and stared. He began to speak.
"So you think you can come up hurr in mah town and change everything. Well huney, do have news fo you!" Cartman screamed in his most offensive stereotypical 'black' voice.
"What do you mean?" Shannon asked. She had no idea what was happening and neither did anyone else.
"Biach, you know what the HELL I mean. You see, dem right der is mah property. You cant just come up in hurr and expect me to accept you. Now, you betta go on back from where you came from." He said angrily
"But I just got here." She stated, trying to back away from Cartman.
"Huney, do I gots ta spell it out fo you." Cartman said as he uncapped a few markers. He then reached over for Tweek and made him band over. Tweek cringed in fear. In huge letters on the back of his shirt, Cartman wrote 'THIS IS MAH PROPERTY _ SO U BIACHES CAN LEAVE'.
"Gahhh! What did he write, Its too much fucking pressure!" Tweek yelled. As he helplessly tried to find out what his shirt said, the others just stared.
"Now don't go makin meh mark up dis bitch, cuz I will!" Cartman yelled
"Why are you so crabby, I haven't even done anything to you!" She tried to reason
"Or have you!" He screamed "NOW GET OUT AND REASPECT MAH ATHORITAH!" He pointed in a direction south of their location. She just stood there confused. He stared at her until he was just furious, so he grabbed her hair and started pulling her in that direction.
"Hey! OWW! Let me go!" She screamed. The guys immediately stopped this.
"The fuck is your problem Cartman!" Kyle yelled. He seemed really pissed off.
"HER PLAN WAS TO REPLACE ME! AND YOU DIDN'T EVEN LISTEN TO ME, THAT'S MY PROBLEM!" Cartman replied angrily. He just stood there looking at the guys then at her then at the guys again. He noticed something strange and out of context. He calmed down.
"Wait a minute." He said, contemplating his next move. "Hey new kid! Can you two step?"
"What?" She replied
"Obviously not. Can you draw graffiti?" He asked
"No….."
"Can you play basketball?"
"No, I was never was able to. Why are you-"
"My god, its true. YOURE NOT BLACK!" He exclaimed with joy. She and everyone else just stared. He came close to her for a hug. His actions frightened everyone, "I mean your black but you're not 'black'!"
"What do you-" She muttered confusingly
"Ok, ok let me start over. My name is Eric Cartman, and you are?"
"GAHHH!" Kyle sighed
This was my first fan fiction, so im hopping for your compliance. And to be honest, im not much of a cartman thinker, but that'll change in due time! Ihope to update every to everyother week (dates may varry!)