It's been five years; five years since you told me you loved me. Five years since, you asked me on our first of many dates. It's been five years since I vowed to never love another. This should be the one of the happiest days of my life, but instead it's yet another day of heartbreak and broken promises. I suppose I shouldn't even feel disappointed anymore, it shouldn't, but it still hurts like the first time you ever broke a promise to me.
I still remember the first time you disappointed me like it was yesterday. The way my heart constricted so tightly I just knew that I was surely having heart failure. I remember how you lied to me, and lied to me for months until I finally called you on your bullshit. Then you blamed me and said it was my fault. My fault?! That I was being too clingy, I was suffocating you. That people were going to start asking questions. That it was best if we weren't seen with each other so much, but out with other people. So we needed to stop spending so much time together.
I can't believe I actually believed you and that you were just watching out for us. You told me Lindsey was nothing more than a friend and I was the only one for you. God I was so naive and gullible, but I ate it right up because why Tegan, my Tegan lie to me and sound so sincere while doing it. It just wasn't possible and would never have even crossed my mind.
So you can imagine the heartache I felt when mom told me that you and Lindsey had finally made it official, after three years of you chasing fucking chased after a straight girl. I thought that I would surely die, that mom was lying. Like no, Tegan would have told me if that were true. Right? Because you wouldn't cheat on me, not your fucking soul mate. You wouldn't hurt me like that, break me like that.
It's been three years since I felt the true pain of heartbreak. It's been to two years since you started forgetting all of our anniversaries. It's been one year since you said I love you and I actually believed you. It's been six months since you even touched me. It's been two weeks since you last kissed me, and I could taste her on you. It's been five years since you made me believe in love. It's been five years, and for three of those years you chased after another girl. It's been five years since I gave you my heart. It's been five years and you don't even remember that its our anniversary, where are you? It's been five years and I'm sitting here alone yet again waiting for you to remember to me, to put me first. It's been five years and I'm done.
Happy Anniversary Tegan,
Sara
A/N: This is my first story so please be nice. Constructive criticism is always nice as well. xo Char