Sickeningly Sweet

Rick walks nervously towards her door, unsure of himself and unsure whether he can do what he is going to do tonight. They have only been dating for a month, and though they have been wonderful together, he isn't sure this is the right move. He knocks tentatively at the door...

Kate tilts her head to one side curiously and checks the time. It's nearly past midnight, and she's been curled up on the couch for half the night. She stands, hearing another swift knock to her door, and her heart picks up a few beats, hoping it's him. Tucking her hair behind her ear, she takes hold of the door with anxious fingers, and pulls it open.

"Kate..." He knows it wasn't a particularly tough day at work, for either of them, but this is one of the great things about finally getting past the dance. Now they can do it together.

A smile spreads across her face, and her heart evens out, "Hey." She says softly, leaning her head on the door.

"Hey...I just thought maybe you wanted some company. I have wine?" He holds up the bottle like a 12 year old kid, hoping for that invite from the pretty girl.

"Well if you have wine." She says, pressing her tongue between her teeth and looking at him teasingly as she steps away from the door to let him in. As he walks past her, close enough to feel his warmth, she shivers, before turning away and shutting the door behind her.

Rick walks into the apartment he has seen much more of in the past month, and though they haven't had sex yet, he feels like this is more than he could ever imagine possible. Someone real, someone passionate...she wants him. Of course, he earned this, just as she did. They descended into hell together, and when they returned, they were products of a war long past. They had won the day, they had won this moment, and all the moments that would come afterwards. If he was at all to have a say, there would be many more to come.

"I...well honestly, I didn't want to go home tonight. Alexis is off at college, mother has her school, and whatever else that means, and I..." He laughs slightly at his own awkwardness, "I just wanted to see you. I was lonely."

Kate lets out a soft sound, biting her lip and padding a bit closer to him. "I missed you too, Rick."

It's amazing what a few months of hell and a month of heaven will do for two people in love, but as she sidles up to him, he smiles and nearly drops the wine in his hands. Carefully, he places the wine on the counter in the kitchen and looks into the greenest and most beautiful eyes he has ever seen, "I hate becoming a walking cliche, being a writer and all, but at some point we are going to have to stop being so adorable."

"oh I don't know." She replies, pressing her hip into his side a little and sliding her hand up his arm to grasp the one still on the bottle. "I kind of.." She pulls his hand from the cork, holding it in her own as she looks up at him. "like it, it's..."

"Exciting?" He finishes her thought as he wriggles his eyebrows at her.

She pulls her lip into her mouth once more, shaking her head.

"Exhilarating?"

She shakes her again, smoothing her other hand up his chest.

"Enticing?"

Her eyes dart to his lips. Certainly those are enticing. "Mm, no." She purrs.

"I'm running out of adjectives with an 'E' here..."

Kate chuckles, low in her throat as she plays with the button of his shirt. She doesn't really have a word for this. But...she feels something. Different, or perhaps it's always been there. Laced in the tension they have grown accustomed to these past years. But now? This exact moment, she doesn't think she can hold onto it any longer. She wonders if he can feel it, as she does. Tingling in her fingers, and evident in her breaths, which she fights to control as her heart quickens.

Rick thought that this stage of their relationship, the one where he feels such an intense sense of want and desire, where everything, every nerve was on fire when he was this close to her, would abate once they finally took that last step. He never doubted they would, but there were times when he found it hard to keep showing up. For her though? It is worth it every time he looks directly into her eyes and sees the love she has yet to profess. She will...and again, he will give her the time she needs...

"Longing." Kate finally says. One L word she can own up to, while the other is being spoken in her mind like a mantra, repetitive and taxing the longer she holds it in. Hangs onto it as it wants so badly to slip from her tongue. So she licks her lips.

Rick laughs lightly and hopes that she sees in his eyes what he see in hers, "L words are my favorite."

"Oh, they are, are they?" She presses further into him and feels the hitch of air caught in his lungs against her hand, and his hot breath exhales onto her face. She shivers.

"Oh yes. Lithe. Limber. Luxurious. Lin..." Rick looks up in desperate search of another appropriate adjective, something that speaks to this..."Luscious".

"Lounge." She raises an eyebrow, stepping away from him. Her hand pulls on his has she leads him to her couch. "Lazy." She falls into the cushions, dragging him along with her.

He collapses awkwardly onto the couch, unable to break this vixens spell, and he soon realizes that he never wants too. He falls in next to her as she cuddles up to him, her legs pulled up to her chest and his arms around her, "You know, lecherous is just as good a word."

"So is, lackadaisical."

Rick chuckles softly as Kate burrows further into him, her head resting on his chest, and he puts his feet up on the coffee table, more comfortable than he has been in a long time. "I thought we were going for a theme here?"

"You wanted a theme?" She looks up, running a finger over his growing stubble. "I forgot what it was..." She says in a low voice. Truthfully she was just to distracted. Trying to come up with other L words non related to the one she feels so deeply inside her. Maybe she could change the letter.. or maybe she should stop backing out.

"I think we were the theme, Kate." Castle chuckles again and feels her warm body against his. He doesn't know what he did to deserve this...well that's not true, he does know, but he is long past the days when he thought of himself like that. She did that for him, and everyday, he thinks...he hopes...that he can do something as profound for her.

"We are, aren't we?" She asks, almost sadly.

He can sense the change in mood, and he isn't quite sure how this...oh wait. Yeah that's it. Dammit. He didn't mean that and he certainly didn't want to place her on the defensive. He is a writer. He should know the power of words, even if they seem harmless, and it's this moment when he knows that he has to do something about it. He can't walk on egg-shells with her, but he also can't push her. He has to be himself, that is what will make this work, and while it's a something completely new to him, it's a gift he knows she gave to him..

"Themes can change..." She says, dragging her finger along his jaw again. She hadn't realized she stopped. "I didn't plan this, you know." She states, pressing lightly on the corner of his mouth.

He can barely contain himself, he knows what she said, but it's hard to concentrate when Kate Beckett is touching him like this, "You didn't plan...?"

She sighs on a small hum, resting her chin on him and catching the curious look in his eyes. Those blues, that even now, still pull at her heart strings. "When I met you..." She trails off, focusing on his lips which are parted.

"When you met me...?"

"I kind of thought you were an ass."

Rick smiles, "When I met you, I thought you were this sexy, tough as nails detective that I could charm..."

"Shh." She says placing a finger on his mouth. "I wasn't finished." She waits, feels the rumbled of laughter shake her as she lays against him.

Rick smiles again, "Go ahead."

She continues her soft caresses. "As I was saying. I thought you were an ass," Her finger makes it's way to his ear, skirting around it. "And annoying." She pulls on it.

Rick can hardly think, he can hardly breathe, and as his breath comes to him, he sees her smiling back at him. He wants to know what she thinks, it's the one thing he has always wanted, to peel her onion and discover the layers below. He should have known then, onions cause tears, and she certainly did for him. But every moment, every single moment from there to here, was inexorably worth it to him. He wanted real. He wanted substance. And with her, he feels it every time he thinks of her.

"But then." She soothes it, "after a while...I forgot about those things, because they weren't true."

And that is why. She believes in him. Nobody except Alexis and Martha ever believed him, and most of the time, he would have been apart of that list. She buoys his spirit, his heart, and his mind. She challenges him and makes him a better man. He doesn't think he will ever be able to thank her for that, but if she will let him, he will spend the rest of his life trying.

"I mean..." Her fingers splay across his cheek, and he turns his head into them. "You're still annoying...but." Her thumb brushes the corner of his eye. The place where his feelings truly show. Those smiling eyes. "It's adorable."

Rick can't smile at the term of endearment, mainly because he is already smiling and sighing into her touch, but he knows that she can see his feelings behind his eyes. "You aren't so bad yourself."

She laughs, pushing the hair from his forehead.

He leans forward and without thought, kisses her on her lips, and though they have done this before, it is like the first time all over again. It isn't an urgent kiss, one born of four years of pent up desire, it's slow and languid, and they both seem to lose themselves in each other.

When they pull apart, he looks at her and marvels once again, "Thank you."

"Always." She replies, pressing another kiss to his lips, soft and quick, like a habit.

He smiles again, "I always liked words with A too. There is amazing and adorable..."

"I already said adorable."

"Hey, poetic license here!"

"License? How about literal."

"I think the dictionary only has so many L words...I've checked."

She props herself up now, still pressed against him but with her elbow on the back of the couch, and her hand on his chest. "Maybe not."

Intriguing is the word he thinks of now, though it has to push past another more prominent word, and though he doesn't want to push, he can feel that 12 year old rushing to the surface. He decides to let the twelve year old out just a little, "Oh?"

"There is always, lascivious." She plays with his hair again, distracting herself as her heart hammers in her chest and her tongue tingles with that word. "But I think I will go with a more...tame sense of the word."

Rick is captivated by the words that spill forth, "Do you know how sexy it is that you know that word?"

"Which word?" She asks, dipping forward towards his ear. She feels him shudder and smiles, her own breath hitching almost painfully as the word beats against the walls of her chest like a caged bird. "Love?" She breathes on a wisp of sweet air, and her own heart pangs with awareness and freedom she's not sure she's ever felt before.

Rick is caught completely off guard. His mother was right, when he needs words, he can't seem to find the right ones. He isn't sure about this moment, but every moment with her is such an adventure. He beams into the night, his happiness rains down on both of them in her apartment, and it is as if the world suddenly makes sense.

Now that the word has been set free from her, it's taken flight, fluttering around them enveloping her and she finds she needs to say it again, but with more conviction. She rests her cheek against his, closing her eyes and taking in a few breaths. Dive in.

"I love you."

He understands now why the caged bird sings. He never got that poem, not really, but now as he basks in her words, he knows that the reason the caged bird sings...is because he can't fly. And that's the point. He is flying now, flying through his own life, on the wings of the woman he loves, and he isn't sure whether he ever wants to come down. She lifts him higher and he knows he wants to return the favor...though he has to be a bit cheeky, "I know."

She wants to be mad at him, for seemingly ruining her shining moment. But who would he be if he didn't push her boundaries just a little. "Annoying." She says with the raise of an eyebrow, again proving her earlier statement.

He smiles. It's proof that no matter what they say or where they go, they will essentially be themselves. "I love you too."

Kate lets out a heavy sigh, closing her eyes for just a moment. When she opens them once more, he's watching her. She runs her hand over his gently stubbled cheek again, "You're also creepy. Stop staring."

He chuckles as he feels her body against his, "Can't help it. A beautiful woman who just told me she loved me."

She smiles at that, "I found our theme."

"Oh? What's that?"

"Sap. You know that gooey like substance that seeps out of trees?" She watches him nod and can't help but allow her happiness to shine brightly. She can hardly keep from laughing, "Well you're laying it on thick. I could coat my pancakes in it for a lifetime."

"Oh really? Is that ALL you want to coat it in?"

She slaps his chest playfully. "Really, Castle?" She smirks. She gets up from the couch, her hand tracing his body as she walks away, sashaying her hips as she goes to the fridge.

He is mesmerized by those hips, but more so, by the woman who so gracefully floats into the kitchen. The smile he has on his face will be permanently seared onto his lips if he keeps this up. This wasn't what he planned this night, but he is so happy he decided to take a chance. So happy that this amazing and incredible woman let him in the door.

As she walks away, he can see the playful smile adorning her beautiful face, and he is in awe of her as she glides. "Hey, nine-year old, remember? And don't think I'm going to let that 'lifetime' comment go unheeded."

Kate looks over her shoulder as she opens the fridge. She watches him practicality drooling on the back of the couch, his eyes like giant blue saucers glued to her every move, and she knows that what she is about to do is just as bold as his move tonight. If this were a game of chess, like it had been so often before, he would have placed her in check. This was her attempt at checkmate. Not because she wanted to win, but because she wanted him too.

Dive in, Kate. Allow a lifetime to be defined by this moment...

She smirks, narrowing her eyes and grabs something from the door, closing it effortlessly. She looks down for a moment and then bites her lip deviously before walking into the hallway and stopping at her door...

"You comin, Castle?" She asks, holding up a bottle of syrup.

A/N: So this is just a little one-shot Jerryst316 and I wrote together. Tell us what you think?