This Sorrowful life
Every day and night was hell for this wolf. His emotions plagued his every thought and every action. He had never felt this depressed in his entire life. The wolf had lost everything he ever loved, all because of his stupidity. He would sacrifice anything to go back in time and fix things, but such a desire was impossible.
Drake met a pack months ago, and they gave him a warm welcome. The wolf loved these pack members so much that he considered them a second family. Many would think that is silly, but the wolf use to have a social problem. He use to be very shy around strangers, refusing to show his face like a five month old pup. When he met this pack, all of that loneliness was washed away. The other wolves were nice and caring; something he never thought he'd see in another creature. His past was nothing but being teased and bullied, almost traumatizing him.
As time went on, there was a certain wolf in that pack that Drake was very close with, well, at least he thought he was close with. This wolf had a very interesting personality, and as time went on, that wolf told Drake some of his past. It made him feel bad for his friend, and he reassured him that he would never betray him.
That's when it all went downhill.
Because Drake broke that promise, and now he was paying the consequences. That one wolf meant more to him than anyone else, and till this day, Drake still doesn't know why. The day Drake's friend found out he stabbed him in the back was the day things would never be the same. Drake desperately tried to ask for forgiveness, but his friend had already made up his mind. However, Drake didn't blame his friend one bit. He wasn't going to be angry at him for not giving him another chance, because Drake knew what he was doing, and yet decided to keep his actions a secret instead.
Drake was emotionally devastated knowing he lost the only friend he cared so much about, all because he had to keep his big muzzle shut. His friend meant so much to him. It was on that day that Drake ran away from the pack, never taking a look back. He kept running and running, not going anywhere specific. He couldn't stand being there for a second knowing that the one wolf he considered a deep friend would never treat him the same way again. He couldn't live like that.
Drake found a den at least ten miles away from the territory. Not a day went by where the wolf wasn't weeping for his friend, and his pack. Whether it was a couple of tears, or an uncontrollable sob. He did however, still have a couple of friend left that comforted him, and there was one specific wolf that stood out from the rest.
Drake's mate.
The only wolf that could put a smile on his face even through the darkest of hours. That one wolf was probably the only wolf Drake cared more for than the friend he betrayed. Even a simple nuzzle would be enough to destroy the depression that lurk in Drake's body. But then, he lost that wolf, and every other remaining friend he had left (this will be explained in the author's note guys). It was at that moment, where Drake once again came back the usual life he lived all those years back before he met the pack. A life full of loneliness. Till this day, nightmares of Drake's incident with his friend still haunt him. His friend words still rang loudly through his head.
"There is literally nothing you can do to make me forgive you"
But once again, Drake didn't blame that wolf, because what he did wasn't a mistake, it was a sin. Sins are not forgiven easily, especially if you knew what you were doing. Drake would do anything to hear his friend talk to him, even if it was an insult. He still wanted to hear his voice one last time. Drake still remembered the argument he had with his friend, and he agreed with every single insult he threw at him. He was a thick headed fool. And yet despite everything that happened those days back, Drake still cares for that wolf, and even though they may have different beliefs, it doesn't stop Drake from praying for his safety. How could he have been so foolish? Now that wolf won't trust him ever again, and all he had to do was tell him the truth instead of hiding it behind the curtains.
Drake sat down in his den, letting his tears freely flow down. He lost his mate, his pack, everything. He never thought he would feel depressed throughout his life, until now. He couldn't see his mate anymore, due to certain reasons. Sure he considered everyone in the pack his friend, but that one wolf that Drake use to talk to a lot, he considered him his best friend. Losing him was like losing one of his parents. Drake hasn't and will never get over that one day.
Drake clenched his fists in fury, growling as the memories of what happened those weeks back slowly entered his mind.
"You idiot! You freaking idiot!", Drake yelled out at himself, punching his den's wall as hard as he could. As a result he cut himself a bit, but he didn't care.
"He has enough trust issues you moron! Why did you have to make it worse for him!?", Drake told himself in anger, crying softly afterwards. After he regained his composure, Drake wiped his eyes and looked back at a small puddle of tears inside his den. The wolf looked at his refection in disgust.
"Because of your stupidity, he's never going to show love to anyone anymore…and it's all your fault", Drake said to himself, looking at his reflection.
Drake quickly exited his den and started heading somewhere he wished he could stay at. It was his pack. Drake may have ran away, but he cared for his second family so much, that every day he hid behind the bushes and trees surrounding the territory and checked up on everyone for half an hour (ghosting) to make sure nothing would happen. Whether it was a serious argument, or if it was a deadly conflict, he would be there for his family. He also did it for his friend, to make sure he was also okay. But deep down, he knew he wasn't okay, and he never will be. What Drake did to him was like giving him a wound that will never heal.
After almost an hour of walking, Drake finally made it back to his old pack, but he didn't dare step out of the shadows and out to the open. He quickly hid in some berry bushes and spied on the territory to see if anyone was out. It was mostly empty, except for two wolves, both of them familiar to Drake. And one of them stood out from the two.
Drake friend…the one he betrayed.
Just seeing him made Drake's stomach twist in knots. He was having a conversation with another wolf, who usually liked to relax in a rock he called home (you know who you are, you silly wolf XD). Drake kept staring at his ex-friend, and he could tell that he wasn't the same. He knew that inside that furry body, he was hurt. Just knowing that he had emotionally hurt an innocent wolf like him made Drake just want to stab himself with his claws, punishing himself for being such an idiot. Drake kept staring at the two conversing wolves, and let a couple of tears fall down his cheeks.
"I'm sorry Andrew", he said sorrowfully. Every instinct in Drake's body was telling him to run up to the two wolves and reintroduce himself, but he knew that his friend didn't want anything to do with him. As much as it pained him, Drake slowly turned around and headed back to his isolated den, ten miles away from what could have been him home. He didn't know how much longer Drake could live before he eventually killed himself. That one wolf, and every other wolf in that pack meant the world to him, because family is never forgotten.
Remember folks, always think before you do something, because this sorrowful life will almost never show mercy…
Okay, so before we get into what this onesense is about, let me start off by saying that i apologize for those of you who have been reading "Between Mercy and Severity". I understand that everyone is waiting for the neding, but the problem is that i am having problems trying to come up with a good ending that will satisfy everyone. So it's kinda like writers block. I haven't forgotten about the atory though, and if you have any suggeestions, PM me. I will be glad to hear your ideas!
Now unto the vent. *sigh* I joined a forum on the alpha and omega archive months back, and the people i met there were really good people. One of them though stood out from the rest, and that certain person, i liked him alot (as a freind of course). I care for those people still, and i still consider them family, but i don't go on that forum, anymore becuase that one freind that meant so much to me, well i stabbed him in the back. Now i'm not going into specifics, but what i will say is that this freind of mine, i did something he didn't like behind his back, and instead of telling him, i kept my dumbass mouth shut. I regret EVERYTHING i done to him, and he won't forgive me. But you know what guys, that's okay, because i deserve that. I owuld do anything to fix my wrongdoings, but that's never going to happen. See i'm a very antisocail person, and this forum was like a chatroom. So it kinda helped me get over my shy nature. Now not only did i lose a person that meant so much to me, i lost everyone in that forum (or pack if you would like). I know it sounds silly, but even though i don't know much about htese people, they mean a lot to me, espeiccaily that one guy. Don't really know why i'm so into him, but yea, i consider everyone thier really good freinds. So just keep one thing in mind guys and girls, if you want your freindships to last, you make sure you don't EVER, keep anything behind thier backs. That one person didn't deserve what i did to him. He has enough problems in his life, and my stupidity only added onto that list. And also, i can't see them anymore beacuse my parents have prohibited me from chatting with them. So now, i'm all alone once again. It's beacuse they have a trust problem with internet people that's all. Still, it devastates me to know that theses poeple that were considered really good freinds, and now i can't see them ever again. So that's it guys, i will try and conclude BMAS as soon as i come up with a good ending for it. That's all.