I'M NOT THE ONLY ONE
«Is there anything else?»
Quinn looked down, biting her lower lip as she always did when she didn't feel comfortable. But he couldn't know, he didn't know her that well to realize that. No, nothing else, she told him everything: about her bully days, about the way she used to treat people, about her skank days, about that tattoo she managed to hide for almost three months, about that disastrous relationship with one of her professors at Yale -he was pretty embarassed about this one-, about that night with Santana... Yes, she told him everything. Everything but her. Everything but him. Everything but them.
Maybe because she didn't want to include that story in the endless count of her mistakes, maybe because she knew that without it there was a small chance that Biff could still see her as his perfect girlfriend. She just didn't tell him, she kept that secret for herself.
«No. Nothing else. You know everything now» she lied.
He stared at her for a little while, mulling on her words: she just confessed her past, all of her mistakes, all of her bad moments. He never thought she could be that problematic, but maybe there was still a small chance for her to become a respectable wife for him someday.
«Alright. It's okay, I understand.»
She finally sighed, relieved, closing her eyes for a little while as if she couldn't believe it. «Thank you. Thank you so much. I'm not that person anymore, I changed, I swear...»
«I know you did, darling, but I need to ask you a favor now.»
«Anything, just tell me.»
«You will always bring your past with you, there's no way you can erase it. But you'll have to cut your ties with all of this.»
She swallowed thickly, knowing what he meant. «It's okay, we can even never come back here again. We're leaving in one week in any case, right? If Lima is the problem, we'll leave it behind, I don't need to come back here...»
«No Quinn, not in a week. We're leaving now. You'll say goodbye to your friends and we'll leave for good. It's the only way.»
«I-I... I see. But I get it, it's just... Those guys have been my family and...»
«I'll be your family from now on. And your mother will visit us everytime she wants to. But that's it.»
Quinn bit the corner of her mouth, unable to breath for a second, until she heard a voice. His voice.
«Any problem here?»
She turned to face him, raising her eyes and meeting his: he knew everything, he knew what was going on, and there was no way she could ever lie to him. But she had to this time.
«Puck... Go away, okay? Everything's fine. We're just...» She met Biff's eyes, he was clearly waiting for an answer, and it was now up to her: she could stay, go back to her roots and be honest about herself for once...or she could leave, and start a new life of lies.
«...we're leaving» she finally stated, almost breathless. «We need to go back to New Haven. Yale's stuff, you wouldn't understand.» Being rude to him was totally unnecessary, but maybe it would be easier to leave him behind as well.
She took Biff's hand, and with a small nod she excused themselves.
«Quinn! Did you tell him? Did you tell him the truth?»
She stopped, staring at the ground: she knew what he was talking about, it had nothing to do with what she told Biff and everything to do with the only thing she omitted. And just for a second she wished Puck would unmask her and her lies, she wished he would save her in extremis. But he didn't say a thing, he didn't say her name.
«Yes. Yes, I told him everything.»
She glanced at him one last time, knowing it was the last one. Then she took Biff's hand and she walked away, never looking back.
9 years later
Quinn was staring at the outside, a cigarette in her hand, a glass on wine waiting for her: just a typical summer afternoon for her.
Biff left in the morning: she made breakfast for him, but he was in a hurry, and so she ended up throwing it in the trash can. It happened pretty often, he was always in a hurry, always late, there was always something else that came before her. And someone else.
She knew it, she knew she had been cheated on for a long while now, she found the traces of his mistress on the collar of his favorite shirt, a small detail that only a devoted wife could notice. The color of her lipstick was everything Quinn knew about her, and it was enough.
They had been married for six years now, six years of laughs, fake smiles, tears and lies. He was frequetly away, his job kept him busy, and even when he was home, he was always distant, almost a stranger to her. Kinda ironic, considering all of their friends...all of his friends actually considered them the perfect couple: he was a successfull business man, she, his perfect beautiful wife, the only missing thing was a baby, but it never came for some reasons. They tried for a while, with no success, and after a few months they just gave up, making love only on rare occasions. It was a nuptial duty, after all.
Funny, back in high school she learned men couldn't really stay without sex for a long while, so either Biff made an exception, either... No, she didn't want to consider that option.
That until the day the truth was thrown in her face, hitting her harder than that truck, during her senior year. She didn't say a word about it, which was the point, after all? They would argue, and then? She would leave? To go...where exactly? Back in Lima? No, too many memories, too many painful memories. And seeing herself in Judy's eyes would only hurt more.
All of her friends went on with their lives, they tried to keep in touch with her for a while, but they all gave up when she kept pushing them away. Even Puck. Especially Puck. He sent her a letter, God knew how he found her new address.
"I can't save you from yourself."
That's all his letter said. She hid it in the false bottom of her underwear drawer, and she never read it again.
All of those memories kept hitting her on those summer days, between a cigarette and a glass of wine. She glanced at the backyard: she managed to hide pretty well the traces of the bonfire she set in the afternoon. Well, at least better than Biff hid the traces of his affair. She just burnt some of his clothes, he wouldn't even notice that.
She suddenly winced, hearing the sound of his car. She rushed to her toilet, fixing her mascara before grabbing some fresh clothes to put them on. She wore his favorite perfume, and she finally walked downstairs, opening the main door with a smile and welcoming him home. She closed her arms around him, as he kissed her neck, smelling the scent of it. She stared at the space, as the smell of her reached her nostrils, but she eventually cracked a small, fake smile.
«Any problem here?»
Puck's words were still echoing in her head, but now she knew what she should have answered.