"Eddie, stop."

"You're embarrassing us!"

"This a terrible idea, even for an imbecile such as yourself."

~x~

The symbiote allowed a low growl to escape his throat as he resigned himself to the fact that his Eddie had every intention to ignore his complaints. Coiling like a snake around the man's shoulders, a perfect perch as to allow Venom to witness the show. Another one of Eddie's brilliant ideas, oh, this wasn't going to end well.

~x~

"Venom if you're not going to make yourself useful then go crawl up someone else's ass for a change!"

"You should be aware by now, you pussy, that your ass is the only one I intend on claiming."

"Dude, did you really just say that?"

"No comment. Asshole."

"Well...okay then."

~x~

Venom admitted a low hiss, dropping the conversation and instead fixating on the screen of Eddie's computer. The man was in the process of creating what he called a Tinder account. A place where humans go to meet potential mates because they're too much of a pussy to meet face to face first. Of course the list of qualified humans just had to include his very own, Eddie Brock, how charming. Ever since the doctor had proposed to Annie, well, after the first week of sporadic mood swings and flare ups Eddie had more or less revolved back to his usual self and routine. They both felt happy for Annie, after all she deserved to be content. Eddie himself had fully come to terms with it, though Venom hadn't expected for him to…what the fuck was he doing?

~x~

Venom himself felt offended and surprisingly threatened. No female was going to come between him and Eddie, nope, ain't gonna happen. Nonetheless, the symbiote tried to keep those thoughts hidden from his companion who was at this time scrolling through pictures of himself.

~x~

"Eddie...what do you think you're doing?

"Oh, you know, just looking for the perfect pic to impress the ladies with. The women like sexy."

"Please tell me you're joking."

"Shut up, you have no clue what you're talking about parasite. On this planet I'm a stud."

"More like a dud, Eddie."

"Fuck off!"

"Eddie how many losers even use this strange service?"

"A lot actually."

"Ah, turds of the sewer clump together."

"Number one, go fuck yourself. Number two, what the Hell man? Lastly, it's birds of a feather flock together you dumbass."

"Whatever you say Eddie."

~x~

Satisfaction swamped over Venom as Eddie gave an annoyed moan and closed his laptop. Which very quickly faded once the human began talking again after drinking a cup of hot chocolate with an overdose of chocolate mix, that pleased the symbiote greatly.

~x~

"You know V, I never thought you to be the jealous type."

~x~

That caught the symbiote off guard and Venom answered in silence as Eddie turned to look at him giving a smug smile.

~x~

"Who am I kidding? It should've occurred to me that something was up when Annie mentioned that you were behind the whole kiss thing in the forest. So what do you have to say, buddy?

~x~

Venom was sporadically searching for some sort of comeback, but essentially he had nothing. Though of course it would be against his nature to just leave the conversation at that, so he chimed in a final time for the night.

~x~

"Don't look at me, you're the one falling asleep like the loser you are on the couch at two a.m in the morning, leaving me alone and unbelievably bored with the only thing fucking on being those sickening romantic comedies!"

~x~

Venom begrudgingly retracted within his human host, trying in vain to ignore the laughter that pierced through the air. Perhaps, Eddie was less stupid than he conducted himself to be.

~x~

"If you only you knew V, I've become rather fluent at this whole sensing each other's thoughts and emotions crap. Don't worry, you'll always be the only anything that goes that far up my ass. God, you're one of a kind, you know that right?"

~x~

A low purr of contentment disturbed the still air and neither of them said anything more as Eddie drifted off to sleep leaving Venom once again alone with those romantic comedies in which he found almost enjoyable, though he'd never admit to that. Especially to Eddie. Though Venom knew that he was never completely alone, Eddie's loud snores were a testament to that. They would always be together, like two pickles in a jar.