In Your Fear

by babybirdblues

Tim Drake / He knows when he looks in the mirror he sees his mother. His mother who hovers over the little boy he once was. The long dead little boy. Sometimes he sees his father, but mostly his mother.

heartslogos:

If I may selfishly prompt you all again..

I would like to prompt (art, fic, drabble, AU, non-AU, new verse, existing verse, pairing of your choice) with this phrase:

(Because I've been struggling with what to do with it.)

"In the dark my name is Beloved."

(I really like this line but I have no idea where to take it.)

(So maybe one of you can do something?)

So this is for Hearts because I love her and wanted to fill her prompt again. *cuddles* I'm sorry it took so long to actually post this. You're going to hate me by the end of all this angst. ;_;

Title: In Your Fear

Verse: none, prompt

Characters/Pairings: Timothy Jackson Drake, Janet Drake, mentions of Jack, Dana, Bruce, Alfred, Dick, Kon, Damian, Jason

Rating: PG13

Excerpt: He knows when he looks in the mirror he sees his mother. His mother who hovers over the little boy he once was. The long dead little boy. Sometimes he sees his father, but mostly his mother.

---

Tim wonders what they see when they look at him.

He knows when he looks in the mirror he sees his mother. His mother who hovers over the little boy he once was. The long dead little boy. Sometimes he sees his father, but mostly his mother.

He'd rather see Dana.

Actually if he were perfectly honest he'd rather see himself.

Just Tim.

He doesn't want to be like his mother. Who whispered and laughed and made him repeat the things she'd say. He doesn't want the dark rooms and silent days. He wants sunlight shining through the windows and laughter echoing through the house.

He wants Tim.

He wants the Manor with Alfred. The apartment with Dick. The Tower with Kon.

He wants sunshine and Master Timothy, Little Brother, TimRobTim.

He wants his family - this family.

He wants the puppets and dark to disappear.

So he wonders what they see when they look at him. Because when he looks at them he sees sunshine and love and open, bright rooms filled with laughter and music.

He sees their flaws and their fears and loves them for it.

He doesn't want the perfection that comes with being Janet Drake's son. Because the perfection - Beloved - means none of those things. It means being Timothy Jackson Drake and he'd rather be Timothy Bruce Wayne.

He'd rather be Tt. Timothy, Babybird, Son.

He wants to be able to fear freely and for someone to be there and help him face it. Help him get over it and be stronger and thrive in the light.

Because the thing he fears most is his mother.