Disclaimer: No, I do not own Inuyasha. Only the almighty Rumiko Takahashi owns the copyright – I do however, own "Le Gasp"

Warnings: This is a romance/humor fic. In some parts of the story, characters will be OOC. If you are not a fan of Kikyo (and slight Hojo) bashing, I suggest you stop reading now. This is just for fun!

Bake Me Away

Brought to you by Sango The Lecher Slayer

Chapter 1: Cake in the Face

To Kagome Higurashi, age 22, the sound of the elevator arriving was only slightly less terrifying than rabid fangirls screaming at a pop star. The noise signified that she was indeed on the kitchen floor of one of the most exclusive restaurants in LA, "Le Gasp." Named after the ugly noise that fans made when their favorite celebrities were spotted, only the finest chefs were admitted to cook and serve the thousands of celebrities that poured in every year after events such as the Grammies and benefit concerts.

Ready to show her stuff, Kagome flipped her hair and muttered to herself, "I'm an awesome pastry chef. I am an awesome pastry chef." She took a deep breath and walked into her interview, chocolate torte hand.

Half and hour later, Kagome left the room disappointed and with a whole chocolate torte. Her "instability," or her inability to keep a job for an extended period of time, worried the manager. Head down, Kagome walked out, only to trip and fall.

"It'll be OK, Kagome," she reassured herself. "There's another interview in four days." Thinking about what pastry to bring to her next interview, Kagome crashed into something hard, knocking it over. Quickly glancing up, she looked at the thing—now recognized human, that she had collided with.

"Sorry, sir," she said sheepishly. Her extended hand was ignored, and Kagome rolled her eyes, walking away.

"Hey wench, sorry isn't good enough for me!"

"What did you just call me?" Kagome demanded angrily.

"You heard me bitch. I just called you a wench." The man shouted back.

"My name is—no I don't tell strangers my name. Go away, frea—" Kagome cut herself off as she got a good look at the guy.

Damn.

He was fine.

"Pull yourself together," Kagome muttered, "No matter how good he looks, that is no excuse to be swayed into letting him call you a wench and a bitch.'

But she wasn't alone in her observation. After quickly looking her over, the man smirked and asked, "What's wrong wench, cat got your tongue? What's wrong with you?"

Kagome huffed. "That is it! I officially have had the worst day of my life! First, My alarm didn't go off. Second, my cat fell out of the 3rd story window. Third, I'm probably not gonna get the Goddamn job that I need-"

Kagome was cut off by the man laughing and walking away.

Kagome growled impressively. "No. You asked. You get an answer."

She considered storming after him but took a few deep breaths. "It's OK, girl. He's an idiot. Walk away."

As Kagome was walking away, she heard the man yell on his phone, "Yeah, I just ran into this totally crazy bitch. What a psycho. Yeah, see you later babe."

The stranger didn't have time to close his phone or his mouth, as he got a chocolate torte to the face. "Jerk." Kagome said angrily. With that, she stormed back out and ran to hail a cab.

After he recovered from the shock, he started to yell at the immobile kitchen staff who were mystified by the man that had cake all over his face and $10,000 suit.

The stranger growled. Literally. "No one touches me! Get your asses over here. Someone grab that girl. And just what the hell are you all staring at! – Holy crap, this stuff tastes amazing!" In his ranting, he had accidentally started to consume some of the pastry. He paused mid-step and began to awkwardly eat the cake off of his face, then the box which landed on the floor.

"Holy shit, I need her at my restaurant. Girl! Wait up!" The stranger yelled.

Kagome spun around. "Oh goodness, it's that man. He's going to kill me. Or worse: make me pay to dry clean his suit." Kagome shuddered.

As passersby started to leave a wide berth around her, Kagome frantically hailed a taxi. "Please let my luck change, please let my luck change," Kagome chanted.

The stranger watched Kagome's fruitless struggle to get a cab and was thankful for the bus strike. Walking into the restaurant, he pulled the head chef and manager aside.

"How are things going here today?" He asked.

The response was a groaning head chef. "Terrible. Ve are in a mess. Zer is no pastry chef, for he quit zis morning!" he said in his French accent.

The stranger and manager looked at the head chef. "Really, Miroku?" The manager asked.

Miroku sighed and said, "I'm just trying to lighten up the mood, my dear Sango."

"And why do you need to lighten up the mood." Sango said darkly.

"Uhh."

"Well, lovebirds," the stranger interrupted, "I know someone who can replace our chef."

Sango looked like she could have hugged him, "Oh! Who is it?" She asked excitedly.

"Well," the stranger wheedled, "I don't exactly know her name. But she's amazing! Try her chocolate torte."

Sango and Miroku scooped some of the pastry off of the box, "Wow," Sango enthused, "You're right. I'm surprised that you actually managed to help the company!"

"Gee thanks," he muttered sarcastically. "I feel so loved around here."

"What are you waiting for? Go get her!"

"Huh?" Was his oh so intelligent reply.

"The girl! I'm assuming she's the one who… delicately placed this cake on your person," Sango said as the stranger glared. "Oh, just go already!"

The stranger stomped out, muttering to himself about insubordinate subordinates.

After a moment of silence, Miroku leaned seductively on the countertop and said, "Sango my dear, you know that leaves just you and me here."

Sango paused. "You know you're leaning on the stove top, right?"

"AHHHWHYDIDNOONETELLMEEEE?" Miroku shouted as he jumped from the stove.

As Sango gave him a what-were-you-thinking-you-idiot look, Miroku sheepishly said, "I thought I was so hot because of you? Dearest?"

Sango slapped him upside the head and he fell against the actual countertop.

When he came to, Miroku proclaimed "No need to worry, beloved Sango, for I awaken."

With a quick glance, he noticed she was no longer in the room with him, he was all alone. "Sango, my love, why do you leave me here! I shall die without yo—oh, hello Ashley! You're looking nice today."

Miroku casually stalked Ashley as she walked towards the front of the building, but decided against following her out when he saw his friend approach Kagome... who was talking to herself.

"You've done it again, Kagome." She muttered. There was not a single taxi that would stop for her. "Oh, who do you have to know to get a taxi around here?" Kagome groaned. She then squealed as a taxi came up to her. Kagome happily hopped into the car and sighed at the quiet.

"Me." The lurking stranger replied.

"What in the! Jerkface?"

"So, do you let random guys into your cab everyday?" The stranger asked.

"What are you doing here? Stalker!" Kagome shouted. The cab driver calmly turned on the camera installed for security purposes. This was going to be a bumpy ride.

"Look, I'm sorry! I just wanted to apologize to you," he stated.

Kagome paused. "What?"

"Please just take my card." The stranger insisted.

Kagome paused then said slowly, "No."

"Please."

"No."

"Please."

"No."

"Okay then here it is!" The stranger said as he stuffed it in her hand.

Kagome took the card began muttering to herself again, "Pompous idiot and total jerk and—"

"Do you always talk to yourself?" The stranger asked with a smirk.

Kagome opened her mouth to respond but snapped her jaw shut as she glanced at the card. She looked up and quietly said, "You're-"