GOOD BYE ATLANTIS
I do not own Atlantis or any of the Characters.
Spoilers for 'Poisoning the Well', 'Sanctuary' and' Trinity'.
Rodney walked along the empty corridors of Atlantis not excepting to see anyone since they were all at the party in the gate room. He didn't know what the party was about, but he certainly knew he wasn't welcome. Not there, nor any other place on Atlantis for that matter.
The music and laughter followed him around the dark corridors, weighing like a stone around his neck, reminding him of everything he had lost since Doranda.
He entered his lab and powered up his laptop letting the silence of the room wash over him. Then, letting out a deep sigh he began typing. His fingers flew over the keys as his mind absently wandered back to Doranda.
Rodney knew he had no-one to blame but himself for his mistake, and in a way having no-one to blame or shout at, was a torture in itself. He knew he deserved it but sometimes having no-one to talk to was hell on earth or Atlantis. He wished that someone would forgive him. Whoever said it was better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all was a fool in his book. But the more he thought about it, the more he realized that he was the biggest fool of all. It had never bothered him before that people never made eye contact when he walked down a corridor, or that he was never asked to join in on socials. So why now? He silently cursed himself for letting people get too close.
Once again, people now only approached him because they needed the head of the science department's permission to carry out their projects or needed something from him. Not to see how he was doing or even to say hello.
So now Rodney kept himself to himself. He only went to the mess when he knew it wouldn't be too busy, and even then he would take his food back to the lab or his room. He couldn't bear to listen to people laughing and joking with their friends. It reminded him too much of what he'd lost.
He couldn't help but let out a snort when he thought about friends. Maybe he hadn't actually had any to begin with. Because friends would forgive you in time, wouldn't they? Had not Carson made a mistake on Hoff, and wasn't it only sheer luck that Chaya hadn't meant any harm to Atlantis or Shepherd? But they were forgiven because, after all, they were only human and everyone is allowed to make mistakes…right?
Rodney had sometimes wondered what would happen if he made a mistake, or God forbid, not be able to come up with the last minute solution and save the day. He wasn't a fool and though he knew he had the world's biggest ego, he also knew he was human, and therefore fallible.
Well the only thing they could do to him now was to take the one true and constant thing he had left in his life……his work. He'd be damned if he'd ever let that happen!
He finished typing and checked the email before clicking send, then shut down his laptop and looked around the darkened lab. As his resignation wound its way to Elizabeth he made his way to the door and bushed his hand along the wall. Rodney whispered a sorrowful goodbye to Atlantis, and then headed to his room so he could pack for the long and lonely ride home.