AN: Well it's been a wee while since I posted anything here. This is the first chapter of a series written for the Year of Cannon ficathon on RTChallenge. I'll be posting the rest over the coming days. Many thanks to Mrstater for betaing this.

Warnings: A naughty word and sexual references

They had argued tonight and they shouldn't have. They really shouldn't have, not tonight. Not when tomorrow was the day the Order would be mounting an ambush that they anticipated would become the most dangerous of battles and hoped would have the safest of outcomes. Tomorrow, Harry was to make an attempt on the life of Voldemort. Order members would support him their orders were to take out as many Death Eaters as possible. Tomorrow, there would be no holding back, with no attempts to bring suspects in alive, they would kill on sight, and if the Order were showing no mercy, you could be sure that the Death Eaters wouldn't be.

He didn't want her to go. He had pleaded with her, shouted at her, cried tears of frustration and fear. Throughout two years of war, he had kept her safe, protected her far more than he ever intended she would be aware of. Tomorrow he wouldn't be able to do that, all his efforts would have to be trained on ensuring that Harry was unimpeded in his attempt to get to Voldemort. She should stay behind, stay safe.

He looked down at her quietly sleeping body. Not as it usually was when she slept; tucked neatly into his, but separate. He wondered how he could feel so far away, so cold, so alone in the wake of her wrath. Desperately, he wanted to wake her, try one last time to make her see sense. Then hold her tight, make love to her as though it were for the first and the last time, to whisper in her ear that he loved her as she burrowed her face in his neck. But he didn't. He simply continued to watch the gentle rise and fall of her chest.

'You underestimate me, Remus. You always have.' These were the words, delivered in a low, hurting tone, that had been echoing in the far recesses of his brain for the past hour. Was it true? He supposed he could see why she might think it, but did he really underestimate her? He respected her, admired her talents as an Auror. He loved her for her shining spirit, quick wit and sharp intellect. His desire for her not to be present at tomorrow's assault was not due to any doubt he had in her abilities, hell, she was, no doubt stronger than he was. Bitter experience had taught him though; this wasn't the only thing that mattered. Sometimes plain old bad luck stole the day, he didn't want to risk that she might fall as a victim to misfortune. He didn't want.

He was lost to thought for a good half an hour before he made his decision swiftly. He placed a firm hand on her shoulder and shock it as gently as his sudden urgency allowed him. Instantly her eyes popped open, distressed, worried.

'What is it, has some thing happened?' She asked, struggling to sit up, alert almost instantly.

'No, love. I'm sorry I didn't mean to worry you. I just-', he paused and took a breath, 'I just couldn't bear to go to sleep with you angry at me, we've never gone to bed angry before and tonight is not a good night to start. I wanted to talk this through again.'

Defences ever at the ready, she responded, 'I'm not backing down, Remus. I'm going, you have to respect that. Dammit, Remus, I haven't questioned your right to go and that's not because I'm not fucking terrified that I might lose you, it's because I understand the need to see this through. Surely you can get that.'

He hung his head. He did get it, of course he did. Tomorrow might very well be the day when this whole madness ends. He just desperately didn't want it to end with the madness of grief.

He shifted closer to her and wrapped his arm around her shoulders, pulling her head to rest high on his chest, threading his fingers through her already sleep-mussed locks. 'I do get it, love, I do.' He said before pressing a kiss to her temple.

That was obviously not the response that Tonks had expected for she lifted her head abruptly and looked him in the eye.

'I'm sorry, I shouldn't have. I just can't bear the thought of loosing you, I just want to protect you. I was being selfish, I suppose.' He answered the question she had asked with her eyes.

'Eh? Selfish? How d'you work that out? You were just trying to protect me, and whilst I appreciate the sentiment, I don't need your protection nearly as much as you think I do.' Her typically frank manner lessened the tension considerably and felt himself relaxing slightly.

'I do know that, Dora but when I think about life without you-' he had to stop. He blinked back the tears that stung, took a deep breath. Instantly her hand was on his face, caressing his cheek. Her eyes met his and as always when they connected like this, he knew she understood, perfectly. He didn't need to continue.

He pulled her to him more firmly. He savoured the sensation of her arms wrapping around his body, of her pulling herself closer until they met in the middle. A kiss. A simple kiss, but one of understanding, of forgiveness.

When hands met bodies in confident exploration, it was the simple and seemingly natural urgency with which their bodies responded that drove each to their precipice. Declarations of love and physical acts of loving intimacy.

Breathless, afraid and yet sated somehow, she turned to him.

tbc

Please review if you have a moment, I'd love to know what you think of it.