The sequel at last! ;) I started working on this the moment I finished To Dance With A Prince, but I had to work on To Love A Thief a bit since it'll take longer to complete. I for one am extremely excited for this story, the sequel to my first-ever story on FFN! I was surprised and delighted that I didn't get any flames for that one, so that was just another incentive to get to work on this one.

Hopefully To Love A Thief will get uploaded soon, StarryNyte and I are working on it now. I'm not sure how often I'll be able to update this one since I'm kind of writing two stories at once. Enough of my incessant babbling, enjoy!

And a note: if you're re-reading this, don't freak at the changes. My muse just recently made a major come-back, so the plot got a little changed around, and I had to make a few adjustments.

Oh, and I almost forgot...disclaimers, how I love thee! *cough*not!*cough*
I do not own Narnia in any way, shape, or form...I'd need a genie for that to happen.

Prologue

The timbers of the ship groaned under my feet as the Dawn Treader slowly made port, her royal purple sail no longer billowing forward with the wind. A huge crowd had gathered to welcome their king and the crew home after their long voyage, the joy unmistakable on their faces. Maybe it was strange that this joy had no effect on me, but then again, maybe not - it's not every day you make a decision like the one I'd just made.

A soft breeze blew my hair in front of and across my face as I allowed a single tear to escape my eyes and trail down my cheek. It didn't seem so bad right now; he wasn't anywhere near me – he was with her. I suppose I was right, that night I dreamed of him with someone else. Intuition really doesn't lie, does it?

My ears picked up the sound of boots walking across the deck, toward me. I didn't even have to look to know who it was - I knew the sound of his footsteps better than I knew the sound of my own heartbeat. Why did he do this? Why torture me like this? Why did he continue to seek me out, though I'd made it quite apparent I had no interest in talking anymore?

I stood ready to disembark the minute I could, but I was afraid that minute wouldn't come soon enough. I didn't want to talk with him anymore, we'd done plenty of that and the only thing he'd wanted to discuss was things I had no desire to. My will was hardened by having to grow up long before I was ready back home, and I'd remained as stubborn as ever. My secrets were my own, and my past was my burden to carry; mine alone, and no one else's. I know it's supposed to be easier if you tell someone about bad things that happen to you, but some things aren't meant to ever be told. Or if they are, it's years afterward – not mere months later.

Finally, the gangway was in place, and I stepped off the Dawn Treader without a moment's hesitation just as the boots came close enough that he could have reached out and touched my shoulder had I stayed put. But I wasn't a good girl anymore – I was stubborn and alone.

"Laurah? Laurah!"

I heard him calling for me, but I wasn't going back. Half of me wanted to desperately, the other half knew better. And so I set my jaw and began making my way through the crowd as quickly as I could without it being obvious that I was on the run. I was careful to not draw attention, and I'd gotten rather talented at avoiding it when I wanted to back at the place I'd used to call home.

My body was small and wiry, smaller than ever since I hadn't felt like eating in days, allowing me to slip through the masses of people with relative ease. Most of them were so focused on the return of the Dawn Treader that they didn't even notice me squeeze past them. I made sure the tears trailing down my face were silent, holding in any sobs with a will I hadn't felt in a long time. A hysteria was beginning to creep through my veins, a hysteria that put the agony I'd felt so long ago after dreaming of leaving Narnia and my sprite family to shame.

I didn't look back, though he was still calling my name. My eyes were focused on the forest, the last place I could turn to, and nothing else. Healing seemed to linger inside the safety of the trees, a healing I desperately needed. Fighting off the urge to let myself break down, I tried to shove the events of the voyage out of my head, but to no avail. They tormented my mind, taunting me with the memories, so many memories. Of a mist as deadly as it was crafty, of a past I'd forced myself to forget long ago, of falling for one I could never have. She was better for him; she was a better…friend to him than I could ever have hoped to be. How could I have been so foolish? How could I have hoped to mean anything to him? How did I ever think he might love me? So many questions plagued my thoughts, giving me no peace from the agony that now throbbed as constant as my heartbeat. The crowd was beginning to thin out a little and I could now break into a jog. His voice began to fade away as I went faster and faster.

My feet pounded on the cobblestones and my arms pumped at my sides. I ran past a baker's shop, the sweet scent of freshly-made bread wafting out, but holding no comfort for me. I ran past the tailor's shop, vibrantly colored fabric flashing in my peripheral vision. I ran past the blacksmith's, the heat from the furnace inside briefly wrapping around me as I raced past. I ran and ran, not even noticing what I passed now. The comfort of the trees was close.

I ran as fast as I possibly could, momentarily noticing that his voice had faded away altogether as I tried to see through the tears blurring my vision. The forest was now nothing more than a blur of brown and green, a phantom that threatened to disappear from the earth. I blinked the salt water out of my eyes, the tiniest fraction of relief twinkling inside me when the forest proved to be real. Twigs snapped and leaves rustled as I burst into the trees, going deeper and deeper into the ancient wood. I was a machine now, a machine programmed to never stop, though my body shook with the effort of staying at a full-out run.

My feet began to stumble.

I kept running.

My knees began to give out.

I kept running.

My muscles burned with the need to stop.

I kept running.

My heartbeat roared in my ears, my entire body shook, and my lungs screamed for rest, for air.

I didn't stop.

I ran on all I had left; I ran on will alone. I didn't find strength in love - there was none for me. I didn't find strength thinking of him - he was not mine. I didn't find strength even in myself - I was too torn and broken, my heart shattered on the cold, hard concrete of reality. The only thing I had left was sheer will to reach the one thing I still had: family. I still had my sister, my mother; if I had nothing else, I had them.

I had no idea where in the woods I was, or how long I'd been running. But then again, did any of that really matter? I had lost almost everything; what did it matter if I was two steps into the forest or two thousand, if I'd been running ten minutes or ten hours?

Excruciating pain pulsed though my entire being - pain of leaving him, of possibly never seeing him again. I hated that I still wanted desperately to stay with him, despite knowing we were not meant to be. And so I ran, hoping that desire would fade away just as his voice had. I knew I couldn't run forever, but for now it was the one thing keeping me from completely losing it, from letting go of the cliff I hung on to by my fingernails. I was slowly slipping, but I still hung on to any last shreds of sanity left in me, though the welcoming dark beckoned me into its sweet oblivion. There would be no pain in unconsciousness.

But I still forced my body to its absolute limit, desperate to get as deep within the forest as possible. It seemed that the deeper I went, the farther away the escalating pain would be. I ran until my legs finally gave out beneath me and I fell to the ground, unable to run any more. Almost instantaneously, the agony rushed up and consumed me, leaving me with nothing to do but weep uncontrollably into the leaves. I curled up into a tight, helpless little ball, the ache of a shattering heart vibrating through me, growing and growing until it drowned out all else. How did it all come to this?

Thinking hurt too much, and I slowly let myself fall into the nothingness that promised at least a whisper of respite from the pain of losing the only man I had ever truly loved.

Okay, I know that was a little depressing, but bear with me. I like to shake things up a bit and keep all you lovely readers guessing. ;) Don't worry if you're confused right now, you're supposed to be.

And now you know what to do for an update...

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